To think working class shows?

[MrsBonnie]

I work in a lovely school where they’ve all had very different upbringings to me. Very much working class here. Sometimes I think it shows with little things I’ve noticed.

Having sugar in tea, using a tumble drier, not having a cleaner, using the wrong glasses for different drinks (I.E using the same one for everything!)… what else am I missing that excludes me from the club 😂 sometimes I will mention something like the above and get “oh I never use a tumble drier” … then I just think oops have I said something weird there?

Sometimes I think they’re judging me with things I say and do but I hope not! I grew up being homeless at a certain point, council houses, single teen (but amazing) mum, a very specific type of circle. I feel like Mum did everything she could to get us out of that way of life, but I can’t help but feel I don’t belong sometimes. Or that I stick out like a sore thumb. Am I being daft? Imposter syndrome a little bit!

This is so interesting (haven’t read the whole thread), but in the US that’s what those who can’t afford a proper dryer do it. It’s kinda poor or rural. But to be fair, we actually have dryers dedicated to the purpose.

Seriously, the air dry pulley thing is washer woman level. mind you, this is in big cities. Even with the room that’s not really done…..

What class where you live actually has regular washer dryers? One for washing and one for drying? Not just one. But both?

My American mind in filled with trans fats and confusion…. Apologies but legitimately want to understand!

It just seems opposite!

THIS

It is the weirdest Middle Class Flex I’ve ever seen!

I see them all with closepins in their mouths hanging their panties! Just is not the flex they think it is! 😂

But you all have these micro type of aggressions as you try to class up. There is a difference here from how poor I grew up. But it is staggering in nature.

I grew up ridiculously poor. I rose up and clawed my way to …. far better than most can dream… it is education, simple social graces, very basic things that will be noticed.

However……
I am not talking about how one consumes a chicken wing…..

You all are talking about sugar in tea and weird stuff.

These little things to feel superior and actually above is not a thing in the US. Sorry…If someone brings up little things like this then they are seen lower just by their mentality. They seem worried, pressed, and weak. THAT lowers the perceived worth on an individual.

It is not the same at all, I am sorry you have to deal with women believing what sort of sweetness level to ones drink denotes class.

i find this all interesting, but make zero mistake: We are not the same.

TeaPleaseNoLemon

the whole not drying cloths outside in the USA has always made a laugh. I remember Ewan McGregor being on a U.K. chat show and telling the story of how he had his Nana and her sister visiting him in Hollywood from Scotland, he went onto the balcony of his home we’re they were both looking at the view they were very confused because it was a lovely drying day and nobody had there washing out !! When he told them everyone used a dryer they looked at his like he was mad, but Ewan it’s a perfect drying day not a cloud in the sky and a lovely breeze.

@Nanalisa60

Right?!?

Here they have rules where you can’t. If you live in a SUPER nice building in a cities exclusive area… You aren’t allowed to even consider the thought!

Most buildings won’t allow it, or any attached houses. Even if you live in a single home in the city it is curious and seemingly poor to use any space for it. You shame yourself putting dads boxers on the line for anyone to have a laugh at. PLUS cleaners or any help staff wouldn’t ever put anything on a line.

Nothing posh about having your things for all to see on the line. Also garments are so much stiffer from line drying. Though I do thing it’s better for the environment…

Weird cultural differences! Thank you for that reminder!

We have a 'drying deck' built specifically for drying clothes. We also have a clothes line in a windy part of the garden. We also have a laundry room with a tumble dryer.

I don't use any of those - we have a laundry service with laundry picked up from our home, then delivered washed and pressed.

I am NOT middle class. So not sure how you having space to dry your clothes makes you middle class

I actually think it's more of an English thing than a WC thing. Granted, I don't know every Scottish or N. Irish person, and I know zero Welsh people, but I've literally never heard of any other than English people obsess over class like they do on MN.

I'm what people would call WC, and I went to a MC grammar school. The differences were clear, yet "class" was never mentioned or discussed.

I am solidly MC, definitely wealthy and have a full time.housekeeper. However, we love a tumble drier! Fluffs the towels and cuts down on ironing.

Sounds like quite cliquey, bitchy overtones to all of this OP.
They’re making you feel like an outsider & it’s pathetic. The fact that they’re laughing about, or going on about expressions, things you say or do, what you ate for lunch is OTT. They shouldn’t be doing that! It might be a “lovely” school in a “naice” area but they sound like insular, narrow minded pearl clutchers!!
They sound like they’re the insecure ones - usually people who try to police class boundaries are ones aspiring to be more socially mobile than they really are. Aspirational & needing to police & make sure that the correct “class” & its codes of behaviour & norms are met with & maintained.
If I were you I’d deliberately try to mix up this unhealthy little vipers nest because it doesn’t sound as “lovely” as you describe.
Revel in being who you are, a mix of where you’re from & what you’ve learned along the way. Who the hell are they to dictate how & what the right way is to do or say anything? (Apart from when they’re in the classroom). There is no right or wrong way!
Be pleased you’re not so pathetically classist & concerned about such inane matters. Just throw it back to them & joke about how they’ve clearly never mixed outside of their own narrow minded bubble. That they need to get out more. That you’re gobsmacked that they’ve never met anyone “working class” until now. How is that even possible?? Grrrr!!

I think the opposite about the tumble drier. My mum is very working class and thinks TDs are fancy and posh.

Oh and the pulley on the ceiling seems working class to me. My granny had one on the ceiling of her kitchen when she lived in a tiny tenement.

I see tumble driers more as a "have little kids so too much washing to dry" kind of thing.

There is no middle class that's just for pretenders, if you work, like it or lump it, you're working class and would be seen that way by the upper class.

Technically anyone who is forced to work to live is working class so... that's most people.

I recently realised that I’m working class, whatever that means, because people keep saying that the JSO/Extinction Rebellion ilk tend to be privileged, posh, middle class kids and older people with too much time on their hands and for whatever reasons, who don’t need to go to work; and I think they are an absolute disgrace.

I honestly don't get the whole social class thing.

I think though that people with REAL class, the type of class that matters are people who make you feel welcome and valued whatever social class you are.

Middle class people still have towels and bed linen?! Where on earth would you dry a houseful of king size duvet covers every week if not in the dryer?!

I'm working class and have a tumble drier in the the garage! Dunno what that makes me ,

I don’t have a tumble drier. I used to have a combination washer-dryer and we found we never ever used the dryer function (maybe once in 5 years?) so when it broke just replaced with a normal washing machine.
I would say I’m pretty middle class. I think a lot of it is they’re very environmentally damaging, and I try so hard in most things I do. Also I love hanging washing out in the garden in the sun and it brightens up whites, removed stains naturally. Then in winter I just carry on outside if it’s dry or use an airer.. if doesn’t seem much work. So many things I wash in winter are woollen anyway I could only use a tumble drier on a portion.

I asked a very, very wealthy friend recently if she had a tumble drier and she said she did but added quickly that she “hardly ever uses it of course”.

Usually hang it on the line outside? Luckily they dry fast even in winter.

Wrong glasses? no problem here. When using my tumble dryer, I often invite people around to admire it while we swig our added sugar drinks from a random selection of old jars.

I agree.
I am deeply proud of my working class roots.
I grew up in a huge poverty striken council scheme, known for miles around as being, rough, violent.
In my early 20s I would lie if asked where I grew up- I was embarrassed and worried about being judged.
I never lie now about my roots. I come from generations of people who mined coal out of the ground on their hands and knees, worked the soil in small patches to help feed their family. People of resilience and strength, who had to cope with a meagre existance- yet they did.
I am proud of who I am.

You have absolutely put your finger on it, OP.
Schools are a very middle-class environment and teachers (and others) do make judgements about these things.
As a teacher, I have hundreds of anecdotes about staff, parents and pupils who did this.
I think it puts you in a special position where you acquire an awareness of the cultural differences that come with class. It's what most working-class kids feel everyday and it can be a real barrier to learning and opportunity.
Use your understanding and first-hand experience, OP, to improve the lot of those kids. And be proud!

Yes - it did come across and there are loads of posters misreading what you have written. I think this is because they are mistaken in thinking that we live in a classless society. They also seem to lack the understanding needed to see the nuance in class difference. I think the threads on mumsnet about class are interesting and there are some thoughtful posts on this thread. Just focus on them.