***********TO WANT A POSITIVE BIRTH THREAD?**************

[auntilin]

I'm sick to death of all the negative spin!

Giving birth is the most natural thing in the world, its what we were made for...

As you said on that thread "I am so glad i can 'talk' on here. It means alot.."

Well, it means a lot that other women talk about their problems be it mental, physical, relationship wise etc.

Why do you feel other woman less worthy than you to post and get support on here.

Being smug because you happened by luck of the draw to have a great birth, is just sad.

God what an awful thread all around.

Agree with hunker.

Fio said 'Alot of people are completely unprepared for the worst case scenario and it helps to know you are not alone and not some freak of nature or a failure'

So true. Having had 3 rather great c-sections I thought a normal birth wouuld be marvellous and couldn't wait to tell my positive homebirth story with us in bed cuddling the baby.
Felt like the lone freak when it went wrong and dd was hideously brain damaged. No support and everyone else apprently having beautiful experiences.
But wait, here's me being negative about ending up with a brain damaged baby. Gosh, I reckon I should see it as a gift. After all, we get a Blue Badge

and DLA NMC dont forgetthe DLA...i mean how selfish is that!!

As soon as you're pregnant everyone wants to share their horror birth experience with u. I don't think this is because people want you to feel afraid but more because quite often, they are still coping with it themselves and want someone to talk to it about it..
I didn't have an easy labour (19 hrs, induced, back on back, cord round neck twice etc...) but i would say that giving birth made me feel sooo powerful and despite not having that rush of love (actually really wanted some toast more than anything...) I think I enjoyed it (in a weird sort of way - maybe my memory is failing me over 2 years later!)

P.S. Didn't read all the messages on this board but just a few here and there.
Needmorecoffee I would agree too. I think so many people have unrealistic expections...

Clicked post by accident...My SIL was born without a thyroid gland and it took them months to realise. She was the first born 40 years a go and my MIL felt unsupported... a baby who was tiny, who would need feed and slept all the time whilst everone else had picture perfect babies. I can only imagine how difficult it must have been for it. Now my SIL and MIL still live together and you can really feel the love between them and how much they enjoy each others company...esp since my FIL died. All of this isn't very relevant but I think it's an important point that you're raising

Isn't it about time for the ole cliche 'Well, what's the problem you have a baby at the end of it?'

or " yes it was a bit crap but once baby arrived i bet you forgot all about the pain"

have a positive birth thread ifyou want - buy insense and a birthing pool, get your tambourines out and do a chant

but dont fuckin ask if you are being unreasonable

and then cry like a bitch is someone says " yes you are"

Someone once wrote (sometime, somewhere - I can't remember) that a woman is rarely closer to death than during pregnancy and birth. What's so great about childbirth being natural? Like others have said, many terrible things are "natural" - it doesn't stop them being cruel and violent.

Human childbirth appears to me to be one of the most flawed processes in nature and seems to be the result of over-evolution. There aren't many other animals that have to give birth years before the foetus is actually mature enough to move around because otherwise the birth would be physically impossible.

I think we are so desensitised to the natural way of things that we are in danger of becoming completely blasee about the risks involved to the life of mother and baby.

Anyone who even implies that childbirth is a relatively easy, natural process that we should enjoy and be grateful for is living in cloud cuckoo land.

Custardo

been reading this thread and have to say, you have made me chuckle.

I had a shit birth, had preecampsia, had a fit, escopsipy, and forceps. Put me off for life.

If i want to grumble i will

Sorry, that should have been months, not years. And I do like the way you've embraced the namechange Custy!

it was dh's idea

Well, I had a traumatic, medicalised birth with DS1 that was one push away from a c-section. He is fine.

With DS2 I was 10cm by the time I got to hospital, and just had gas and air.

He is the one with all the problems.

It's my experience that the birth in the scheme of things is not the be-all and end all, DS1 should have had the problems that DS2 has (even though DS2 did have a "natural" birth).

Ah birth.
You plan and prepare - then you hand yourselves (you and baby) over to the gods and hope!

I've had one great experience preceded by one considerably less than great one.