Are you buying teachers and TAs christmas presents?

[Merryoldgoat]

I like to usually donate to the collection but there isn't one this year.

So as a Teacher/TA would you like a gift or is it just tat/another fucking candle you could do without? The reality is how can I possibly know what they'd like? I suppose I could just do a bottle of Prosecco?

YABU - guy a gift
YANBU - no gifts required

I assume you're not a teacher if you think teachers get given 'lots of appreciation' all year . Lots of abuse, stress, blame and aggravation more like!

I certainly don't think anyone should have to get teachers anything if they can't afford to, or just don't want to, but am surprised at all the people completely discouraging it - most teachers spend more time with your kids on the average weekday that you do, so no idea why buying a small gift once/twice a year is apparently excessive/inappropriate or should be discouraged if people want to do it!

Also lots of people buy not just for the teachers, who are on 'a wage' (albeit not a great one when you consider the amount of unpaid overtime they do!) but also TAs, who are pretty much on minimum wage and don't get paid for most of the holidays.

I would bet that a lot of people on here saying buying presents for teaching staff is inappropriate also jump on the 'tips' ones saying anyone who doesn't leave a tip is a cheapskate who shouldn't eat out - yet most waiting staff get paid more than TAs.

There's a thread on here right now about how much teachers are struggling, on long term sick, positions are going unfilled, because it's such a thankless job - if buying a bottle of wine or writing a nice note goes even a tiny way towards mitigating that, why wouldn't you?

Not a teacher btw, just have friends that are and have seen the stress they are under.

please don’t buy teachers presents. It’s totally ridiculous and seems to run out of the end of primary School.

No.

One teacher has absolutely failed to deal with a bullying issue regarding my DD.

The other has spent the whole term putting pissy PA messages about DS’s spellings in his reading diary.

Its a private school and the teachers and TA’s kids attend the school at a discounted rate of 75%, subsidised by those of us paying full fees.

Am I fuck buying them a present.

As a teacher, I would prefer not to have gifts. I have so many expensive Yankee Candles. I don't drink, so alcohol goes to a friend. Chocolate usually goes to the food bank.
I would rather have a hand made card or a thank you from a parent.
As I teach in a very deprived area, I know many are struggling to heat or to eat.
Most teachers I know feel the same.

That is an unnecessary amount. If you've got loads contributing £1/2 is more than enough. It's really got out of hand.

Get him out of that school!!

@primeoflife im working on it! I’ve posted a bit about this on MN and Currently have an application in for the local outstanding state school to start in summer term. My kids will be gutted but they’ll also be fine - I’d never in a million years put them in a private school ever again - full of nepotism for staff’s children and absolute fear of bollocking a bully from a rich and/or large family in case the parents pull them out

Please don't but alcohol. I'm a non drinking TA and every year I receive numerous bottles of alcohol. I either give them to a colleague or my sister /neice. I really appreciate the thought but feel so guilty that parents have spent money on me only for me to give it away. Candles, chocolates, mugs etc all the way for me. Having said that, I don't expect anything.

Good luck!!

Why do primary teachers get sooo much

yet by secondary ?…

Yes. They do a fab job of teaching and helping my daughter

we have a class wats app

i guess I am class rep /pass on info

a lovely mum is doing a collection which I have sent money to

TA here, I’m always absolutely thrilled to be remembered but a card is perfect, especially if it’s a homemade one by the child or includes a drawing. I save those.

No. I really don't want a gift. I don't want a mug, there's enough chocolate at Christmas and I don't drink coffee.

I don't even want a picture. I like your kid and spend a lot of my time thinking and planning and working with them to help them. I do it because I enjoy it and because I'm paid to do it.

Extra stuff stresses me out. I have to find a place for it (I won't have time). It'll end up being purged alongside a lot of other unneeded stuff.

If you want to be nice and thoughtful, please send an email to the head or governors and tell them something I've done that has supported your child this year.

I gave my DC money to put into the class collection because I felt obliged to. But personally I think it’s shocking that some parents have even started a collection during this time of financial crisis! I know it’s technically optional but you can’t be seen to be the only one not contributing, and you don’t want your kid to be the odd one out and people talking about how you didn’t contribute, or picking on your kid because they didn’t put any money in. Some of the kids in my DCs class are Ukrainian refugees and the mums in question have approached their mums to ask for money too, as if they have it to spare. The school should be banning teacher gifts imo and asking parents not to do this.

Husband's school actively encourage no staff presents and have done since before COVID. Esp now They are well aware that many families are struggling themselves.
As a parent we were asked not to do gifts during COVID so we gave a small donation to an animal charity and local food bank. We did a little slip/certificate in their cards telling them we had made the donation.

We get vouchers for ours

ones that can be used in most places

so no clutter

Some of children over the years have made me things...a Christmas decoration simply by threading beads on a loop of ribbon, those wooden boxes in various shapes you can buy from the works then paint and stick "jewels" onto...things like that.

I still think of those children every time I use the box, and hang the decoration each year.

If you want to get them something, that's the way to go. But we really don't expect anything. Whole class vouchers etc seem to be a Mumsnet thing, not real life!

I suppose it's because a primary teacher has a class and teaches them every day apart from PPA. It's a different bond.

My dds had a few secondary teachers they wanted to get gifts for, but I think it's unusual to buy for secondary.

Because in secondary school not only does your child have a form teacher and head of year they can also have up to 15 different subject teachers

Yet none deserve a gift. Interesting isn’t it I wonder what the true motives of the gift is? 😀

You shouldn't assume that not everyone buys gifts for secondary school teachers, I'm simply offering an explanation as to why they drop off. It could easily go into hundreds of pounds if you buy for all teachers there and that just if you only have one child at the school.

But the form teacher has the daily overall care of the child. And it is harder as you only see them for up to 30 mins a day. Having a form in high school is a massive job. Im doing a truly difficult and underpaid role in school this year just so i dont have to have a form as it is such a time suck.

I'm not discrediting the role a form teacher plays with my comment as my children's form teachers do a wonderful job and are my first point of contact for any query or concern. I was just pointing out that there are more people teach your child in secondary school to the person that asked the question.

Generally, though, if you’re buying gifts for teachers for six years, and often quite lavish ones, is it really hard to buy a form tutor or a head of year, particularly if either of them, I’ve helped you out with tricky, teenage issues, a little something?

Depends which family!