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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that it is ok to jump the queue when with an infant?

504 replies

Eole · 24/10/2022 19:42

DH, DC (3 months) and I were flying for the first time today to see family, long expected break!
We had booked priority, lounges and everything we could to relieve a bit of the stress.
Priority queue was quite long to check in luggage and we started queuing nicely.
Another mum came along and told us we could jump the queue which we did gladly as baby started stirring a little bit.
However it enraged some of the people in the queue, literally shouting that it was very out of order and that was no such thing as baby class, and what is wrong with you people etc.
Interestingly, every other step in the airport (security, customs, boarding) we were invited nicely by the staff to jump the queue.

So YANBU, of course you can jump the queue when with an infant
YABU no, you should queue like everyone else

OP posts:
PrinnyPree · 24/10/2022 20:32

I definitely think there should be a hierarchy of priority and those who need to because of diasbility or an upset infant should go first. (However if your infant wasn't crying and only just stirring I think it would be fair to just queue, so I can see both sides)

balalake · 24/10/2022 20:32

What is wrong is the length of the check in queue.

It is not as if the school half term in England is a surprise.

itsgettingweird · 24/10/2022 20:33

I do t know about babies but I was always called to the front when travelling with disabled ds.

They also always offered me priority bearding for free but we would get on last as ds found that easier.

OceanbreezeSun · 24/10/2022 20:34

This really wouldn’t bother me. Everyone knows that travelling with young dc can be stressful, I’m not going to begrudge mum/dad with young dc going to the front if it makes things abit easier.

The passengers shouting out to you were idiots.

Anon778833 · 24/10/2022 20:34

Having a 3 month old is not a disability. I must say that I find it very strange the number of people who think that having a small child means they should be prioritised. Why should you? If anything, they are easy at this age because you can rock them and they don’t struggle to get down. Mum of 4 kids, here.

pollykitty · 24/10/2022 20:35

Confusion101 · 24/10/2022 20:26

OP is talking about check in, not boarding!

Show quote history

I think people want to get on to get luggage space. Everyone has at least one bag and probably two and they all want it in the overhead. I've been guilty of this, although I only put my 'big' one overhead. I flew last week and one flight attendant on a short hop to Brussels went down the aisle and took every backpack, jacket and handbag out of the overheads and made the owners put them under the seat. People were annoyed and argued with him. It's just a space fight. That's why people want on the plane first.

Anon778833 · 24/10/2022 20:35

itsgettingweird · 24/10/2022 20:33

I do t know about babies but I was always called to the front when travelling with disabled ds.

They also always offered me priority bearding for free but we would get on last as ds found that easier.

Yes, disability is quite different and should be prioritised

Quisquam · 24/10/2022 20:35

Did it occur to you OP, that other people paid for priority check in, for a reason - like they have hidden disabilities and can’t stand for long?

We don’t fly with DD very often; but when we do, we’d pay for priority check in, because she can’t safely stand for long. I can’t stand for more than 20 minutes myself, due to pain; but my need is not in the same league as DD’s! I’d be annoyed if someone with a small baby, pushed to the head of the queue, on the grounds they have a small baby.

Incidentally, we will never forget our flight to Florida with 18 month old twins - they screamed for 4 hours, because they needed to go to sleep in a cot; and we had booked sky cots; but the staff wouldn’t give them to us, until they had served all the meals, cleared up, and done the sales of duty frees….We also had DC1, six years older. We have never flown with that airline again!

GoodnightGentleBoris · 24/10/2022 20:35

AffIt · 24/10/2022 19:49

I fly a lot and it's generally a given that priority boarding is given to people with disabilities or mobility issues and people with young children - I presume the idea is that they don't have to stand in line, which I appreciate would be tiresome.

However - and I expect a fulsome kicking for this - IME, it then holds up boarding, because people with small children often (expectedly so) travel with a lot of hand luggage, juggling children, trying to get sorted in seats etc.

Would it not be better to do a sort of 'reverse priority boarding' and chuck all the able-bodied / unimpeded people on and let them scrum it out first, then escort passengers with additional needs on last, so that they can sorted? Let them sit in comfort, have the relevant ground crew looking after them then take them on as the flight is more or less ready to go? Might have to load their hand luggage first, but maybe a sort of crack ground crew team could do this.

It would take longer this way as people would have to find more space for their carry on prams etc

boarding takes as long as it takes, there is no time saving to be made your way

ManefesationofConciousness · 24/10/2022 20:35

User19876 · 24/10/2022 19:45

Usually they invite people with young children up first. I wouldn’t have jumped the queue unless invited personally but I wouldn’t have an issue with you doing it. The people shouting at you were unreasonable too though.

Thats boarding not check in
Never seen families prioritised at check in

rudebanana · 24/10/2022 20:39

I was going to say YWNBU as it’s always been done, but I misread your OP. I thought you meant when you were boarding but you jumped the check in queue? As in when you first arrive at the airport and go to the desk for bag drop & boarding pass? No that was definitely rude and not the done thing!

StClare101 · 24/10/2022 20:42

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 24/10/2022 19:47

every other step in the airport (security, customs, boarding) we were invited nicely by the staff to jump the queue

Sorry I took this to mean the whole lot.

Still can't get worked up. Everyone's got a seat on the plane so does it really matter if those with a greater need board first?

Why anyone stands in the queue is beyond me as there's a reserved seat so I don't actually need to queue - its not first come first served and when the planes full you get left behind.

Still no. This wasn’t the boarding queue, it was the check in queue which you can’t really avoid if you have luggage.

Imissmybabygirl · 24/10/2022 20:43

When my kids were buggy age, we always get invited to the front of the queue at boarding gate.

ThirtyThreeTrees · 24/10/2022 20:45

I really dislike most queue jumpers but the airplane boarding one just fries my brian altogether.

Everyone has a designated set. It's there whether you are first or last boarding! I want everyone who looks like they have potential to delay take off to get on first, not last. Let anyone with kids or anyone reason that flying is more difficult for, get on first. Give them more time to settle so we are guaranteed to repeat on time.

riceuten · 24/10/2022 20:45

Airports I'm fine with, it's difficult enough travelling long distance with infants.

However, I completely draw the line at jumping queues in supermarkets, shops, in restaurants/cafes, at the hairdressers, getting on a bus "because I've got kids". Sorry, having children is not a "Get out of jail free" priority service card. Just because your kids will create because they have been made to wait, is not reason enough to skip a queue. But that's for a different thread entirely.

Gloryofthe80s · 24/10/2022 20:46

Another mum came along and told us we could jump the queue

I dread to think what you would have done if she told you to jump of a bridge!

Blowyourowntrumpet · 24/10/2022 20:46

No, it's bloody well not alright. You're not special because you've got a child. Just queue like everyone else

BadNomad · 24/10/2022 20:47

Disruptive toddlers I can understand, but I don't think your 3-month-old baby cares about queuing. And I don't understand why you or your DH couldn't have queued while the other sat with the baby until your turn arrived.

Ifulikepinacoladas · 24/10/2022 20:47

Imissmybabygirl · 24/10/2022 20:43

When my kids were buggy age, we always get invited to the front of the queue at boarding gate.

But this was at check - in....

Totally different. I don't care how quickly I board a plane. But I do want to get through check in quick - get rid of bags, go and shop and eat. I don't want people pushing in at check in.

Thighdentitycrisis · 24/10/2022 20:47

YABU
you can’t just go to the front without an invitation by staff just because you have a baby. What need did your baby have to go first if they were just starting to stir a little bit? Do you do this in every queue you are in?

I know we are programmed to protect and care for our offspring but we have also evolved and can consider of the needs of others.

If we don’t, this could lead to kids running around screaming in restaurants, taking seats for the elderly on public transport when child could sit on parent lap, and my pet peeve, riding scooter in supermarket!!

if baby was screaming, needed to feed or change then it’s a different matter.

Bemoredog · 24/10/2022 20:47

I've never seen anyone queue jump at check in, so can understand people being pretty fed up with you. Priority boarding is a different matter.

Since the plane doesn't take off until everyone is boarded, I don't really see the point of priority boarding, except in the case of disability, or as previously mentioned a life threatening allergy.

Confusion101 · 24/10/2022 20:47

The most unreasonable thing here is the amount of people talking about boarding when OP is talking about check in! 🙄

StClare101 · 24/10/2022 20:48

Sharming · 24/10/2022 20:25

I cannot understand the queuing logic on flights.

To me - being first in any queue has the following potential benefits:

  1. Getting whatever it is you're queuing for first. e.g. food, the toilet, a ticket
  2. Getting a better place in whatever your'e queuing for e.g. a better seat, a place at the front.
  3. Getting your thing done so you can go do other things.

People do realise that the flight can't leave until EVERYONE is on the flight, and you already have seats allocated to you - don't they? So the ONLY benefit to being at the front of the queue to board a flight is #3 above - getting your thing done first. Which in this case means getting on the plane, getting your stuff out of the way, getting settled in your seats first.

ANYONE who flies regularly knows that the number one delay to boarding and the most annoying thing is people who have boarded in front of you faffing with their stuff and blocking the aisle, preventing other people from getting to their seats.

A person travelling with a small child inevitably has more stuff and more faff. Would you prefer that person to get on the plane first to give them plenty of time to sort their stuff out before you need to get to your seat - or would you prefer for them to be right in front of you and block the aisle preventing you from sitting down - or worse still, would you prefer for them to get on last and delay everyone while we wait for them to deal with their stuff?

It's a no brainer to get those people on first. It benefits everyone.

People who complain are morons - ignore them.

This is all very nice but it was the check in queue not boarding, and this is extremely clear in the OP.

Readaboutyourself · 24/10/2022 20:48

At check in? Nah.

Airports are 90% queuing so if you’re not disabled suck it up.

surreygirl1987 · 24/10/2022 20:48

But OP says another mum 'invited' her to jump the queue, not the staff. If this person was giving up her own place to swap with OP, fine, but otherwise the OP shouldn't have jumped the queue

Exactly. Although I wouldn't have shouted at you- that's also unreasonable.