To think this decision about how to give birth is impossible

[AliceAbsolum]

7 years trying, 5 rounds of IVF, previous loss. Consultant wants to induce at 39 weeks due to ivf. Or I can elect for a c section. I've been incredibly anxious through this whole pregnancy and I have no idea how to make this decision. Every time I read about it I just go back and forth. There are pros and cons on each side. It's impossible!

I'd like a straightforward natural birth but that looks unlikely to happen. How can you decide about something where you have no idea what will happen? I don't have any gut feelings or strong preferences either way. I don't want major surgery but I also don't want 3 days of pain and panic followed by surgery....

Maybe I'll just ask the consultant whats safest for the baby and go with that.

How did other people decide?

Planned c section

will this be your only child?
If yes, have a planned c section

In your situation I'd opt for the caesarean

I’d go for the planned c section every time.

I'd take the induction, I had very positive experiences with both of mine.

The nice thing about induction is you are in hospital the whole time, baby is being monitored so it is very reassuring, the pain wasn't worse than period cramps for a long time, so I watched a lot of tv for the first day or so.

I quite like being in control and I found the environment suited me very well. Once it got a bit more painful I was at 3cm and they gave me an epidural and I had a nice long sleep until it was go time!

If it was me I would go for c section. I have only ever heard bad things re induction and it may well end in c section anyway.

Honestly, I would look to connect with an independent midwife or respected doula. Understanding the absolute risks rather than relative can help you to make a more informed choice, whilst also having your wishes respected.

I had a planned section with my second child and it was an absolute amazing experience and I would do it over and over again like this.
It healed me from the car crash like birth with our first.

Sorry but taking the natural birth route in this situation is unrealistic. Always go for the safest option.

It doesn’t actually matter all that much OP… You can’t know in advance if the induction will work well or how difficult you’ll find a C-Section recovery. Either way you’ll probably end up feeling a bit sore and tired after but you’ll have your snuggly new baby to cuddle.

Planned C section definitely! Mine was wonderful and I would happily do it again!

I think planned section as well. I think it's a decision that will give you the most relief once it's made. Knowing where, when and how your baby will be born will hopefully reduce your anxiety a lot.

C section. Inductions often don’t work and end up in a c section anyway, or lots of intervention. Better to have a planned, calm section then gamble for the perfect natural birth.

I had a planned C section as an induction was medically inadvisable. The recovery was a hundred times easier than I feared.

Planned section, as above poster said I've only had and heard bad experience with inductions.

I had an induction because of going overdue and it was fine. No scary interventions and I avoided the C Section and the C Section scare (which I vainly didn’t want).

Induction is hell.
Go for planned c-section.
Ultimately the way your baby comes out isn't important, what's important is that you and baby are healthy.
It is a longer recovery time but you won't have tiredness of labour.

Make sure you have help for at least 6 weeks.

Why is it not safe to allow IVF babies to go full term?

genuine question

Planned c section all day everyday.

I had an emergency csection with my first child and offered the same choice with my second child. I chose the elective c section. You can control what happens with a section. There is no guarantee you won't need surgery during or following a vaginal birth.

It’s generally to do with the placenta failing. Often they don’t work as well. Not sure why but I haven’t looked into it for a while.

It's very healthy that you can see there isn't a perfect answer, rather than planning for a very specific scenario and being disappointed. It's the illusion of choice really, you could go into labour before it even, so just focus on "by x date, I'll have a baby!!!"

Can you attempt an induction and if it doesn't progress, go to the c-section? If not, I'd choose the elective section, but neither option is really that wrong.

I didn’t have your history but was an older first time mum at 41 with GD. We knew DD would be our only.

Initially I was keen on ELCS, but instead opted for induction but with agreement that if there was no progress we’d move quickly to a
section instead of any instrumental delivery. I actually ended up with a spontaneous 6hr vaginal delivery after failed induction (long story!) and no regrets.

If I was in your shoes I’d give vaginal a shot but with agreement to move to section if you don’t progress. No hanging about. If my induction had worked I was told I wouldn’t be allowed to go on for days anyway, they’d give it 12 hours max to get underway and then plan B due to my circs. I’d imagine they’d view you similarly.

It is safe. My IVF doctor warned me that I’d probably get pressured to have a C section but that there was no reason for one just because of IVF.

I’d opt for induction and vaginal birth. That’s what I did for my IVF baby. Induced at full term due to pre eclampsia, epidural and then an assisted delivery because of my blood pressure.

www.therealbirthcompanyltd.com/2021/04/28/ivf-and-stillbirth/

I'm not far behind you I think so we're also looking into this. I did a lot of reading up on hypnobirthing and also looked at the stats for labour outcomes for my area. I'd initially felt like a waterbirth would be best for me, very non invasive and hands off but we were told recently that won't be an option for us. Tbh it threw me for a loop because trying to figure out a plan b so close to our due date was a bit daunting and massively triggered my anxiety around labour in general. I've decided on an elected section (in my area you need to meet with a birth preferences consultant who my midwife referred me to. We're still waiting on this but I think their job is to go through the pros and cons with you and try to make sure you're making the right choice for you and baby.) For me it basically came down to that I require an induced labour as they think I'm likely to need intervention of some description and I would prefer to have a planned section than an emergency one if I start to struggle. I've weighed up the support I'll have at home for the first 4-6 weeks after the surgery and have recruited family who will be able to give me a hand when dh goes back to work as I know the recovery can be harder with a section. So might be worth considering what support you have available as well. Also I'd consider if you're high risk and if so why. For me I settled that I would be more likely to regret it if I had a vaginal birth that didn't go to plan (because my gut is telling me go for a section), whereas if I have a planned section and something happens I think I'll feel like I made the best decision I could with the info I have. You just need to figure out what your version of that is? Maybe revisit some hypnobirthing books (how to make your birth better was one I really liked) and try to envision yourself in different settings using the techniques until you find one that fits well for you and you think would be manageable. There's no perfect choice because hindsight is always 20/20 so it's really about understanding your body and what you feel you can cope with mentally and emotionally as well as physically. I've had friends who had vaginal births which weren't straight forward but they felt that they listened to their bodies, their midwives and doctors listened to them and they still found it a really positive and empowering experience despite being intervention because the hypnobirthing helped them stay calm enough to ask for help before they were told they needed it so they felt in complete control. So really personal choice but no matter what you decide baby is very lucky to have a mummy so determined to keep them safe.

The article just says that the research does not support the assertion
that babies conceived by IVF are at more risk than other babies by the time they get to term (which is considered 38 weeks)