Do you think some people just aren't competent and won't fit into any 2022 workplace?

[majellalos]

The skills that are required in so many professions these days don’t come easily or naturally to everyone and most jobs require a fairly advanced level of technological talent and a certain set of social skills that don’t come easily to everyone.

I really am not good at anything and despite being University educated I've struggled to hold down jobs because of performance issues in many jobs since I was 17. I'm 40 now and off ill but before that was doing temp work and agency jobs but just never felt right in any workplace. I'd always make a mess somehow or say the wrong thing.

AIBU to think some folk just aren't made for the workplace?

thank you ❤️ I am having counselling and on medication. I think more people need to hear they are not old as I keep telling myself. You are only old when you are dead

The thing that worries me is that people are not learning how to be resilient any more. It isn't possible to go through life without experiencing shit times. Difficult jobs. Crap bosses. People you love dying. Money worries. Unexpected ill health. All of these things happen to most people to some degree. Sometimes you just have to push through. It's not easy, but you can't just opt out.

I think this is Blair's legacy coming home to roost a liitle bit, I am late 40's and have had to work from the ground up in IT dev and now out earn a lot of my friends who went to uni.

Being ealry 40's and feeling the mid life crisis is a thing, thinking that because you have a degree means you should be further in your career is along the same lines of thinking you have the correct political/economic opinions because you did an MA on 'unrelated subject' because of 'critical thinking'

Blair was praised for wanting 50% to go to uni, slippery slope argument is a right wing conspiracy, so degree educated jobs have become somewhat laugable.

It is part of being a blair baby

This is a great post. At a similar age I was working temp office jobs & evening bar work having partied for most of my 20s earning basically minimum wage

13 years on my life is totally different. I have a career in something I never would have thought of, I'm good at it. I don't earn spectacular wages but it's more than enough for a good life. I eventually finished my degree and now I'm going to apply for a conversion masters so I can train for a new career in my 40s.

Yeah some people sorted their career out when they were 20 and now earn shitloads or are CEOs or own a business or something. But most people have hiccups or a hiatus or take a while to work out what they're good at.

There's no shame in being 28 or even 35 or 40 and not having a career path. We're gonna be working till we're 70 so it's not like you're short of time to figure it out! If I realised at 28 how young I actually was I wouldn't have been feeling shame for not having achieved much. I look back now and realise what a waste of effort it is feeling like I didn't match up to society's expectations.

Before I had kids I felt confident in my abilities in the work place and happily held down a job with quite a lot of pressure. After kids I’m hopeless at everything, there’s no way I could handle the stress of my old job. I’ve retrained for something I really wanted to do but i’m pretty hopeless at it. I’ve had a few jobs in the sector now and I’ve struggled with them all, its embarrassing being so hopeless at everything. I’m not sure how to move forward in my life now to be honest.

Lol love it

@XenoBitch What is your plan? I bet it wouldn't be against MN guidelines!

Seriously, I fear I am in that position. I do have some skills, but I have CPTSD from severe childhood trauma (think most severe you can get). My executive function is shit, despite decades of therapies.

I always worked at physical jobs, cleaning etc, because I could do them. Now I cannot because I have gynae issues and can no longer lift or be on my feet all day.

I am studying now, but no idea how I will be in the workplace. I am exhausted by 1 day of people-ing.

All these people saying oh well 'they' will just have to pull themselves up by their bootstraps, there shouldn't be a benefits system etc .. that won't happen that people will suddenly be 'cured' because of your ideology. Poor and marginalised people will just starve, or be in severe victorian-style poverty if they don't have family to support them. It's extremely paternalistic and nasty to assume people in these situations just 'don't try hard enough'.

I could have written this. I’m a former senior civil servant. I left because I couldn’t stand my colleagues’ incompetence and utter lack of desire to make anything at all happen. In case they had to, you know, think or work hard. I think that the public sector partly exists as a lame duck sanctuary for useless people, to keep them off the streets and pay them enough to get them spending money to keep the economy going. There are some good people there, of course. I feel sorry for them.

😢

Yes, I definitely think those first couple of months are back breaking. I get so stressed and I find in 99% of menial jobs the training is so so poor and you’re expected to just instantly ‘know’ how to do things, which aren’t properly explained to you. And then you end up feeling stupid when in fact you just don’t know exactly how they process deliveries in a specific shop you’ve never worked in. And there’s usually just no support or infrastructure to help new starters so they go into their new job feeling confident and not left open and vulnerable.

And in answer to the ‘why haven’t you just retrained’ I AM retraining! People on mumsnet often say ‘retrain’ as if it’s a little thing you do in a weekend. It takes years, and believe it or not actually adds massively to your stress. And while you’re retraining you do still need to eat and pay rent etc.

But I think op is right. Some people struggle badly in the workplace and have trouble adjusting to new jobs, learning new things etc. It doesn’t mean they’re all lazy slackers using it as an excuse to be on benefits as has been suggested. Loads of us DO work. I have almost always worked, and I’m proud of that and find it very necessary. I just often find it very hard.

Plus, often in menial minimum wage jobs, I find I get a sense of dread where the job permeates my off time, so I’ll struggle to sleep/won’t be able to relax at weekends etc because I’m just worried about work. Especially the first few weeks. I do get on with it because I need to work, but I hate it. I think we work far too much for much too little. It takes over so much of life.

I’m aghast at the range of social skills I see in the office. I’m sure most people don’t really like each other that much and hate being there. It always seems really fake to me. Like a big fake game of playing pleasantries and professionalism.

If you drive, delivery driver jobs like AmazonFlex or Yodel don't require either an interview or a CV.

I feel like this. I'm ok with technology but I can't concentrate if I have to be social as well. Or if the job is all about interacting with people, that's fine, but I won't be able to go and do paperwork afterwards.

Covid has really given me a pass as I can hide behind WFH but even teams calls feel distracting and throw me off. I guess because I'm autistic they tire me out and I can't get in the right headspace to work properly. I can't switch between things easily.

I wish it was acceptable for me to just be competent, and not likable and involved as well. I recognise I'm the outlier in most workplaces however.

Nooooo, really? People don’t like being at their workplace? I can’t believe that, surely not…

Come on! Of course many people dislike their workplace. How many people do you think would win the euro millions and decide to keep on working? Nobody, or the tiny tiny minority. Most people work because they have to, not because they enjoy it.

I hope @XenoBitch plan, if the safety net is removed, isn't what I think it is.

@palygold I just realised that I should not have asked, as it may be triggering to that poster and to others. I really didn't realise what it could be, until you posted, I am sorry xx. I thought other things like crime.

It's a disgrace that some people advocate for the safety net to be removed.

Honestly, like the above posters said, the vast majority of people hate working and would rather not work. I actually probably only know one person among my family/friends who is genuinely into his job. But unfortunately we all have to work to pay the bills. There is no secret formula to it. People just get through the day to get paid.

I enjoy someone who I really feel would struggle in many workplaces. He’s autistic, he has minimal social skills, can’t really self start, is vaguely unkempt and needs to have everything set out for him extremely clearly. We originally took him on as his brother worked for us.
However, he’s worked for us for over 25 years, he works in our stores, manufacturing and picking/packing. We’ve just learned to work with his foibles, so we’re super clear with what we need him to do, and honestly, don’t expect the moon from him.
I feel really responsible for him as I just can’t imagine how he could ever get a job anywhere else as he couldn’t even handle an interview, but because of this job he owns his own home and has a nice life. I’m sure we could employ someone “better” but I actually feel that part of my responsibility as a business owner isn’t just to make as much money as possible.

Enjoy = employ

You are just in the wrong career! I found my career at 40! Retrain and find what you're good at

Come on! Of course many people dislike their workplace. How many people do you think would win the euro millions and decide to keep on working? Nobody, or the tiny tiny minority. Most people work because they have to, not because they enjoy it.

I know! That’s what I meant basically. I’m marvelling at the way most people seem to cover it up. I’m sure I just look like I don’t want to be there.

I think theres a shit load of people out there, in work and out of it, who are not well suited to the modern work-place, yeah.

The modern work place however is often a pretty toxic environment, demanding more from people than they should give to their home/personal lives, whilst offering little to no support.

I am absolutely unsuited to the workplace, I have never held down a 'proper' ie, employed, somewhere outside of my home, regular salaried job.

When I was younger I wasn't attractive enough, I was too qualified but not experienced, or too qualified and liable to be bored, or just not the right fit... I got some interviews, I never once got the job, out of hundreds, thousands probably, of applications.

My mental health fell over, and then my disabilities were DX and became obvious to people other than me and started to affect my mobility, so now I am too qualified for some things, not nearly enough qualified for others, have no workplace experience AND no employer in their right mind would employee me (I certainly wouldn't!) because my health means I am unreliable in terms of output and actually showing up. I would also need a bunch of accomodations making for me that another employer would not need.

So now I am still unsuited to the workplace.

I still earn a living, I just work for myself and do a range of things that keeps my jumpy little ADHD brain happy and shuts up the brain-weasels so I don't go totally nuts!

But there are loads of reasons why people aren't suited and it isn't anything to do with 'lack of resilience' or 'inability to suck it up' or 'well I hate going to work I don't see why I have to and you don't'...

The modern world we live in is far too mentally demanding, we're NEVER off duty now, it is incredibly stressful - for many people who 40 years ago were just about able to manage, the current way of life and expectations from employers is just too much... and that is why the huge rise in mental health diagnosis, time off work for them, long term sickness issues.

We've also got rid of a ton of jobs that were better suited to folk like me, and other folk who struggle now - so much manufacturing, construction, engineering etc happens overseas. So many 'lifestyle jobs' where job and life were not seperated (bargees, HGV driving is going the same way, farm labour work, shepherding..) are dying out, streamlined, sent over seas... and there go the opportunities for folk better suited to such endeavours.

Unsuited to the workplace does not mean lazy, unskilled, useless, low standards etc, it can mean square peg and round hole!

What are the great careers/work areas for people with ADHD and ND people that are suggested, please?

Thank you to the employer who employs her colleague’s brother. I was so happy to see that. It’s exactly what workplaces should be: inclusive and flexible enough, in enough job roles such that having a certain level of challenges or quirks do not disbar a whole section of society from being able to make a contribution, because there are a lot of useful things that they can bring in the right environment. We all know that having work and being able to be employed gives people independence, dignity and feeling of purposefulness beyond the obvious financial benefits.

Being an employer is not only about making money, that’s an unsustainable employment approach unless there’s a limitless supply of people innately able to do the job you need with no training or investment. In which case you’d be vastly under-using the potential talents or skills of your workers, and your business will suffer long term.

That Victorian mill owners’ approach is partly why we have such a low-skill, low-wage economy and low productivity and growth in the UK. It is a really wasteful and shameful approach to your own role as an employer or as someone running a business.

My dad ran his own business in Scotland in the 80s. There was a local charity that arranged free workplaces for people struggling to get in the workplace. My dad ran a wholesale business so needed people to make the tea, sweep the floor, pack orders, answer phone calls, right up to selling and accounts. So a real mix.

he took in many, many placements. The one I remember most was a young guy from school who basically couldn’t speak. I’m not sure if it was painful shyness or something else as this was the 80s. He had quite an odd demeanour and I think couldn’t get a job anywhere. He basically was opening boxes and making tea on his placement. Dad noticed his potential and kept him on as an employee. It took a fair few years - but he thrived. He was doing quite senior roles by the time dad retired and then he went to work somewhere else and remained senior - managing places.

this guy would have been unsuitable for “normal” office work and just needed a chance. somewhere. I think if him a lot with real happiness that he got that and had a successful career

maybe OP modern office work isn’t right for you but what about something else?

The point about social skills lacking in some people, or just being such they annoy others, is one I agree with. One of the benefits of hybrid working is the reduced amount of such interactions.