Would you allow this?

[LollyPops123]

Daughter 23, moving into new house with boyfriend. They want to take the family cat who is 14 and getting on a bit. Aibu to ask if you would be ok with this?

Depends whether or not I wanted to keep the cat. If I did I’d say no.

If its the family cat then no, it stays where it is. If it has always been her cat then yes.

Of course not!

Tell her and her BF to get their own damn cat, the rescues are overwhelmed with cats needing a home, so she and BF can give another cat a home, your family cat already has one with you. Plus uprooting a 14yr old cat unnecessarily would be cruel.

No, cats hate change. I wouldn't.

If its a family cat then it should stay in the family home, not move to her new home. At 14 as well I don't think it's fair on a cat to do that. Particularly if it's an outside cat and learning to go out and new roads to cross and other neighbourhood cats to contend with.

I assume she is also agreeing to pay for all insurance, vets bills, deworming, flea treatments etc. Older cats often come with expensive problems.

What's your DDs reasoning? Is it 'her' cat or the 'family' cat (what was the understanding from the outset)? Is there a bond between DD and cat? Is the new home/area safe for an elderly cat? How do you feel about it? This would all sway my thinking.

Only if it’s beneficial to the cat in some way. My daughter wanted the same and it was difficult as she is the cats favourite person. But she moved to a flat and it was unfair on the cat to become an indoor cat at age 7 so cat stayed with us. She long ago mastered the local area and has become more social with us since dd went so it all worked out.

Is the cat hers?

No although my mum wouldn’t have minded as she wasn’t that attached to our cat

It depends who actually looks after the cat

No, it's cruel to uproot a cat of that age.

Aw, keep the poor old cat in the place it’s familiar with.

On the scant information from the post I'd say no...

No. My mum did this and the cat died after 6 weeks. Cats that age can't really take that moving stress coupled with a new family routine

Of course not. Terribly unfair to cat.

if cat could be happy at new home then probably yes

No I would not uproot an elderly animal. Shelters are full of young cats looking for new homes which would be far more sensible an option

If it was my beloved cat, no.

If it was DC's leaky stinky old cat that misses the litter tray pees in the corner and needs daily expensive prescription med from vet I'd be delighted.

No. If the cat is the family cat
(Rather than hers) then of course the cat should stay with you.
I remember going to uni and asking mum if I can take our cat (family cat) she said no. It was only cos I'd miss him so much. She said I know you'll miss him but he can't come with you.
You need to say the same. Unless you're not bothered about the cat!!

Family cat stays in the family home. I personally would say no, especially at that age, it’s not worth the stress it could cause.

No , cat would be staying put unless there is some overwhelming reason it should go .

My cat was distraught when we moved all the furniture out of the living room to decorate for 3 days so no way would she be happy with being taken to a strange home.
I’d say no, for the cats welfare. If she loves the cat she should put it first rather than her own feelings.

No. It’s a lot for a cat of that age and is only to her benefit.

I had to “forfeit” my cats when I moved as a young adult for similar reasons. It can be really upsetting but ultimately it is down to what is best for the pet

I had to leave my dog when I left home because he was 13 and it wouldn't have been at all fair to completely change his environment and routine just for me. (Fortunately my mother agreed!). He was my boy forever...he just didn't live with me anymore.

Cat is too old to be moved for non-critical reasons IMO.

No, the cat stays. Studies suggest that cats bond to territories more than their actual carers. Taking away a very elderly cat from its home and caretakers is beyond cruel, and id definitely more for their benefit than the cats. They can go to a rescue and get a different cat. Fyi my sister had this argument about the dog when she left home. The dog was bought as a birthday present to her when she was 5, and was brought up in a large rural house with a huge garden where someone was almost always home. She was actually surprised when my parents put their foot down over moving a 14yo half blind and deaf animal into a 3rd story flat with no garden with her out most of the day.