Eating with a knife and fork in the wrong hands

[Getabloominmoveon]

Just sat in a cafe next to a whole family eating with their fork in the right hand and knife in the left. On the other side a young guy was struggling to chop up his food with just a fork. A few weeks ago an adult friend of mine admitted she didn’t know which way to set a table.This is In the UK btw.

When did this start? Have they never eaten with a table set with cutlery? Don’t people teach their kids how to eat properly any more?

At the risk of sounding like Hyacinth Bouquet AIBU to think that this is a basic life skill and people should eat with their cutlery in the right hands (unless left-handed, different cultures, Americans and all the other caveats of course).

On a previous table manners thread (mn seems to love them) there was a poster who said that her son with special needs struggled to hold a knife and fork in yhe way she deemed correct, so she trained him (yes trained was the word she repeatedly used, like he's a dog) by continually "correcting" him until he did it "properly" despite the poor child finding it very difficult. She also said that all children with special needs could do this if their parents "trained" them properly. It was fucked up and I feel sorry for that poor child.

@JennyNotFromTheBlock I took your advice and went to “educate myself” and guess what?? I am correct. Ive attached a couple of links for you so that you can “educate yourself”. You’re welcome.
handed eating //blog.anything left handed.co.uk
www.wikihow.com how to use a fork and knife

If you do things with your left hand, and it's more dominant, why would you wield something with your right hand? That makes no sense at all, whatsoever. It's not just about dexterity (though a spoon requires more effort dexterity-wise), it's about if you do things, use things, wield things with with your left hand, of course you would also use the cutlery that needs most action with your left hand. That is just simple common sense.

I cannot use my right hand to use/wield a fork or a spoon. I simply can't. I've tried and I can't. Which would be the same for approx 95% of left handers.

hold our cutlery the wrong way round.

There is no 'wrong way around', there is no correct hand to hold your cutlery in. There never has been. Only some backward tradition/superstition. And it does not matter one iota what hand you hold a fork or spoon in.

Neither of those links work.

And regardless I can find links that show that writing with your right hand is 'the only correct way', so your ignorance, narrow-mindedness and lack of compassion remains...

.... But what makes it the "wrong" way round?

Why is it wrong?

🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐

If you do things with your left hand, and it's more dominant, why would you wield something with your right hand?
But you have to use both your hands. Using a knife and fork requires equal amounts of dexterity in both hands. It's never occurred to me to do it the wrong way round because there's no advantage. That's why I was so surprised to find out reasonably late in life it is seen as a left-handed thing. Neither of my left-handed parents get it either.

I can put "wrong" in quotation marks if you like. Or use the word unconventional instead.

But why is it "proper". Whhyyyyyy? 🧐🧐🧐🧐

Why would anyone not bring their children up to eat properly? It's a life skill that parents should be teaching their children. When they grow up, if they adults choose to eat like slobs, that's up to them. But at least give them the choice by teaching them the correct way.

@Florenz why is holding your fork in your left hand the correct way?

The fact you even noticed what hands their cutlery was in, is really sad.

Unconventional isn't the same as wrong though, is it?

By saying the wrong way round, implies that it is incorrect somehow or offensive or rude or something.

It's none of these things,it's just like.... You put your right shoe on first, and then your left. But someone else does it the other way round.

But somehow people seem to think it's terrible table manners... When it is a old made up rule from a time where rich people had nothing better to do and actually makes no difference.

Who of these "Left is Right!" for eating, gets changed for their dinner every night? Who of you are ensuring that the napkin is in the "correct" place etc

classroom.synonym.com/table-setting-etiquette-napkin-placement-12085268.html

www.candacesmithetiquette.com/left-handed.html

blog.anythinglefthanded.co.uk/left-handed-eating/

Why is holding your fork in your left hand correct?

@Florenz How does me holding a fork in my left hand rather than the right hand, make me a 'slob'? We aren't talking about slurping or dribbling or eating with your mouth open. Just that left-handers use their left hand, and there is no 'proper' hand to use your fork or spoon in. It is the dominant hand.

It doesn’t. It makes people with a stick up their arse feel superior to tell you so, though.

Some good comments on this earlier thread from 2018. Thankfully most saying that there is no right or wrong way. www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3141288-knife-in-left-hand

I don't eat like a slob! My parents taught me to not talk with my mouth full, to sit up straight in my chair, to use a napkin etc etc. Which hand I happen to have my fork in has no bearing on my table manners. I don't see how it possibly could.

No one has been able to answer the question why it's wrong lol

I wonder why... 🤔🤔🤔🤔

No, it doesn't. A fork is what delivers the food from your plate to your mouth. The fork contains the food and is manoeuvred to you mouth. That, requires more dexterity than cutting, while the fork holds the meat (or whatever it is) in place.

Yep, no argument than they've been 'told' it's the 'correct way', and lack the critical thinking to challenge why, and what difference does it make? They display the same backward, uncompassionate and obstinately closed mind that those who told left handers they were wrong to write lefthanded.

But WHY? They have no argument. They know it.

Thanks for proving my point. Do you tell people you see using their cutlery in the "wrong" hands that you think they're scum sucking plebs?

I posted earlier in the thread about having my left hand tied behind my back in primary school. Thankfully my mum wasn't like some of the posters here who "trained" their child to use cutlery in their imagined "right" way. I simply can't get my head around why you would do that to your own child. Train them? Like a bloody circus animal for some archaic social law.
Also when I went to 'big school' I remember a teacher trying to teach me to knit. My brain just couldn't compute how to. So she wedged me between her knees and slapped me every time I got it wrong. My mum put a stop to that too. I half expected to be burned as a witch just because I'm left handed ffs!