Pram debacle on the bus

[bibetyboo]

Boarded the bus today with 9mo asleep in pram, underneath of pram half full. In the designated pram area there were a couple of shopping trolleys that had been left by two elderly passengers. The driver asked for them to be removed so that I could fit pram in, but both of them contested that I should not have been let on the bus and ought to have waited for the next one.

The driver looked at me and apologized and I replied that it was fine, I would just stand with her somewhere out of the way (the gangway really). It was pissing down with rain, and buses here come every hour.

Whilst standing with pram, both trolley owners began to mutter, enough so I could hear, about my being on the bus. That I ought to have waited for the next bus, that it's ridiculous as in their day they would have to take the pram down. I was entitled and privileged. Lots of sighing and eye rolling.

At this point I'm fuming. I've let it go, not challenged the trolley parking and am just trying to get home. Acquaintance of trolley owner begins to witter on about how on earth he will get off the bus with 'that woman and her baby'. Trolley owner explains nice and loud, 'she'll just have to get off in the rain'.

Patience. Reached. The bus is PACKED at this point. I ask 'acquaintance' to mind his business and asks both trolley owners why they are so hateful towards a young woman, getting on the bus with her baby, followed by, in the fog of rage, telling them to simply 'fuck off'.

All parties were silenced and the remainder of the bus journey was tense to say the least. It involved a few three point turns and reversing to allow other passengers OFF and ON.

Now I feel terribly guilty that I shouted at an elderly person.

EQUALLY, I've come to realise there is an old sun culture within the elderly or let's say 'older' community. This bizzare disdain for the 'youth of today' who have 'never had it so easy'. Lol, come see me when we remortgage next month (HELP).

Was I unreasonable to tell them where to go?

Priority seats are for:
The disabled
Then, for anyone else who may find standing difficult, the elderly, pregnant women, parents with small children etc.
We are moving the thread into disablism now I see.
Cool.

"The OP was not supposed to take down her pram as hers was the only pram onboard the bus and should have access to the allocated space!"

Yes she was. What's so difficult to understand? OP had her pram blocking the aisle, which is not allowed. Prams have to be folded if there is no room in the allocated pram space, they can't stand in the aisle blocking other passengers.

I'm not saying the elderly passengers shouldn't have moved - they should have. But OP had no right to block the bus for the rest of the passengers, especially when it was packed.

Both as wrong as each other.

Fancy them bitching and making comments all the way through your journey and then you, wound up by the thought of your mortgage, giving it back.
chinny chin chin

I wasn't talking to you. I was calling out the disablist poster who thinks to be disabled you need to wave your wooden leg at her so she lets you have the seat.

You may want to educate yourself about hidden disabilities.

I'm educated enough, thanks.
Her balance and mobility were better than mine with a baby strapped to me and could've used any of the other seats available. She chose not to and instead stood over me for several stops so she could bitch in my ear. But I refused to be bullied out of my seat.

These passengers wanted a confrontation. They'd refused to comply with the directions of the driver, then spent the entire journey up until that point making disparaging comments about another passenger.

When you snapped, OP, they got the desired result. Either that, or they really were arrogant enough to think that if they sufficiently bullied you by making enough passive aggressive comments in their hearing, you'd comply, disembark, and wait another hour in the pouring rain, with your child.

Interesting that they did stop the behaviour when vocally challenged. I wouldn't have wanted to give them that, but can well appreciate that after an elongated period of continual carping, you'd had enough.

Beats me why so many people are so lacking in basic skills of social interaction. The driver sounds a bit of a wet lettuce as well. Presumably s/he is responsible for health and safety on their own bus, and in this case as breach had occurred. Had any serious incident happened and evacuation impeded as a consequence, would drivers be held individually liable?

Being old isn’t a licence to be a twat as some think
don’t give it a 2nd thought

No, someone else should have given up a seat, priority or otherwise. Its fucking stupid to ask a woman holding a baby to move, and pure entitled and bullyish behaviour to demand a certain seat.

YA100%NBU like others have said. Those areas are for prams and wheelchairs. Wheelchairs take priority.

I've had something similar happen to me. I had a double buggy with me and the driver made the pensioner move her bags and trolleys. Lots of muttering and sighing. Absolutely ridiculous behaviour!

well i need my trolley as a disabiliity aid. i cant lift or fold a full trolley due to my disability. i expect was case with these women.

legally if you're disabled they cant ask you to move i dont think. but i think its a shame that mothers with prams have to move. it should be first come first served. the law should not favour one over the other

I don't think you was in the wrong at all OP. The bus driver should have stayed firm and made sure they removed trolleys. It is stressful enough getting on a bus with a pram, let alone being goaded by two entitled idiots. Wheelchairs have priority, then prams. Not shopping. Let's be real here

But then surely you would have said “sorry but I’m disabled and I cannot lift it”

You wouldn’t have plain out refused and then bitched the entire way would you?

Some of us had kids before the days of small easily foldable with one had prams!

I HATE those type of people! Rude old bastards. They should have been made to move their trolleys. I'm sorry you had that experience. A big hug from me, Chooksnroses, aged 73.

The OP isn’t really asking if the trollies should’ve been moved or not, it’s the fact they then started bitching about her. That’s just vile behaviour - if you’re gonna do it at least be out of ear shot ffs

No, it should not be 'first come first served' when it's shopping bags versus someone in a wheelchair or with a baby. FFS

Pensioners can be bloody entitled. They get TONS of govt help, generous grants, had houses bought for sixpence, free uni education, the best of the NHS and then tut and moan.

Granted, not ALL Pensioners, but those lucky so and sos that got pensions at Sixty and houses for sixpence really don't know they are born, sometimes.

YANBU.

In my experience, when there is extra traffic. young mum get the mob. It's not a pram area and nobody shows the slightest commiseration for the little human in it. True, the place is designated for the elderly and the wheelchairs. Not their stuff. ,(trolley, suitcase...) If it's a mobility aid they should be right next to it. Pram unfortunately always have to be folded when the bus is full. Some can hold an extraordinary amount of shopping and stand. I would have hold it in OP to be fair. It was old people talk. That's all they've got. There was a sleeping baby in the pram, they could have been more humane. It could happen again, it's the beginning of the bad season, so you might want to start thinking about how you are going to handle it without feeling bad about yourself. That was a tough morning OP. All the best.

i don't know. unless you're their doctor you cant tell how their disease affectys them. i look perfectly fine. but i'm not. my balance and mobility issues are unpredictable . i am trying not to be dependent on my cane and find my shopping trolley helps a bit but i have bought a lanyard (not sunflower one because when i had that one it confused people over masks). no one questions my lanyard

But presumably if there were other seats free, including priority seats, you would not demand a woman with a baby move when you can park your arse perfectly fine somewhere else? Because this is what happened here.

In their day their prams wouldnt have folded so i dont know why they said that

rude and entitled

they may have needed help. elderly people can have issues with mobility. it is hard to get help very often the bus driver and other passengers ignore us disabled people.

But they should not have been rude to the OP. that was nasty of them. everybody has the right to use a bus

My mum is 82, and would have also been sympathetic to @bibetyboo .

Mum lives in London, and gets the amazing 'Freedom pass' so uses public transport a lot, and wouldn't dream of nicking a Wheelchair/pushchair space with a trolley.

Meh, good for you. What a horrible pair of sniders!