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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

A better life in Norfolk... really?

390 replies

LittleRobin112 · 14/11/2022 11:53

We have so many family members who have moved to Norfolk in the last 10 years and a few friends too. They have mostly gone there for a better way of life. Away from the hustle and bustle of the south east where we are.

We're constantly being told how amazing Norfolk is - the countryside, the villages, the coast, Norwich, etc. And some family members are very keen to tell us how crap it is where we live in comparison, knowing that we are settled where we are and wouldn't want to move. Nowhere is perfect (about from Norfolk apparently) but we like where we are. These family members have moved from where we live which although busy and a London commuter area, it's also fairly affluent in parts, a coastal place and with countryside/woodland still accessible nearby.

What is the attraction to Norfolk? Is it the most ideal place to live? Are people happier there? Are there no down sides to it at all?

I don't doubt some aspects of life quality could be better in Norfolk but I've been on holidays there and many family visits over the years and I can't see how it's as incredible as some family members are making out. Maybe they're just showing off or justifying their reasons for moving there? But to be really negative about where we live is just becoming annoying. It's almost like they're now better than us for living in Norfolk, it's so odd.

Any thoughts?

OP posts:
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6
Hastheslotharrivedyet · 29/12/2023 16:32

Thousands of new houses being built on flood plains which is likely to increase the already dire drainage problem plus add to the lack of doctor and dentist facilities. Not for me.

Silverbirchtwo · 29/12/2023 16:51

Just too flat, I like to see a hill or two.

Silverbirchtwo · 29/12/2023 16:54

They probably released a lot of equity in their houses by buying in Norfolk, so now feel flush and like they've done a great deal. Which they may have. lots of extra disposable income, makes you feel good.

Mistletoewench · 29/12/2023 17:01

Silverbirchtwo · 29/12/2023 16:51

Just too flat, I like to see a hill or two.

i realised that I am definitely a hill dweller after holidaying in Norfolk, lovely place but very flat. I like hills !!

ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea · 29/12/2023 17:51

Not sure why this thread has been resurrected?

I'm sure there are lots of positives and lots of negatives - we loved Norwich though .

PocketSand · 29/12/2023 17:51

I have lived in pretty villages in Dedham Vale and further into Suffolk - I still miss Woodbridge - but moved to north Norfolk last summer because neither Colchester or Ipswich can compete with Norwich which is accessible (village has a train station) and offers great facilities.

DS2 is currently able to independently access a fantastic city with a great 6th form college and has the option to remain at home if he wants to for uni as he already has an offer from UEA (better for his chosen degree than Essex and definitely better than Suffolk).

There are downsides, the landscape is eerily flat as you drive to the coast (I was born in the North), I do a lot of driving, but traffic is light and we have a comfortable bungalow on a large plot which is a benefit in the summer. It'll do for now and I think it might grow on me.

AlwaysPrawns · 29/12/2023 18:12

I am from London and would never move. I have been to Norfolk a couple of times. I am Asian and seem to have been lucky not to have experienced racism there. People were friendly. Beaches were nice but windy!

One thing which struck us was the huge portion sizes. We would be enormous if we lived there!

We loved the lifeboat museum in Cromer. And also the hippodrome circus with the submerging floor in Great Yarmouth! And of course the boat ride along the Norfolk broads.

I would not live there but would feel
quite upset by some of these comments if I was a Norfolk local. It can’t be all bad and I am sure plenty are not racist.

OffsideRule · 29/12/2023 18:21

The only good thing about Norfolk is seeing it through a rear view mirror.

Hastheslotharrivedyet · 29/12/2023 18:31

OffsideRule · 29/12/2023 18:21

The only good thing about Norfolk is seeing it through a rear view mirror.

Lol

beetle02 · 29/12/2023 18:32

Op, don’t do it!
Limited job opportunities.
Narrow-minded perspectives.
The transportation network between surrounding towns and villages is poor and you’ll have to drive a lot.

Exiting the county is daunting—by car, your initial hour and a half of driving may still keep you within the county. Alternatively, train travel often requires connecting through London or Cambridge for journeys to larger cities.
It's bloody expensive!

Pappleapple · 14/01/2024 00:01

I absolutely hate the place.

I’ve lived all over ; Suffolk, Bristol, London, North Norfolk, Essex and various places in Europe etc. I moved back to Norfolk as I was born in Norwich, so I thought I would come back to meet someone and settle. It is the worst mistake of my life. I am still amazed at the racism, ignorance and societal divisions that I see in Norwich and Norfolk. If you google “Depression prescription UK”, you will see that Norfolk is labelled all red. It is a very depressed place and many people suffer with social anxiety and suicide is a common theme here (Check the EDP News).

People are very insular and cannot hold what I would regard as a normal conversation unless you’re in the smaller western part of the city where the culture is more pretentious but London culture centric. Some more local people who perhaps haven’t travelled much often grunt as a response to saying “Hello”.

Norwich City is hugely divided between the mostly white Christian wealthy population and everyone else. I find the pretence here overwhelming with people looking down their nose at you as they pull their kids from their £100000 range rovers. The whole culture here is focussed on women and children only with men tagging along like slaves to their wealthy partners often from London or their local wives that have barely seen anyone other than members of their own family for tens of years.

I find that people are suspicious of everyone here and the term “foreigners” is commonly used for anyone that isn’t white British. Most of the Cafes that I frequent are full of the same types of people. Women moaning and complaining about men and lots of sad lost and often divorced men contemplating suicide or severely isolated and depressed as nobody comes through this place so they will never meet anyone new. This isn’t a dig at women but please go to a few Cafes and listen, it’s depressing and awful. As for dating, there is a huge demographic gap and there seems to be nobody here between the ages of 30 - 40 who are single so you’ll find that families stick to themselves and speak to nobody other than themselves making it a very exclusive and often unwelcoming culture. A tip; don’t ever mention to anyone that the culture isn’t very friendly in Norfolk as you will be met with anger and hate and the next thing they will ask is “Were you born here?”.

Generally the gentry open and run most of the shops here making it a very expensive place to eat, further dividing society as most of the locals can barely afford to eat in any of the restaurants other than Greg’s. As for work, the wages are often a lot lower than the rest of the UK and nepotism is rife here so if you are part of someone family you will probably get a job. Be very careful who you speak to as everyone knows everyone here and most are part of each others families. I thought it was a joke about “Inbred” before I moved here but it really is. You won’t be able to breathe!

As for the scenery, it’s dull, very flat and just depressing with days often being a complete white out and not so much as a cloud in the sky. There is a gorgeous beach full of seals but there’s only so many times you can visit it.

I’ve been here 10 years and thankfully leaving this year. I’ve looked at all of the data and it’s shows that people move here after divorce or from London making it a very exclusive, depressing and inbred culture. Everything about the culture being about women and children make it a very dull place for anyone else with very little to do that isn’t a family activity and even then I meet families that are bored and need more diversity and interesting people to speak to. Recently we even had a wife end her life in the river. The council have even constructed suicide barriers around St Andrews Car Park after men had been jumping of for years but a women jumped so they decided that they needed to do something to prevent more suicides.

I have an Airbnb and I’ve asked every single guest what they think of Norfolk and Norwich and not a single person in over a year said that they would want to live here due to the isolation from the rest of the UK and the fact that there is nothing to do.

Sadly, after ten years of trying to highlight the awful culture here that the wealthy ignore for their own gain I’ve given up and cannot wait to leave and join the many inclusive, kind, diverse and welcoming counties in the UK. I wouldn’t even move here with a family through fear that they too would become either pretentious and/or ignorant.

Manyandyoucanwalkover · 14/01/2024 00:03

Norfolk is truly lovely, especially north Norfolk. ❤️

Pappleapple · 14/01/2024 00:27

Oh and I haven’t even mentioned the transport situation! Good luck if you ever need a taxi after a night out. You won’t get one. The council refused u we as the locals like to keep things “local”. It’s been amazing writing this as it’s reminded me what a backward and sole-sucking place this is. If you are positive, happy and you have a fast pulse this is not a place for you.

Roiesin57 · 14/01/2024 00:36

Went on holiday to Cromer once, at the end of July. Lovely beach but everything closed up early. School holidays & this seaside town was deserted. At quarter to eight at night we were having trouble finding somewhere yo eat. Asked a local & he said "oh we don't do things like that round ere" it felt a very weird, deserted place for a seaside resort

MissersMercer · 14/01/2024 00:40

Go there numerous times a year. A previous poster said it's as if it's inbred, and I agree. People there are very odd. Not multicultural at all either. You feel like people are staring at you if you're not white.

Pappleapple · 14/01/2024 00:55

100% agree! I’m in the process of trying to get out. The lack of jobs, nepotism and awful wages keeps you here.

Noonesawme · 14/01/2024 00:57

Pappleapple · 14/01/2024 00:27

Oh and I haven’t even mentioned the transport situation! Good luck if you ever need a taxi after a night out. You won’t get one. The council refused u we as the locals like to keep things “local”. It’s been amazing writing this as it’s reminded me what a backward and sole-sucking place this is. If you are positive, happy and you have a fast pulse this is not a place for you.

With this much vitriol in your heart for a place you've spent the last decade of your life living, has it ever occurred to you that you might be the one with the problem? How incredibly sad to dedicate so much time somewhere you don't care about.

I live in Norfolk. Grew up just in the outskirts near Cambridgeshire, left at 18 to travel then go to uni and came back with my now husband to live in a beautiful village with a wonderful, supportive community, gorgeous countryside on our doorstep, whichever direction you head and here we raise our children to love and explore the world around them! We can even hear sealions and tigers in our back garden on occasion if the wind's blowing in the right direction and how many people can say that? I work for the mental health Trust so of course I'm more than aware of the extent of deprivation and social challenges across the county but I've worked for mental health Trusts all across the country and can assure you, Norfolk is no worse than anywhere else I have worked. Everywhere, and I do mean absolutely everywhere, has it's struggling areas; some places are just better at hiding it than others but that's not necessarily a good thing.

It's not for everyone, that is true but no one place is and some of the hate that Norfolk has been issued on this thread is excessive. It's a nice, relatively cheap part of the country with far better weather than it's western or northern counterparts and if a more relaxed, outdoor orientated way of life is what some people prefer, it's a lovely part of the country for that! The people are exactly the same as anywhere else; some are dubious but the vast majority are just normal, everyday people getting on with their lives and doing their best. And a few more are like the above poster who I'm not convinced would ever be happy anywhere and just wants to suck the life and joy out of a place, but not have the prerogative to actually just up and leave if it makes you that unhappy to be here because that would just be too sensible.

MimiDou · 14/01/2024 01:09

What about saying "we are very living X" so this topic doesn't beee to be brought up everyone we talk or see each other ?

SequentialAnalyst · 14/01/2024 01:26

Norwich is nice.
But when we visited relatives living elsewhere in Norfolk in winter, I have never ever been so cold!
Everywhere was flat, and the countryside around consisted of huge fields growing vegetables.

Pappleapple · 14/01/2024 01:53

No, I’m not the problem but your comment is something that people say when they don’t want to accept the truth. Norfolk is an awful place with an awful culture that only benefits the often privileged and ignorant few. I even checked myself by looking at the data. The data available shows what an exclusive and depressing place it is. I alone can’t cause a whole county to be exclusive, divided, backwards and depressing. Having lived in many places in the world I am confident in saying Norfolk is a mirror of everything that is wrong with the UK. Regarding your comment about leaving, had you read the entire post you would note that I am in the process of doing so and like many, I cannot wait.

Noonesawme · 14/01/2024 07:02

Pappleapple · 14/01/2024 01:53

No, I’m not the problem but your comment is something that people say when they don’t want to accept the truth. Norfolk is an awful place with an awful culture that only benefits the often privileged and ignorant few. I even checked myself by looking at the data. The data available shows what an exclusive and depressing place it is. I alone can’t cause a whole county to be exclusive, divided, backwards and depressing. Having lived in many places in the world I am confident in saying Norfolk is a mirror of everything that is wrong with the UK. Regarding your comment about leaving, had you read the entire post you would note that I am in the process of doing so and like many, I cannot wait.

Edited

I did read your thread. You've been here 10 years and now you're leaving. 10 years! You've spent a decade of your life somewhere you describe in such an awful way. That is on you love, not anyone else. And in my experience, is crap anyway. Norfolk has its issues but show me a place on the planet that doesn't! And that doesn't take away from the beauty it does have in both it's history, it's countryside and it's people. If you have spent 10 years surrounded in misery then more fool you. I grew up here and have lived here for nearly 10 years now myself and I love it and happily raise my children here. And so do a great great many of the nearly one million people who live here. Your vitriol for Norfolk is owned by you and sure, there're others who share your view but that's yours and theirs to own. It doesn't actually impact me at all or do anything to affect how I feel about a place I proudly call my home. So you carry on with feeling miserable about a place you chose to live for so long and I hope you find happiness in the next place you go.

Pappleapple · 14/01/2024 07:09

Your comment shows in clear detail the ignorance and selfishness of the people that live in Norfolk. Seek to understand before you tell people what they should or shouldn’t do or feel. Thank you. You really have shown everyone what Norfolk people are like and validated my experience and resulting comments. I came here to recover from a very serious injury. The recovery took around 7 years and I’ve been trying to get out of this ignorant and unsupportive place for 3 years. Many of my good friends have left after only being here a short while and you really are welcome to the place. The whole place only supports women a families, it’s awful. You know what they say; ignorance breeds ignorance.

inabubble3 · 14/01/2024 07:09

Hmmm. Love visiting Norfolk and it does seem beautiful but I can imagine it being very insular.

We’re from south east and have played with th idea of moving because of our vice visiting. Seems to be a lot more house for the money to be said for that? Maybe people feel like they’ve got a better quality of life?

Maybe people aren’t 100% on their decision so they’re trying to justify it out loud?

Pappleapple · 14/01/2024 07:11

80% of the people on this post commenting that Norfolk is awful and I think it would be foolish to ignore it. I had a chat with one of the gentry in Eaton Park today and even she said how nobody speaks to each other and that it’s an isolated and lonely place. Thanks

poopoolala · 14/01/2024 07:13

It's Cheap ! I'd love to live there but committed to schools here .

For the value of my house I could get a farm in Norfolk and a huge house ..

I'd say it's mostly the house prices but maybe people are too proud to say that .

It's a nice place though , very calm and peaceful although Great Yarmouth was very run down .

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