Holiday in 4 months and I'm not happy...am I being ungrateful ?

[cassaoppo]

My boyfriend has surprised me with a weeks holiday in 4 weeks.
He's booked us to go to Gran Canaria but I'm just not excited at all
My summer feeling has gone and I'm ready for Halloween /Christmas
I just can't be excited for a holiday 6 weeks before Xmas when it's normally freezing and I'm in jumpers.
Think the weather will be around 26/27 degrees and that's hot for me.
The hassle of having to sort through the summer bits again
I just can't be bothered tbh
Am I ungrateful?

Yup

Yes, very much so

You sound fun …

Tell him to take someone a bit more grateful

Totally ungrateful and unreasonable

Afraid you are yes

Hi OP I totally get what you mean (and so will those who make the one-liners like those above!), all I would say is going away at that time of year is wonderful! I used to go away every October/November and it was medicine in all honesty! Just don't put pressure on enjoying it too much and I'm sure you'll be pleased you went :-)

Yes, yes you are. Poor bloke

Yabu. What a fun sponge

I understand what you're saying and I'd never choose to book a summer holiday myself this time of year BUT someone else booking for me, hell yes I'm going and being grateful for it.

It’s odd that you’ve apparently been together and are close enough that he wants to take you on holiday, yet you apparently don’t actually ever talk to each other about what you like and dislike so that he’d know taking you away wouldn’t be welcome. I imagine he’d get more fun out of it if you told him to take a friend instead.

I recognise how you're feeling - thrown off kilter by something unexpected and changing the natural order of things.
But I'm autistic. So I would give myself a shake, remind myself the gift was given with lovely intentions, go with the flow and let myself enjoy the experience.
Yanbu because this is how you feel, yabu if you show it

Stupendously ungrateful. It sounds lovely. Most of us are desperate for some autumn/winter sun as the nights draw in!

Could he take a friend instead? Then he still gets to enjoy the holiday with someone who wants to go, and you can stay at home in autumn/winter clothes?

Well - I’m not sure why you need to be grateful for something you never asked for in the first place! So I’m a bit surprised at the responses.

However, I think it’s a good idea to see this as a lovely gesture/ opportunity to do something you wouldn’t normally think of. I’m sure you’ll have a lovely time when you get there.

I once had an early December trip to somewhere warm and it was amazing . The sunshine almost stayed with me for several weeks after getting back to the UK.

Yes. Tell him to take a friend in that case.

I’d love it. As nice as autumn leaves and cosy jumpers are, in a few weeks it’ll be freezing, getting dark really early, likely to be wet and windy. A break in the sun to lay by the pool and swim in the sea would be the perfect antidote. It’s easy to romanticise winter when the weather first starts changing, but in my experience that’s forgotten when you’re leaving for work in the dark in the pouring rain and your brolly is no match for the sideways wind!

Went to Cape Verde in November a few years ago. Felt the same way. Utterly loved it. By time we got there the winter nights were driving me nuts. Just think your saving on energy bill. Plus you can put tree up when you get back

Why did you put him in the position of surprising you with a holiday when you can’t even be arsed to dig out a t-shirt? That sounds utterly lame, and really mean to him.
If this is actually a genuine surprise (he knew you had a week off and just said “ta da!”) then I take that back. But if you gave the go ahead to a surprise then… it would make me see that we weren’t compatible. I like people who embrace ideas, not fun sponges!

Well, if you don't like hot weather, tbh it wasn't a very thoughtful surprise holiday! I'd feel the same and would prefer a European city break at this time of year.

Can you get used to the idea - do you usually like this kind of holiday? Either you're difficult to read or he doesn't know you very well.

"Well - I’m not sure why you need to be grateful for something you never asked for in the first place! So I’m a bit surprised at the responses"

My Mam once put my name down for a competition and I won some cash, I was very grateful even though it was something I never asked for in the first place, by your reckoning I shouldn't have been grateful? Strange way to look at things.

Op, maybe you could suggest he bring a friend instead who might appreciate it.

It’ll likely be a few degrees cooler than 26/27 so that’s one worry you can put aside.

Do you have unused holiday and is he paying for it all

I don't think I'd like any unexpected booked holiday unless it's been cleared in advance that we'd go ahead with a holiday in x weeks and he could book it himself.

You ask if you are ungrateful, well you know you aren't grateful so I'm not sure why you are asking? If you are looking for validation that you are right to be ungrateful well that's something else.

Well yes you are.

But seriously don't expect it to be that hot end Nov/ beginning of December.

I hope it's below 20 to be honest I don't do well in warm.
Even that's warm for me
I'm not a kill joy honestly -I just love this time of year