Ready for backlash with this one...

[Netflixandaps]

AIBU to expect on dating sites for men around my age group 40-50 to be able to write a sentence like an adult rather than it being like I am communicating with a 12 year old on Snapchat..... They still write 'u', 'wot', '2', 'ru', 'ere', 'b', 'cud' (I could go on)... My absolute favourite is the question 'wot u up 2'.. Surely to goodness I'm not expecting too much?

Oh dear! And to think of all the men I blocked for their bad spelling! I could be married by now! 🤣

Having said that, I wanted someone with a university degree. DP has none and he is far more cultured than all graduates I know, he just had far too much fun when he was young…

Yes it does, it filters out the idiots so in a way the illiterati are doing you a favour.

Wouldn't (didn't) bother me in the slightest.

I have 3 in their 20s and they all abbreviate - out of interest.

The mentioning sex on the second message would put me off though.

I hate that kind of text speech, I think it looks either lazy or childish - it’s ok if it’s between friends who do the same but not when you first meet someone whether formal circs or not. I understand some people can’t spell well but I’d rather see a misspelled text than these horrible shortcuts

I'm obviously completely in the minority then 😂

It's the ones who sign up with a nickname that drive me mad. "Spannaz" or "Dazzer" and the like or the "only here to see what's out there" or the "can't use my photos because of my job" types that annoy me more than the ones who use nicknames

Who can't spell that should say

I get work emails like this from a woman who is paid double what I am.

And no, she isn't really good at her job and this is one little flaw. I ahd a really good rapport with a client sorting something out for them, and she joined the post with a twatty instruction for me written in crayon. They mentioned it to me on the phone later as a negative. She is supposed to manage relationships with these people!

I agree with the others - an easy way to narrow it down. If it's 90% of them, so be it. My assumption would be that either:
They are too lazy to type properly - not attractive
They don't know how to spell basic English- not attractive
They think they sound younger - you are fooling no one. Also not attractive
They don't care enough about you to put in any effort whatsoever (possibly because they are knocking out loads of these messages)

I've never had to attempt online dating, and don't ever plan to. But I wish you luck!

From a 40/50 age range to me it comes across as they're very thick.

Can we also include people who type four ellipsis when it should be three?

I swear one of the reasons I married my husband was his articulate text messages and refusal to use anything other than full, properly spelled words.

YANBU. But when mobiles were first a thing (likely that age group were early adopters) you were charged by the letter for SMS messages and I guess they've just never grown out of that habit 🤷‍♀️

Tell me you're old, without telling me you're old?

'wot me no w8, ahm dn wiv da kids. An ma own grankinds'.

YANBU - my favourite OLD profile was a woman who said she was an "interlectual"

I don't think anyone ever got charged by the letter, but by the message and the limit per message was low.

I've also seen many, many women who type like that, it's definitely not just a man thing.

Nah older people do generally speak and write better so this excuse doesn't fly.

Young people IME more likely to send voice notes which is even fucking more annoying.

But yes when they write, they write full words. People my age (mid 30s) tend to write full words. Agree it's older people that still seem to think they are being charged per character, though more men - maybe they see it as more efficient? Or they just don't text as much as women do. I know for example my BIL hardly ever uses his phone and if he does he makes a phone call. SIL despairs at him leaving it in his van so she can never get hold of him.

@ListeningButNotHearing
From a 40/50 age range to me it comes across as they're very thick.

I agree.

When I used OLD about 98% of the guys had about 6 brain cells.
One guy told me he was 'professional'. When I asked what he did he said he drove a tractor !

Instant ick. Should add that to the current 'what gives you the ick' thread 😂

Yes not literally charged per character, it was per 140 characters. But when someone writes "WUU2?" you would think they are being charged per character. It's not like that wouldn't fit in a single message using full words. It's hyperbole.

Older people IME write properly on facebook, email etc but anything perceived as a text gets the text speak. Instant messenger is a new one to some people 45+ (I know not all, before you jump on me!) so there seems to be confusion about whether to treat it as text messaging or email.

Also, not calling 40-50 "older in general" but "older than people in 30s or younger"

😂 years back internet dating at the start of my 30s I found this. On that basis alone I ruled them out.

No point wasting your time on men who are unsuitable for you... regardless of the reason you deem them unsuitable.

I don't think writing like that necessarily indicates a man being a bad person, but clearly not what you are looking for in terms of education or articulacy, so better that this is revealed from the get go! Agree that this would be a complete non starter for me.

If they're older and still doing this from the days of having to press each number a millon times to get the letters to write texts, then I think that is also an indicator of what you might not be looking for, rather than purely an age thing? I know plenty of school dads in their 40's/early 50's and texts are brief, yes, but always full words and sentences.

But I do agree with the poster above who says that if you're getting many of these, your profile and preferences might not be screening them out properly.