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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you want to receive this email or not?

64 replies

Bookridden · 19/11/2022 15:34

Work dilemma. Boss has been off for a month traveling and is due back on Tuesday. I'm his deputy and am keen to impress.

I am wondering whether to text him on Monday afternoon just to reassure him that everything has run smoothly and no need to get to the office early if he's still jetlagged.

Would you appreciate this, or is it best left? He's very work focused (as am I), so I thought it might put his mind at rest.

YABU - don't message, he probably doesn't give a damn

YANBU - it's a nice thought that will put his mind at rest

OP posts:
Pumperthepumper · 19/11/2022 15:35

I don’t think you should, not because he won’t care but because he’ll think it’s strange you felt the need to point it out. And if he’s your boss then he already knows he can come in whenever he likes.

Notimeforaname · 19/11/2022 15:36

No. He is your boss. You dont need to tell him he can take his time. He will run his own life as he sees fit. I would be a bit wtf if my deputy mailed me to tell me not to worry.

CaptainMalcolmReynolds · 19/11/2022 15:36

Nope, don't get in contact on Monday, he's still on leave and regardless he's f how nice your message is, it'll put his head back into work mode. Let him have his last evening. Text him early ish Tuesday instead.

CaptainMalcolmReynolds · 19/11/2022 15:37

CaptainMalcolmReynolds · 19/11/2022 15:36

Nope, don't get in contact on Monday, he's still on leave and regardless he's f how nice your message is, it'll put his head back into work mode. Let him have his last evening. Text him early ish Tuesday instead.

Pressed post to early. Text him early ish Tuesday if you think you need to, but I personally wouldn't.

Sewwhatmrmagpie · 19/11/2022 15:37

God no. If I was him I'd see that as a NOTHING TO SEE HERE!!! and my heart would sink thinking about what mess I might come back to, even if it really is all fine and your attempt to reassure was genuine.

I'd also not to this as a way to impress him. I wouldn't be impressed! He's still on holiday until he's back at work.

oldbrownjug · 19/11/2022 15:38

Depends on your relationship and the type of company.

In my old, small company I might have messaged "Welcome back, hope you had a good holiday. All good at the office. Have booked in a debrief for 10am). Type of thing.
In my new large corporation - even though I get on v well with the boss - I just wouldn't.

MustardCress · 19/11/2022 15:38

It might actually come across as saying teenager-style “don’t come in too early as we still have to tidy up before you get here”!

upfucked · 19/11/2022 15:38

It’s weird. Email him on Monday afternoon with a brief summary of anything which has happened while he was away which he needs to be aware of.

TellMeWhere · 19/11/2022 15:39

Is it really your place to tell your superior when they can come back into the office? Definitely don't send Confused

He's on leave so I wouldn't disturb him unless necessary.

ColinRobinsonsfamiliar · 19/11/2022 15:41

Nope. Don’t send that.

Original poster
Bookridden · 19/11/2022 15:41

Fair enough. Thanks for all the comments. Some good points made, and I'll leave the catch up till he's back.

OP posts:
saresm1 · 19/11/2022 15:42

Hello I am your boss. That's my role. I don't think this is weird as long as you couch in the terms of "Hey first day back today/tomorrow everything is fine - blah blah" Personally I would send it early morning of their return, but if it doubt the night before - about 8pm.

AmyFl · 19/11/2022 15:47

😁 at the use of the word superior. No-one is superior or inferior to another person.

saresm1 · 19/11/2022 15:49

welcome to business. Yes they are. And you need to play it carefully

Hillrunning · 19/11/2022 15:56

I'd find it really odd if a report of mine gave me blessings to come in late. Just email saying that all has gone well and you have scheduled a debrief for late morning.

Outtasteamandluck · 19/11/2022 15:56

No

Labnehi · 19/11/2022 15:58

AmyFl · 19/11/2022 15:47

😁 at the use of the word superior. No-one is superior or inferior to another person.

Tell that to anyone with a superior officer in the miltary. Or Police. Or to a Mother Superior.

Hillrunning · 19/11/2022 15:59

AmyFl · 19/11/2022 15:47

😁 at the use of the word superior. No-one is superior or inferior to another person.

Also this. Some roles are more junior or senior to each other. People are not superior or inferior in the workplace, ever.

Blowyourowntrumpet · 19/11/2022 15:59

Definitely don't do this

girlmom21 · 19/11/2022 16:00

Don't contact him. Let him enjoy the last few hours of peace.

user1477249785 · 19/11/2022 16:04

I always used to do a 'while you were away' note. I used up to update on major developments, ongoing issues and things that were going to need her immediate attention on return.

restorativejustice · 19/11/2022 16:05

Maybe just have a record of any developments and talk them through with him once he gets back. Don't interrupt his leave unless it's urgent.

Winterfires · 19/11/2022 16:06

I’d be offended

escapingthecity · 19/11/2022 16:06

You could send an email that will be top of his inbox when he gets back updating him on the things he most needs to know to read when he gets back

Guitarbar · 19/11/2022 16:08

I think it's fine to send a welcome back, everything ran smoothly look forward to catching up when you're ready or whatever- but cripes no to the bit about coming in when they're ready.

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