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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to consider letting my 8 year odl leave school early today - for no good reason?

87 replies

MamaG · 31/01/2008 13:40

We had dental appt at 3. Dentist is in the next county (yes, COUNTY) along a horrible A road. When weather bad, lorries regularly tip over and the raod is often closed due to weather.

It is extremely windy/haily today and so I've rearranged appt for next week. However - school think she's leaving at 2 to go to dentist, now I've cancelled I'm toying with still collecting her at 2 and bringing her home to bake chocolate muffins with me an DS (age 3) and snuggle up in front of the fire.

Its a bad idea isn't it

OP posts:

seeker · 31/01/2008 14:08

If you can find a way to do it so that you do all the lying, then go for it. I would collect her - start off, then say the weather's too bad and pretend to ring and rearrange. Then say oh well, it's too late to go back to school - shall we just go home?. But she must believe you.

amidaiwish · 31/01/2008 14:08

sorry but i really don't see what the harm would have been.

You could have picked up DD, got home, then told her the weather is too bad the appt has been cancelled and rescheduled for next week. no big deal. never mind, these things happen.

it's not like you were going to say to her "oooh, i picked you up but i was just pretending, don't tell anyone we are going to bake muffins instead..." now i agree that would be sending the wrong message/getting her to lie.

LadyMuck · 31/01/2008 14:09

So would children lie about that at 8? Ds1 is only in Year 2, but I'm willing to bet that if we did this, everyone would know by end of school the following day.

seeker · 31/01/2008 14:09

Oops, sorry too late. Oh. well, next time.....

WiiMii · 31/01/2008 14:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WiiMii · 31/01/2008 14:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Wisteria · 31/01/2008 14:16

I am flabbergasted that so many of you think it is ok to lie to schools and involve your dcs in it, would you not get cross if your dcs lied to you? By lying at all you are teaching them that it is ok - at the end of the day everything that Mamag wants to do can be easily done an hour later so there's no point in it.

I wouldn't lie to my dcs and I don't expect them to lie to me either (obviously they do as they are teenagers ) but they get punished a lot for lying.

Original poster

MamaG · 31/01/2008 14:31

I'm going straight to hell

OP posts:

Wisteria · 31/01/2008 14:34

PMSL - sure MamaG I think the entrance criteria would be a little more strenuous than that

Original poster

MamaG · 31/01/2008 14:35

OP posts:

amidaiwish · 31/01/2008 15:08

spending a lovely hour with your dd when her dentist appt has been cancelled is precious time.
so yes, i would lie...

quint · 31/01/2008 15:12

Sorry I also think its a bad thing to take her away from school for no reason.

Baking cakes is a lovely idea do it an hour later so she can finish her school day, then you don;t feel guilty and have to lie or involve DD in everything

MaryAnnSingleton · 31/01/2008 17:38

agree with quint there

FillyjonkisCALM · 31/01/2008 17:49

nah yanbu

baking cakes is fun

Sarahjct · 31/01/2008 17:51

Work ethics??? Lying??? She's 8, isn't she? Or have I missed something...

Wow, I see things have changed big time from when I was a child (not that long ago!). When did the tiniest little thing become such a crime? When did parents give over total control of their children to other people? It's not like she was missing out on a GCSE exam. It would have been an hour at school vs some quality time with her mother that she might not have got later when the after school/homework/tea time rush starts.

Sorry, this kind of thing really bugs me.

potoroo · 31/01/2008 17:53

My mother took us out of school for a one off day - I think I was in reception or year 1 - to take us out to the beach and aquarium. I don't know why - I think she thought I needed a day off. Or maybe she did She was a teacher too and places a lot of value on education.

But 30 years later I STILL remember how special that day was.

Not that I would advocate lying of course ;)

Lulumama · 31/01/2008 17:54

hardly making a habit of it... people take their children out of school for 2 weeks at a time for holidays due to work commitments etc.. so missing one day a year to bake cakes with mum is hardly the crime of the century? at 8n they are not missing anything that is going to leave them floundering .....

Lulumama · 31/01/2008 17:56

sorry, not even half a day !!!

have seen so many threads were parents are told it is ok to take kids out for a couple of days for a special occasion or holiday, why is this any different ...?

go for it mamag

pointydog · 31/01/2008 17:56

I think it's a lame idea.

Lulumama · 31/01/2008 17:56

sorry, not even half a day !!!

have seen so many threads were parents are told it is ok to take kids out for a couple of days for a special occasion or holiday, why is this any different ...?

go for it mamag

Lulumama · 31/01/2008 17:56

sorry, not even half a day !!!

have seen so many threads were parents are told it is ok to take kids out for a couple of days for a special occasion or holiday, why is this any different ...?

go for it mamag

lazarou · 31/01/2008 17:57

Oh MamaG, you had the chance to be a bit of a rebel and you bottled it.

Wisteria · 31/01/2008 17:57

Well it is an ethic (like it or not I'm afraid)and it's far easier to instill the 'no choice' attitude at 8 than it is at 13 IME.

Lying IMHO is bad at any age and certainly not something to be condoned by a parent.

Yes baking cakes is lovely - we do it all the time but my children are home from 3.15 until bedtime which gives plenty of opportunity for 'fun' things.

They are off school for at least 13 weeks of the year plus countless inset days so the relatively short time they spend at school is proportionately low.

pointydog · 31/01/2008 17:57

why is this any dofferent? Because there isn't actually anything going on. Sheesh

Lulumama · 31/01/2008 17:58

sorry for the multiple posts

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