I’d think it was a joke of a man came on to me now

[Turnthatcrapdown]

Anyone else feel like that?

I'm 44, couple of stone overweight, not horrendous, but definitely don’t turn heads anymore. It seems so long since any man glanced twice at me, not that I go out to places where they would etc, but still.
Not saying I want them to either, I’m married and have a young dd. It's just I would honestly be gobsmacked if someone did…I think I started feeling that at around 38/39.
Do you get looked at/chatted up around this age?

*IF would so love an edit button 🤷🏻‍♀️

Nope. I’m always amazed at how many people on here get chatted up.

I never really did when I was young, but now? No chance.

You are just putting yourself down for whatever reason, and just being unkind to yourself. You are in a relationship and have a daughter. Stop feeling sorry for yourself!

@Keyansier I’m not 🙈🤣I was just observing really and wondering if it was an age thing or something the guys don’t do when older as much too.

I've become completely invisible

I'm 36 and feel that way. Tbh it's my own choice if that makes sense? I dress for comfort/practicality, I work outside a lot, I walk the dogs a lot, I don't see the point in putting make up on or making an effort with my hair when the wind and rain will just undo my work. On the flip side though, I can't remember the last time I looked at a man and thought, yep he's nice so it really isn't something that is on my radar at all. I'm sure if I wanted to attract a man I could manage something but because I barely even notice men I can't blame them for not noticing me!

Yes I did in my 40's but not now. I love it actually - it's very liberating knowing people aren't interested when you walk in somewhere.

I had this. I’m several stone overweight and close in age to you. When I became single it was more like 7 stone overweight! When I got on the dating apps I didn’t really expect any interest. I’ve been quite surprised to find some men interested from the apps but also some in real life! Been on some dates and had a good time. Amazing chemistry with one guy! Nothing has lasted but yeah, I thought maybe only guys with a thing for “bigger” women would be interested but that doesn’t seem to be the case.
I’ve been eating well and going to the gym so I’m a lot more toned and I’m finding my self-confidence again. I walk taller now, I’m not super smug or anything but I feel good and I’ve noticed I’m getting more attention. I think it’s a lot more about my self-confidence and enjoying life whereas before I was sad and withdrawn. Only dodgy blokes fancy women who look like that! 🙄

@OnceYouKPop Does it bother you? How old are you?

Im in my 40's and get chatted up. I actually, rather embarassingly, recently thought a man who had come over to me (he was wearing a shirt and waistcoat in my defence) was barstaff. He came over and asked me what I would like to drink and straight away I replied 'oh thanks we have already ordered' and he looked strangely at me and kept standing there and then realisation dawned on him and he said 'I do not work here, I was offering to buy you a drink'. I was mortified and impressed at his balls in equal measures. I did not take the drink though. Other half may not have approved. Good for the soul though.

@ThisWormHasTurned Thats true, I suppose a lot is down to what you give out…harassed, no make up wearing mum of a 5 year old, probably isn’t giving off the right vibes 😂

@Foolsandtheirmoney Yes, that’s true, I’m definitely not making the effort these days at all and am not bothered, it was just something that sort of crept up on me though…one minute a few glances at 38 on holidays etc (with Dh) now…nothing at all for years..

@Igglepiggleslittletoe Ahh that’s lovely 😊 you see, that’s what I mean, if that were ever to happen now, highly unlikely, I’d think it was a dare or something 😅

I work with the elderly, so it still happens a lot…. Sometimes I get “if I was 10 years younger” from a 96 year old! I’m 44, and also 2 stone heavier than I’d like.

@DuncanBiscuits I wonder if it’s also the situations we put ourselves in though too? Would it be different if going out to bars with a group of girlfriends? It’s been so long, now it’s all lunch play dates…nothing is about men

@FabFitFifties It’s quite a change though isn’t it

Now I will say it must be to do with confidence as I was single and still looked the same for over a decade before I met my other half and had nobody chatting me up but I am seeing a lot of heads turning these days. Yes I dress better now but I think it is something inside that is radiating out too. I look more confident and have a glow about me now that I am in love again :)

@Howmanysleepsnow Aww 😂It’s all relative I guess, that’s sweet

@Igglepiggleslittletoe Nice 💜

Oh, I hear you, OP. I’ve fallen for a friend who hasn’t even noticed I’m female, and has certainly never considered me in a sexual light, and it makes me feel like a tiny figure seen through the wrong end of a telescope. It’s not his fault, but it’s having a bad effect on me and my confidence, plus I’ve been celibate forever.

Forties, and yep, completely invisible. I quite like it, in a way, that the pressure is off, but I do wonder at women my age who still make all the effort, in that more self consciously 'here I am fellas' way, how they can be bothered! (I don't really know how to explain it, but it's a slightly different way of presenting yourself to when you're doing it more for you).

Used to get loads of attention, but it definitely tailed off in my late thirties.

It's not something I think about and I always hating random strangers chatting me up so I welcome not attracting men. I mean I think I'm attractive now so I'm in no way down on myself but I don't care about how I look to others anymore (thank god). I'm also 44 and overweight but I doubt that's why I don't get approached anymore - I assume it's because I'm older and also I don't really go to places like bars etc. As long as DH still fancies me I don't give a crap!

I do get quite a bit of male attention from “randoms” but never seem to manage to get it /spot it from the men I actually like!

It only takes one…

@Speedweed Weird isn’t it, yes I also can’t really be arsed, so that may have a lot to do with it 🤣
But I was wondering if men older than us for example still look at women our age and so on.

@Divilment Hope he notices you soon!