To tell DH I don’t like his signature dish?

[Notsympatheticenough]

He makes beef burgers. It’s his thing, bbq with beef burgers. He’s a good cook, cooks other stuff really well. But he’s convinced his dry, stodgy, unseasoned beef burgers are the best thing he does. I’ve avoided eating them pretty much for the last 10 years of our relationship, there’s usually other stuff, people round, it’s a bbq…you know? . Tonight he said ‘as a treat, I’ll just do the burgers’.

my heart sank. And the little hungry bit of me died a bit.

I used to hint, but it never worked. Now I always take the honesty route, but to be honest it doesn't go down well.

My DH's problem is timing - he doesn't think about what's going to be ready at what time, so he'll either cook things too early so that they're cold by the time the meal is ready, or he'll leave it cooking until he's ready and it will be overcooked. That and using every single pan and utensil!

This reminds me of the first time I cooked for a guy I was going out with. Ask the usual "is there anything you don't like?" No, he likes everything. I like a roast but only had a rolled shoulder of lamb in the freezer. Not my favourite. I've got an amazing recipe for Apricot Yoghurt Lamb. It marinates the lamb in a yoghurt mix and makes it really tender - perfect I thought.

So I'm cooking up a lovely roast. He arrives. Is that lamb? Yes, is that ok? Sure it's fine. Getting to the last stage where you make the apricot yoghurt sauce - is that apricot? Yes, don't you like apricot? No it's fine.

To his credit he sat down and ate dinner. I found out some time later that he hated both roast lamb and apricot. In a last minute twist to the story, apricot yoghurt lamb became his favourite meal - it is an amazing recipe. Unfortunately I made so many marinated roasts while we were together that I haven't made one since!

I'd try the same tactic I used with my ex BFs mum - big up other things he makes that you really like (in an exaggerated way) so if he wants to 'treat' you, he will make that.

I guess for me when in rome, but then it does depend on the food item's

My OH made a fresh dip the other day, to go with our buffet style tea (we were both being too lazy to cook a big meal) so we were having lots of nibbly bits, and apparently....(for 3 days solid).....this is the BEST thing he's EVER made, he can't believe how amazing it tasted, he'll have to do it again, did I notice all the flavours??? etc etc etc.........nothing was mentioned about the fact I'd gone out, bought everything, prepped everything, made lots of my own stuff too.....just this bloody dip 😂😂 I love him really, but honestly....the way he went on about it 😂😂

@FancyFelix Oh God, DP does this too. Even if it’s simple “put frozen food in oven” stuff he’ll do the chips, then take them out and put them aside and do the fish fingers. Then call me down to tea. Then put the peas on. Then put cutlery on the table. Eventually I might get to eat everything, but not at the same time. He says he doesn’t mind food cold?

He once started cooking something while I was doing bedtime then DD kicked off so we had to swap. He was following a recipe so he’d chopped the onion, which was in stage 1. Then fried pork mince, which was stage 2, except he hadn’t completed the rest of stage 1 which was frying the onion and adding garlic and spices. And you were meant to add the pork to the onion, along with beef. But instead I had fried pork mince left to go cold, and raw onion, and none of the in-between bits. Just zero logic to it, like he was rolling a dice across the page and just doing bits at random.

My ex was very proud of his tuna pizza. I’m not a big fan of warm tinned tuna, but in the beginning it was delicious!

We moved house and the tuna pizza got worse and worse. New pan? New hob? No idea. It was the base - a scone dough cooked in a pan. Used to be light and fluffy. It turned flat and oily.

He knew. I knew. Neither of us could talk about it. He’d get too upset. Eventually he just stopped making it, thank fuck.

Even now I can’t face warm tinned tuna. 🤢

Mine is stir fry which is always overdone, boiled stir fry. And nothing else.

Only the heady hormones of a lusty relationship in its infancy could fool anyone into thinking tuna pizza was delicious

I think at least with something like burgers or steaks, you’re making an individual portion so it’s easier to make requests for your own preference. You can say ‘I’d like some…seasoning on my burger’ or ‘take mine off the bbq a couple of minutes before yours please’

if it was a curry or a one pot dish, it’s harder to make something for different tastes.

there’s nothing wrong with having different preferences and tastes though, just having a bit of tact and not criticising ( I wouldn’t appreciate if someone said my food was terrible, but if they said they liked something spicier, milder, more well done etc that’s not a big issue)

Mine makes worse mashed potato it's like milky water he calls it creamy

XH thought his flapjack was the best thing ever.

It was grim. Sugarless, dry, hard, brittle awful stuff. He wondered towards the end of our marriage why I never ate it.

Cos it's vomit inducing you clutz 🤦

I tried telling hubby I hated bolognese full stop. Then I tried calling my bolognese a ragu which he was suspicious about. Eventually I had to admit I actually hated HIS bolognese mince boiled in plum tomatoes with raw onions. He was heartbroken. But ultimately I don't care because I stopped having to eat it!

@billy1966 My husbands are delicious.

A polygamist cannibal ! 😄

Undercooked scrambled egg baffles me. I find it far too easy to overcook, even when I'm really trying not to.

Burgers are great but really I think everyone has different preferences as to what actually goes in the burger.

My dads “signature” dish is bbq lamb leg. I feel so bad, because he puts so much effort into it but it’s absolutely atrocious. I dont have the heart to tell him either.

My oh is excellent at cooking meat and terrible at sides and sauces. The problem with this is he’ll make a perfectly nice steak and then slather it in what can only be described as wallpaper paste before I can stop him. It’s heartbreaking.

I keep offering to take over help but he isn’t getting the hint.

I am taking notes! I've been the inferior cook in all my relationships, mostly through lack of practice at the time. I'm the one who grew the vegetables/herbs/fruit though, so I got away with it. I think I've improved, cooking for myself. I hope so.

My DP bbq skills are like this. Everything is cremated.

Tell DH the menopause has changed your taste buds- let’s face it, it ruins everything else. You need seasoning

Back in the dark ages when I'd only just known my DH to be for about a month, I was laid up in my flat ill as anything with the flu and he cycled over to see me with a catering sized coffee jar full of what he called cauliflower cheese to cheer me up and make me feel better. It was mushy cauliflower with watery cheese and chunks of half cooked onion floating about in it. Grim. I married him in the end. No regrets.

LTB

Hahahhaha, that really made me chuckle! I can just picture it and how proud he probably is!

DHs homemade chips!! I didn’t realise you could ruin potato’s until I met him and he first made me chips! He makes pale, hard sticks of sadness! I now tell him I prefer fries and buy them!

Everytime I suggest making them he jumps in and wants to do them!

I’ve stopped mentioning them now and sneak off to my parents ( or any other friend or relative) for a plateful when I know they are making them!!

Good job I love him as he’s basically ruined my life! I did consider LTB

The first meal my dh made me was an omelette. It was chewy and tasted disgusting! I don’t know how anyone could possibly make an omelette taste so vile. Not wanting to upset him, I smothered it in tomato sauce (I never use tomato sauce) and forced myself to eat it. I was just finishing it when he sat down to eat his. After 5 seconds, he said “that’s bloody awful, here you can have mine too since you’ve finished yours”!

You need a dog.