To think this is the embodiment of miserable fuckers

[Scrooooooooge]

Something they want

something they need

something to wear

something to read

I mean - how bloody joyless is that bloody thing?

I think you’ve missed the point of the poem. I with many others I know follow it and this is what Father Christmas brings.
You can buy additional gifts that are from you!

A living room full of presents is the opposite of joyful for me. It screams consumerism, greed, excess, and blindness to everything else that's going on in the world. It would make me very, very uncomfortable.

Yep. Far better to get:
Something they don't want
Something they have no use for
Something they have no clue how to use
Some random bit if tat that entertains for all of 20 seconds.

Great Christmas

I can't think of anything dd needs 🤔😂 so I've already ruined the poem.

We don't do stockings in our house (I used to, but it was just full of tat that never got used-slipper socks, sweets, plastic toys) so now I just buy dd what she wants- no tat, no waste, happy dd.

Someone asked up thread if people that buy alot still do fun days out. We always go Ice skating, and we used to go to watch a panto but havent been since covid and tbh dd isn't that fussed.

This year we are going away for 3 days, Xmas markets, light trails, ice skating, fairground rides.

Everyone does Xmas different.

OR a selection of things you think they’d like, without the snidey little poem for Instagram.

I agree. I would find that very upsetting and rather awful. Definitely not a proper Christmas. Actually, the opposite of a proper Christmas.

@Greytea

Yes we do those things too.
No, I don't run out of ideas for things to get them.

So people who buy. a room full of presents. Genuine question?

If you buy a room full of presents each year where do you put them?

Man alive - it’s a helpful guide to make sure we don’t go completely overboard and over but, not a formal rule!

YABU and some of you are the miserable fuckers. There will be some children who “only” get 4 presents but I hope they’ll be more grown up about it than some of the adults on here.

My teenager lost his earphones and needs a replacement. We were very fortunate to come into some money this year and earmarked some of it for luxuries, so he’s getting AirPods. Poor neglected boy!

It's not daft at all. It represents a good starting point for ideas. It can also help people work out how to cut down from excess so that they are only buying things which are truly valued. You're the only one who is suggesting that those who go by it must be rigid literalists.

What is daft is calling things that other people are perfectly happy with "joyless".

You've got their hackles up, op.

@Teder but AirPods are a necessity! I buy my kids AirPods whenever they need them! Christmas is for spoiling !!

/sarky

I do exactly this every year. So each child gets 4 presents from me (single mum). They also get a tonne of stuff from other relatives, which are often far less thoughtful tat that they don't really appreciate.

I find it gives me focus, makes me think really hard about what they should get (and if they really need new pants then I might also stretch to a new cardi/ whatever else is getting too short) and just add it in.

My presents are far better received than the thoughtless shite they get given, because they know I've thought long and hard about every single one of their 4 items each.

Well it depends on whether you think presents measure love or whether you buy piles of tat to arrange around the tree for a instagram worthy pic or use as a FB boast.

So, what is wrong with 'something they want, something they need etc..' & what is miserable about it?
I used to do it when my son was tiny & it not only saved me a fortune, but means he doesn't expect a transit van full of plastic tat every year.

This year, my son wants a gold coin for Christmas.
He also wants a particular massive Lego set.
He doesn't 'need' a gold coin or a Lego set.
He'll be blown away when he gets them though.
No misery involved & I absolutely can't see how getting him the only 2 things he genuinely wants makes me an mf.

He loves reading & always gets at least half a dozen books at Christmas, so he'll be happy with those too.

He is actually getting a couple more bits including a stocking, but he doesn't need anything at all & that includes clothes.

What junk should I be piling the room high with OP so you don't think that's joyless, instead of getting him the 2 things he really wants?

He's already said he'd be happy to get nothing else for Christmas if he just gets ONE of those two things.

A lot depends on the age of the children doesn't it ? A teen might need a laptop, want a new top of the range bike, only wear branded clothing, book is probably the cheapest present.
A four year old might need a new lunch box or backpack, they might want lego or a skooter, christmas onsie for something to wear and a nice book to read to them. It is far easier to spend £100 on one than the other and look like you aren't a scrooge !

Mine 'needs' a new bike.

Our Santa is also really miserable, because the book is always from him and the only thing in the stocking 😁

I failed to mention both my kids are avid readers, and I reckon one of the reasons is that books have always been made special in my household, the stocking thing being one.

The 'need' and 'want' categories illustrated as a Venn diagram in our household are basically a circle

🥇

You do know that if you don't like something, you don't need to do it. You also don't have to call other people names because it works for them. The 4 present rule works for lots people, including those with limited funds, limited space and those who have children who already have everything they could possibly need. The fact that you can't imagine that 4 things can be way more joyful and meaningful than 100 really does suggest that it is you who is pretty miserable.

Not my DC but me... I need a new car battery and a carpet cleaner, which are both incredibly dull.

I want some new trainers, and an Adidas tracksuit, a Ring doorbell, plus some new CDs. All of which I don't need.

My DC want plastic tat and other toys/junk they don't need, so I will buy them such things as I like to see them being happy. They only have one childhood and it's in a mostly miserable world right now, so spreading joy is always good IMHO.

The environment and my bank balance won't thank me though lol

I've got enough people buying my kids shit that doesn't get played with or breaks within 10 minutes.

I use this as a guide and my kids have no complaints. Perfectly happy and the bonus is they grow up not being entitled little knobs.

I'd rather not a) be one of those pricks in the red top paper bragging about how many trolleys of crap my kids will forget about and b) be one of those pricks who will spend £300 on kids presents but whinge I can't pay my electric bill.

I think four presents is a bit sad if you have the money and can afford more. I don't see an issue with including needs for christmas though, socks, pants, bras, pens etc, but thats with more than 3 other gifts.

I don’t really like the poem. We just buy what people want or things we think they’ll like. We always buy our kids lots. Each to their own.

I have met a few who seem to think they’re doing it the only right way by using this poem.

It's just a little maxim, I don't know why anybody is particularly bothered one way or the other about it. Use it as a prompt/limiter when buying, or don't (whether that's because you think it's too mean or too frivolous).

Bear in mind there will be a lot of children who will receive only 'needs' as their presents - a new coat, bedroom furniture, stationery for school, whatever their parents can't afford as part of their everyday budget. I'm not sure that anyone should be shouting about people being miserable fuckers based on what goes under the Christmas tree. It's crass.