WFH with children

[Annie232]

On many threads I hear women pop up and mention how they WFH x number of days and so don't need childcare on x number of days. Incidentally, within my NCT group on discussions on return to work a few of the women have said similar and that they plan to WFH 1/2 days a week and therefore save on childcare. Is this a thing now?

The thing I wonder about is what happens when the CEO's office says to you, he/she wants to talk to you at 10, do you just say "oh sorry that clashes with baby sensory" or do you take the call with your child around or .... something else?

It seems like most people in senior roles occasionally need to talk to very senior people, no?

nobody forces you to have children if you can't afford to pay for them.

Maybe should have considered the cost of childcare to enable you to work before getting up the duff op?

Oh you are finally back with us OP and that’s what you have taken from this thread?

Wow you are unreasonable. Most people take childcare costs in before deciding to have a child. Unless you are in one of these magical full time but only work 2 hours a day jobs, you and your employer are going to clash pretty soon

I think the other thing I wonder about with the people who do 2 hours work a day for big bucks is - if the employer is genuinely happy with that in return for their skills, why wouldn't you negotiate it as an official working pattern? It would be amazing to have it locked down and guaranteed, I would have thought

You aren't listening are you OP?

I've had to give someone in my team a warning about working with her toddler's in the house with no other adult, after she posted a picture on Facebook of them playing in front of her laptop. How can you be giving your work your full attention if you are looking after toddler's I couldn't concentrate on the TV with mine in the same room at that age.

Employers will stop granting wfh to people and then there will be no option other than childcare. People should really consider this before they have children.

I would have loved to have more children but the cost of childcare limited that.

Babies of 0-4 months are probably easiest to work around as they do very little at this stage, feed and sleep (in theory!) But once they are on the move you have to constantly have an eye on them for falls, putting things in their mouth etc and you cannot do that if you are working. Sorry OP you jusy can't. And anyone saying they are going off to baby classes etc clearly doesn't have a full time job and is not answerable to anyone so it isn't comparable to most peoples circumstances.

And if I found out that some of my team were wfh and minding babies or toddlers other than due to illness/once off reason etc I would be giving them a warning and if it continued then I would revoke their wfh privilege

I suspect someone in my team is looking after his toddler son during working hours.

My employer is very pretty flexible and I pick my 10yr old up from school twice a week using my lunch hour but the rest of the week she is in after school club because I think it's unreasonable to not be able to attend meetings 5 days a week from 2.45 to 3.30pm!

As for paying for childcare. It's just one of those things you have to suck up OP. At one point we were paying £1500 a month when both our DC were under 5. Twice the cost of our mortgage and we're not high earners by any means.

Well, that's part of having children. They're not free.

Hat are you on about I got 2 promotions in 4 years while working from home half of the time with children at home . I’ve worked for them for over 10 years so they know my park capabilities very well . I agree nit all jobs can be done but doing a blunt statement like that is unfair

I’m a lawyer in the public sector and it’s absolutely rife.

It’s not possible with small moving children to wfh where you are taking client calls or zoom meetings. These mums haven’t tried it yet and their smugness may be replaced when reality hits that their child is screaming in background. I do babysitting for people working from home and trying to keep them out of the room parent is working in is a nightmare! So without another adult it’s hard.

I’m doing a brilliant job , as I said I just got promoted and there where 3 others up for that position , the baby loves being a other me and dad and there is no way she would have more attention in a nursery . It’s all about organisation , I got up at 6 and have 4 hours child free as everyone including all kids are asleep , I do 2 hours when my partner is home ( normally all phone calls and things I need to be completely concentrated , then I spread the rest over the day so 2 hours from 8 am to 7 pm is far from impossible , it allows me plenty of time to reply to email , organise work for my team and fill up what I need when she naps or is playing . I did it with 2 kids at home during covid . He dia free nit all jobs will be conducive to work this way but mine is and it’s brilliant .

You do realise no job is only zoom meetings right ? I tend to place all my zoom meeting calls on the same day when the partner is home and just go in the office a few hours .

Speak for yourself, it's all we seem to bloody do.

Then they may find their employer is forced to sack them.

quite frankly WFH with a baby or toddler is impossible and unfair on both your employer and your child. I barely survive WFH when my child is sent home from nursery sick and is just sat watching tv…the endless need for attention, snacks etc does not make for productive working and they need your attention too. My partner and I do 4 days work each to do 3 days of childcare only. I work condensed hours and we both try to make up time in evenings and weekends if needed. 3 days childcare is all the government 20% subsidy covers so we don’t do more than that.

I’m curious was it like this before covid ? We went through a trend of doing lots of zooms calls and it’s covid and then suddenly all realised there were not needed as often . I still have a few a week with my team and the senior management but thankfully they realised so many as before was just wasting our time . I hope it eases for you .

Do you mean you do this yourself or you have noticed others do it? What is the impact?

No, I don’t do it - I don’t have kids.

It’s a hangover from COVID when everyone with kids got their hours but not pay reduced. The majority of women in my department wfh with kids. They are awol when the schools runs are happening (for the older kids) so that’s predictable, but otherwise they’re just not contactable - you call them, no answer, because they’re doing something with the kid that’s there.

If you ask them to attend a meeting at any other time, you get “can we do X as it’s Bobby’s nap time then?” - and the kids all have different nap times so scheduling is a nightmare. We get kids appearing in team meetings still too.

They don’t catch up at other times as there’s “nothing to do” (because any collaborative work needed doing during the day). Our clients know who’s reliable and who’s not so they specifically avoid asking for those who aren’t, so our caseload is larger.

Those without kids / with adult kids are thoroughly fed up picking up the slack but management can’t be arsed to sort it and just keep threatening to remove wfh altogether.

I feel for the general public we’re supposed to be serving.

It’s amazing you have this much control over others availability. It would be impossible for me to have all my meetings in one day. And to be honest I wouldn’t allow anyone in my team to do this. Business need has to dictate when meetings happen, not domestic requirements (unless there is an emergency).

I have noticed that meetings are now starting to happen in person more frequently - which is great. People concentrate much more when we are all in the room together - and you get some side conversations before and after meetings.

zoom / teams meeting still happen - but really only for people who aren’t within travelling distance. So I don’t have to fly to other countries or cities as much which is great:

I have WFH for the last 5 years, since my eldest two were 6 & 8 and didn't use childcare in the holidays.
BUT I only work for two hours a day and can do it in dibs and drabs.
If I was client facing there is no way I could have done this.

I'm currently on maternity leave with DC3 and DP is labouring under the misapprehension that because he's a good/easy baby that I'll be able to work from home and look after him at the same time.

Absolutely no chance.

Tbh is plp are able to do this and their children are being well looked after them seriously more power to them. I think nurseries /crèches are just grim for under 3’s and this is based on a year out of uni working in a few , just awful, despite parents thinking their kids loved them , the didn’t… but as plp with no family support o totally understand how parents have to use them. I think parents are being v v short changed by them and their dcs are not getting the care they need at that age tbh . My dh and I had dcs relatively young and close together, we had no family support but managed to both do sahp while working / doing post grads, it wasn’t easy but pre kids we both agreed the person who earned the most would fund the other to be with our dcs in the v early years. It worked out for us , have our own house , both back working in career jobs but we we’re definitely strapped for cash when we had them at first but had the luxury of time. Now they are older we can both wfh with school and afterschool.
I am totally fascinated that plp can do this with toddlers though… I couldn’t turn my back for 5 seconds with any of mine so I’m guessing most plp doing this aren’t working ft, have only one child , have grandparents/support they aren’t mentioning tbh….

Apologies for typos !!