To think I wouldn’t ask for money?

[Illbeindenial]

I’m visiting my cousin in Paris next weekend and she’s messaged me to say I’ll need to make a money contribution for my stay

I get there Friday evening and leave Sunday and I’ll be sleeping on the sofa. I get it’s a touristy city but I am going to see her, I’m not staying there and going off to see other people or go to an event.

I don’t know, I just personally wouldn’t charge a family member to stay for such a short time.

Are her what she was thinking …. Hotel could be cheaper! She’s a cf.

No, I wouldn’t charge a friend or family member who was staying over, even if they weren’t specifically staying to see me.

I’d just find a reasonably priced hotel and stay there if I was you.

I would never charge family for staying with us for 2 days however it would be kind of them to offer to pay for a meal out.

Did she invite you ?

If she did and is now asking for money, I'd find a hotel.

Depends on the circumstances - if she's a skint student asking for a small contribution towards bills/food, fair enough.

If she is a well-off professional asking for a hundred quid a night, that's unreasonable.

I guess you either pay up or stay elsewhere.

It depends. We don't know you or her. Are you typically a freeloader and is she struggling? (It could be no btw, I'm just pointing out that we don't know).

Does she ever come to you? If not, I think it's fair, IF, she makes a contribution towards your travel costs.

How much is she asking you for? What is her financial situation?

She asked for the co tribute on so maybe she should say what she is expecting.

I wouldn't pay to sleep on someone's sofa. Find a hotel.

I wouldn't. I would buy dinner/take some treats. I have only asked for a contribution when my cousin stayed for 5 months, when she moved countries.
Anything up to about 3 or 4 weeks, I don't think I would.
But, I wouldn't invite anyone I suspected as a freeloader!

Tell her you've Covid, and can't travel.

I wouldn't pay to sleep on a settee. Find a hotel.

I’d be tempted to tell her that I could book an Airbnb and get a real bed if I was paying, so I’d cancel my visit or I’d book ‘proper’ bed but there’s no way I’d pay to doss down on a lumpy sofa at a family members home.

Christ my cousin is coming to stay for a month in December, I haven't even thought to expect money in return. Maybe I'm missing a trick....

And you wonder why people avoid you like the plague? Jesus.

Please explain why you jumped to that conclusion from the OP’s short post?

I would never ask either!

She is being mean. You just don't ask for financial contributions from someone close to you who will bunk down on the sofa for a couple of nights. Does she not want you to visit? Or does she have a boyfriend who is pulling her strings?

Oh piss off 🙄 who charges a relative to bunk their sofa?
mumsnet is like another planet sometimes.

Eh ?

I think it depends on a number of things. Did your cousin invite you? are you normally close and how often do you visit her?
If you’re always going to Paris and using her place as cheap accommodation, feeding, etc, I can see why she’ll want to start discouraging the visits.

I'd be asking for £1000 upfront. What a CF.

It could be on but It depends on what she is specifically asking a contribution for and her circumstances. We’re you expecting her to pay for everything for the whole weekend including food etc?