Dad hitting his child on the way to school

[Mingmoo]

I’m really upset by something I saw on the way home from the school run this morning. I was on foot and quite late and I’d dropped my DS off. About three minutes down the road I saw a man getting out of his car with a little boy in the school uniform, maybe year one but not older than that, and I was looking at them and thinking they’d be late and wondering why they’d parked so far from the gate. The man started walking towards school and called the boy, who wandered in the other direction. When the man realised he ran back shouting at him, grabbed him by the arm, hauled him almost off his feet, hit him two very heavy whacks across the bum that lifted him onto his tiptoes and then dragged him past me, telling him off. The boy was crying and hitting at him. Obviously I didn’t take in much about their appearance or car until it was too late so I don’t know anything else about them but should I have said something? My DM used to slap me and I can’t bear to see children being physically disciplined. I thought the boy drifting off was his dad’s fault, and that possibly he had SEN because he seemed lost in his own world, so maybe it’s something they struggle with. I just found it very shocking and I feel I let the boy down by not saying something.

AIBU to intervene next time if I see them in the same situation again?

Ring the school.

Don't confront the dad. Speak to the school safeguarding lead.

Are you in Scotland? If this happened in Scotland, then who ever saw it would have gone straight to the school to let them know. We take it seriously when we see a kid being hit and so do the schools.

In the town in I'm, someone was seen hitting their child on the school run and 3 different people went into the office to report it. Of course, there was school gate gossip about it later.

But I think you're still allowed to hit children in England? So it this was england then I guess going to report it right away isnt the done thing.

Obviously tell school!!!

Phone the school and let them know what you saw. At least then it's documented.

If you see them again try and get the reg number/ a better description.

You are being unreasonable not to have dealt with it immediately.Phone the school.

Call the safeguarding lead at the school. Today. If he does that in public he could be doing a lot worse at home.

If you call the school they can probably narrow it down and identify the child based on them being late. Definitely report it to the school.

You knew what you saw was horrible and wrong so tell the school.

The majority of people seeing this would be shocked and horrified. I don't think it's against the law though (in England) and if you started a thread on smacking there would be a handful of people who will admit to doing it.

Tell the school. Do you remember what the child was wearing? You witnessed abuse OP and need to tell someone about it. Phone the police and tell them where the car was parked and what time it was. They may be able to look at any CCTV.

I had no idea that hitting a child is legal in England! That's horrific

@TrippyLily
I think they have some ridiculous rule like, you cant leave a mark so as long as the hitting doesn't leave any bruise then you're good to go on with it.

I know it took a long time for scotland to finally make it completely illegal but it's been years now and England still allow hitting children. Which is probably why the OP didnt go and tell the school. It's still seen as just a bit of smacking. In Scotland (in my experience), no one would have just carried on walking home if they saw that.

Report it to school.
They will almost certainly be able to identify the child - dropped off late by Dad, lower school. It may be something they are aware of, but extra information always helps.
Don't expect to hear a response from school other than "thank you for your message".

Report to school.

You must report that to the school as soon as possible.

Ring the school describe the dad , tell them rough time you saw it , they will work it out -late kid / upset .
I have lived twice by 2 schools that my kids didn't go to and i have done this twice in similar circumstances to yours , or if you manage to get his number plate this week call ss.

That's horrific. My first thought is that a black child could therefore be hit much harder than a white child as it is harder to leave a mark! I'm black and even if I have a bruise it's hard to see sometimes! How bizarre.

The poor little love its heartbreaking, if he does that out in public god forbid what happens behind closed doors 😞

I think you’re correct in not confronting the dad, but I do think you should speak to the school.

I even say this as a parent who from the outside might have been one that could have looked as though I was being rough with my son (he had school refusal and huge tantrums on the way to school for months and I had to drag/carry with him hitting me/restrain him to get there).

Sometimes things that look rough can be explained, other times they need urgent action. The school is in the best position to know what the situation is and deal with it.

I know it’s extreme, but how would you feel if something terrible happened?

Tell the school, they will be able to work out who it is by the time.

I saw a little girl of about two or three with her parents when I was 16. The whack she received knocked her off her feet. I didn't know what to do so didn't do anything and I still think about it twenty years later. I hope that someone else did help this little girl.

Speak to the school. They'll know who came in late and crying. They may do nothing but it shoots be recorded in case other things are seen/reported that can build a bigger picture

I’d phone the school and pass it onto them.

Another voice for raising this with school. They will likely be able to identify the child if they came in late and were clearly distressed. (As an aside it's also illegal to smack children in Wales now, thank goodness).