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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be really fed up of my sister’s attitude to my dog?!

60 replies

DogMama93 · 18/10/2022 19:05

Me and my sister got dogs from the same litter of puppies around a year ago. We see each other regularly therefore the dogs see each other regularly and we also take them both to our parents home when we visit etc.

We have completely different views about how we raise our dogs which is absolutely fine, how she raises hers is none of my business yet she makes a point to constantly and openly judge me on how I raise mine.

For example, she asked what food I was changing him onto (butternut box) and when I told her she started going on about how she would never pay prices like that (I get a few discounted boxes which has really helped) and that dogs would be fine on the stuff you can get in the supermarket (which is completely true and nothing wrong with that).

Another example, when we go and visit our parents we are there for a long day so I take his treats along etc, something to keep him chewing and busy - I done a lot of research when he was a baby on what was best and I chose what worked best for us - natural treats such as rabbit ears, chicken feet, pig ears etc because it has natural vitamins and minerals, much lower in fat and has multiple health benefits including great for teeth cleaning! I can pick them up really cheap too, like the chicken feet are 30-40p each. My sister prefers like the pedigree sticks and gravy bone biscuits etc, which my dog has had before, again nothing wrong with them but nutritionally they don’t actually add much benefit so I tend to limit them.

Every time my dog has a treat she tuts and makes the same comments every single time how people are so woke they can’t even feed their dogs supermarket food, how the treats I give him are probably why so many dogs have stomach issues because it’s not good for them etc… my dog has always been absolutely fine on them!

It’s really starting to get on my nerves after nearly a year of this, so when she commented a while back I turned around and told her I was sick of the comments, how I feed my dog these things for the nutritional value and to try and prevent health issues and keep him healthy because of the research I have done and we have moved on from the days of dogs living on scraps!

Despite this she is still carrying on and it’s got to the point where I’m not feeding him directly in front of her or I’ll take an alternative food when it’s a long day which is ridiculous really (!) but I’m just so sick of the disapproving looks and comments all the time!

Any advice?!

OP posts:
Duchess379 · 20/10/2022 17:33

My dogs are on Butternut because it's the only flipping food one of them will only eat 🤦🏼
Tell your DS to shut up, then just ignore her. She doesn't pay for your dog, it's none of her business 🐾

Pugalicious · 20/10/2022 17:41

You both need to get out more..meet new people.. have a relationship (each) and have babies or something.....

Sceptre86 · 20/10/2022 18:04

She's jealous. I would be blunt and necr time she harps on say aomething along the lines if, 'oi you I'm sick of the commentary on what I feed my dog, give it a rest'. I'd say it on repeat but then I wouldn't care of she gets the hump. Or you could be the bigger person and ignore her. Personally I'm petty so I'd close her down everytime.

Herejustforthisone · 20/10/2022 20:11

I wish that you would take her poor dog and give it the researched and considered upbringing you’re giving yours.

AloysiusBear · 20/10/2022 20:15

, i'm picking up a similar tone here as those lunchbox threads where someone is humble bragging about their child's organic vegan macrobiotic packed lunch, whilst insisting that they don't judge others for giving their children sandwiches and a frube

This. Do what you want, if questioned just shrug and say your dog does well on it, don't go on about your "research" as that carries the indirect connotation that what she feeds her dog is poorer than what you choose.

EmeraldShamrock1 · 20/10/2022 20:17

Just tell her you've no interest in her conversation so best for her to STFU.

SirMoose · 20/10/2022 20:25

I’ve read this exact thread before.

StupidSmallFruit · 20/10/2022 22:19

I doubt the OP is coming back to the thread, having started to it ask advice.

It can be hard to see the wood for the trees when it comes to family dynamics, and sometimes it does take a load of strangers to point out the obvious.

5foot5 · 21/10/2022 00:49

LampHat · 18/10/2022 20:06

Any advice?

Whatever you do, don’t have babies at the same time as each other!

You beat me to it.
What fun this will be in a few years if it is children not dogs

PickAnyName · 21/10/2022 00:58

"I know she can be moody about things so I’ve learnt what to say and what not to say around her over the years!"

But it seems she has not learnt what to say and what not to say around you. You've done your research, you are doing your best for your dog. Perhaps she means well, but perhaps she is trying to appear superior. Don't change what you feed your dog around her, his needs come before hers. TBH, I'd tell her to STFU and mind her own business... but in a caring way.

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