Pram debacle on the bus

[bibetyboo]

Boarded the bus today with 9mo asleep in pram, underneath of pram half full. In the designated pram area there were a couple of shopping trolleys that had been left by two elderly passengers. The driver asked for them to be removed so that I could fit pram in, but both of them contested that I should not have been let on the bus and ought to have waited for the next one.

The driver looked at me and apologized and I replied that it was fine, I would just stand with her somewhere out of the way (the gangway really). It was pissing down with rain, and buses here come every hour.

Whilst standing with pram, both trolley owners began to mutter, enough so I could hear, about my being on the bus. That I ought to have waited for the next bus, that it's ridiculous as in their day they would have to take the pram down. I was entitled and privileged. Lots of sighing and eye rolling.

At this point I'm fuming. I've let it go, not challenged the trolley parking and am just trying to get home. Acquaintance of trolley owner begins to witter on about how on earth he will get off the bus with 'that woman and her baby'. Trolley owner explains nice and loud, 'she'll just have to get off in the rain'.

Patience. Reached. The bus is PACKED at this point. I ask 'acquaintance' to mind his business and asks both trolley owners why they are so hateful towards a young woman, getting on the bus with her baby, followed by, in the fog of rage, telling them to simply 'fuck off'.

All parties were silenced and the remainder of the bus journey was tense to say the least. It involved a few three point turns and reversing to allow other passengers OFF and ON.

Now I feel terribly guilty that I shouted at an elderly person.

EQUALLY, I've come to realise there is an old sun culture within the elderly or let's say 'older' community. This bizzare disdain for the 'youth of today' who have 'never had it so easy'. Lol, come see me when we remortgage next month (HELP).

Was I unreasonable to tell them where to go?

God this is boring. Read original post. SUB culture WITHIN the older community. That is not a generalization

i need the priority seats. i cant just sit anywhere else. But its first come first served and if anybody else was sitting in there i would wait for next bus

It's a space for the pram,trolleys shouldn't be there.
And if they are they should just move.

Legally, the priority is for wheelchairs. then everyone else. in my area it includes trolleys because they a mobility aid as well as pushchairs and walkers

No, I wish more women could stand up for themselves similarly because they don't deserve half the amount of shit they get on a daily basis and it might make people stop seeing them as easy targets

Sorry but elderly comes before prams. If you'd got on and there was a person in a wheelchair would you have demanded they move? No you'd have had to fold your pram! You have the choice to have a child whilst reliant on buses, they aren't choosing to be elderly!

They are choosing to get on a bus though.

includes trolleys along with prams and walkers, i mean. wheelchairs are only priority for that space legally. other disabilities, carers pregnant or elderly have our own space. its the priority seats.

same as those with prams or wheelchairs. choice for them too

i agree here. i think mums get a raw deal.

Exactly this pensioners have a free bus pass that's why they use buses so much. It was wheelchair users who campaigned for accessible buses. I've seen some mums get the bus to 2 or 3 stops away when we've had gorgeous weather so can't use that as an excuse. I used to walk miles pushing my children in they're prams. Baby was wrapped up but from two they spent more time walking next to the pram push a doll buggy. It's good exercise they complain about having to walk.

For those of you arguing that the space is also for trolleys..

I need priority seating and if there were no seats at the bus stop either I'd have no option than to get on the bus and take a seat from someone, because I just can't stand for long. I am glad I don't have to rely on public transport tbh. I really feel for those that do

They're elderly! They use the replies because they cannot manage to carry their shopping! They're essentially a mobility aid!! OP is BVVVVU and so are you! As a disabled parent myself I still fully believe that as having kids is a choice & being elderly isn't, mobility/age issues come first!

@dontfeelrealsometimes I understand. I normally give up my seat for anyone who asks whenever I'm in a position to do so and encourage my older child to do so too.

This woman didn't ask like a normal polite person but instantly went into sneer mode just because I happened to be there. She didn't say she had a disability or difficulties standing and if she did have any hidden issues they certainly didn't prevent her from hovering over me for 10 minutes in a moving bus when she had a choice to sit in an empty seat a couple of steps away.

She simply fancied that seat and thought she was entitled to it on account of being older than me.

I'm glad you told them to fuck off. First they were entitled dicks. Then they were bitchy and gleeful in putting a mother and baby down. Absolutely they needed to hear it. They're nasty twats. I hope they were ashamed of themselves.

So anyone who has a different opinion to you is immediately a 'troll?!'

I think you need to look up the definition of a troll

I remember how hard it is navigating public transport with babies and toddlers. Passengers who are shirty towards you when you are just doing your best to get from A to B are going to tip you over the edge sometimes. Rubbish behaviour from them. You lost it, you are only human. Don't beat yourself up.

But they can move the trollies into seats next to them. They can move the trollies elsewhere. They were not standing there holding them. No one is saying they cant use them. No one has literally booted granny while she stands with her trolley, jesus christ.
Common sense is seriously lacking here. They could have moved their trollies to allow the pram into the space. They chose not to because they were entitled.

It's ok, you can say twats, cunts or fuckers, or whatever, people swear all the time here 😂

Perhaps you should take some of the advice in this screenshot yourself:
"If the designated area is already occupied, please fold the pram or stroller"

You acted just as unreasonable and entitled as the elderly people. Stop having a go at the elderly when you were just as wrong.

@Cherrytree77 I beg your pardon? How dare you declare me to be lacking in common sense?! That's the biggest projection! I'm merely pointing out that babies do NOT come before elderly people with mobility issues (which is the main reason elderly women use the trollies). Perhaps OP should get a driving licence if she doesn't like it?

The disgraceful attitude towards the elder generation on here is sickening

The space is absolutely not for trolleys, what’s wrong with people🤣

OP you’re definitely not in the wrong. I have a double buggy and I’m constantly fighting with people, it’s ridiculous

I only have one DC.
I remember in London how difficult it was on public transport with a young {Well behaved} toddler.
He had a folding buggy, but it was not pleasant negotiating public transport, especially the Tube.
Different regions make a big difference.
Some really friendly people out of London on buses.
Ideally we need the old 'Conductors' back.
They were great.

I can see it from both sides, when mine were younger you had to foldthe pushchair up no matter what, it was a struggle if you had 2 young ones plus shopping, often you would have to rely on someone else helping out, but most people didn't mind. I think you have to be careful of not generally prioritising yourself over everyone else when you have a baby, as for the swearing you let yourself down.