To think Jo Frost (Supernanny) was wrong to post inflammatory comments

[Margot78]

Jo Frost shared this on her FB page. I’m
not sure why, I was quite baffled by it. Surely she knows that parents of children with asd/adhd/ocd will be offended at the suggestion that they are chasing a label for their child? Not sure what she was trying to achieve with this!

Am I the only one who finds it odd that you all can take the piss out of her for her speech impediments. But she calls a kid naughty and all hell breaks lose? For what its worth I work with children and have done for over 11 years and yes some are just naughty brats with even worse parents.

I don't know why I read this thread. I knew some of the comments would be rude and insulting to neurodiverse people - and I was right.

"ABCD people" - fucking really?!?!

The process of getting diagnosed with ADHD, autism, or any associated condition where there's a dysfunction with executive functioning is bloody hard. It's long, difficult, and every other possibility is explored before a diagnosis is given.

Do you have ANY idea what it's like to be neurodiverse?!?! Do you??? To have a brain that doesn't work the way that everyone else's does? To have to try SOOOOO fucking hard just to function "normally" and to be able to manage the things that other people seem to do so easily???

I am autistic and have ADHD. I wouldn't change who I am but operating in this world is not easy at times, because of my needs, and for how I think and feel.

I have a good career, I have DC, I have a long term relationship, my own house etc. But look beneath that veneer and you will see how desperately hard I find the most basic things.

We have to deal with so much prejudice and shit like this just doesn't help.

Do you know there's a long-running thread on MN about how utterly shit it is to be a partner of someone who's neurodiverse? Because we're all a bunch of utter shitheads according to the people on that thread. But that's fine, because we're fair game. We're always fair game because our brain chemistry and brain wiring, our neurodevelopment differences seem to be there for people to mock, make fun or insist that we're over exaggerating.

I wasn't and have never been the classic "naughty" child. We don't all look like that so casually throwing all of those diagnoses in with naughty just perpetuates a stereotype that so many people believe.

It's so utterly bloody frustrating. And more than that, it's fucking IGNORANT.

She’s a bore 🥱🥱🥱 she doesn’t even have children does she? Her style of ‘parenting’ is basically a quick fix to a deep problem that lies with the parents themselves.

And I’ll bet she knows f* all about autism or ADHD. One of my children has both and she’s better behaved than most NT kids. Her struggles are internal.

@User478 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

You really missed the entire point. And maybe it’s hard to get these diagnoses where you are. But in the states doctors just hand them out like candy on Halloween night. I remember very clearly getting diagnosed with ADHD and it was a very short appointment. I had never met this man. There was no complicated process. He just saw me excited running around playing with the toys in the room and said “Yeah I agree with you. She has ADHD.” to my mother. And then prescribed me Ritalin.

She can have dyspraxia and a mother who doesn’t parent her properly. The two aren’t mutually exclusive

I think she's right. We do try to label everything

No I haven't missed the point at all. You've missed my point.

I'm not going to comment on what it's like in the States. I've never experienced it and I don't know anyone who has. I'm not qualified to speak on behalf of the processes in place in the USA, regardless of CDC best practice guidelines.

I'm in the UK and I know many, many parents who have faced years of assessment before doctors would issue a diagnosis. It's not easy to get a diagnosis here at all. Even if you go privately, there's an incredibly robust process in place which makes it very hard to get diagnosed. I don't know a single child who has been diagnosed quickly or easily. It requires the input of multiple health professionals across a broad spectrum of disciplines. If there's any other factors, they must be treated and ruled out first before they'll consider a neurodiverse diagnosis.

The constant narrative in the media that these diagnoses are handed out willy-nilly while potentially dangerous amphetamines are prescribed for children for no reason is just blatantly wrong. Flat out wrong. Yet a lot of the public believes this narrative and it harms people like me, my children, and the other neurodiverse children I know. And I'm referring to the UK. People in the UK BELIEVE these headlines, because people like Jo Frost keep spitting out these damaging quotes that provide the wrong impression.

Oh, and just as an aside, the term "ABCD people" is fucking rude, regardless of what the diagnosis process is.

It’s definitely different per area, I was diagnosed recently as an adult in two months flat (but pregnant so got thrown up the waiting list for priority) and my son was assessed on 6 weeks but they do it via school and then a separate service not via the GP.

alarming how inconsistent it is across the country. In a Fb group for women with adhd on the Uk and some have been waiting for 4 years

SpidersAreShitheads

Agree with you. My 8 year old still isn’t formally diagnosed with autism yet. School were the ones to kickstart the process when he was 3 years old. That’s 5 years!

We have seen speech therapists, psychologists, SENCo, paediatricians etc, and all agree on the diagnosis, but still awaiting it being officially diagnosed.

Definitely not handed out like candy at Halloween.

I’ve never liked Jo Frost abs not surprised by there comments that seem very 2008

A woman who enjoys humiliating families on TV is enough to know what she is about

Such a sensitive topic. Most parents with children with autism and adhd notice issues long before the professionals that's why they are seemingly self diagnosing. They become desperate because they need early intervention to help their child cope. I didn't find it to be a short process but long and painful. That being said any child can have naughty behaviour. My own son has autism and sometimes it's sensory overload and other times it's downright boldness 😄

YANBU and actually it’s a big concern that somebody with such ignorance and attitude towards neurodiversity is working with struggling children and their families. A big concern.

It’s laughable too. As others have said in the U.K. it is incredibly hard to get a diagnosis of any neurodiversity. 2 year wait aside the process is thorough and arduous. No parent wants their child to have a life long condition. Trust me I’d rather my children were naughty and my parenting was poor as that I could change.

The attitude illustrated by Jo Frost has what has lead to daughter child going undiagnosed for years,hospitalised multiple times with anorexia and mental illness for my son creeping up unchecked. I did the naughty step etc and thought I could parent my way out of the challenges my children presented. It makes me so upset now when I think how hard it must have been for them. My daughter has dyspraxia and autism, we are due to hear if she has ADD too.She only got her autism diagnosis at 17. They can all overlap which is why it can look is if labels have been collected. It’s worrying a professional with children doesn’t know that. I’m so proud of my daughter and all she has achieved.

I’ve lost count of how many professionals, parents and nurses who have told me how lovely my daughter is. She wasn’t an easy child because she was having needs unmet and being forced to mask conditions in a NT world. She was not naughty.

Giving her the benefit of the doubt in imagining that she's really saying "of course many children have genuine conditions like ASD, ADHD, but I've also met parents who use those labels to excuse poor parenting or attachment disorders instead" ... well it's still a shit message to send to the people you're trying to sell to.

She has to say this because the kids who were in her shows are now old enough to be speaking out on TikTok and they're telling their stories of how a lot of it was set up and edited together to make the kids look worse, and people are doing commentary on her old show where they're pointing out how terrible it was to see a child crying and have a lot of big feelings and then sticking them on a "naughty step" as punishment for those feelings that were usually down to parents lack of understanding or sympathy.
I think this is just arrogance. She thinks her way worked and she was praised for it once. But we're seeing the kids grown up and they disagree.
She's old school style and it's outdated. She did label kids as naughty and nasty and made out attention seeking was a bad thing. I suspect she hoped to make some kind of comeback show and realised people don't agree with her style anymore when we've realised that kids acting out is usually down to unmet needs or underlining issues, and thank god for that because I prefer respecting children and helping them instead of pointing a finger in their face and shouting no at them.

This is my ex-friend with her child.

she was really inconsistent and inattentive parenting him and he she just wanted a quiet life so he was constantly given high sugary snacks and sweets to shut him up when she was out for coffee so he’d sit there eating them. At home he was shoved on a device or iPad. When he used to ask to do stuff she wouldn’t.

course he was never burning any of it off and was bored so started acting out, she’d then tell him to shut up, say his behaviour was bad, he was overweight from no exercise.

she was so inconsistent with allowing him to sleep in her bed as well. He just got constant mixed messages.

she was determined he has ADHD, made a huge fuss to all who would listen and managed to get him medicated.

Now the poor sod is doped up all the time e as she has an excuse for her lazy and piiir parenting.

Yes I know I’ll get heat for this but as the poster above I refuse to believe all these children have all these issues.

“All these children”

“All these issues”

What do you mean by that?

She has a point kind of. I'm visually impaired and one of the difficulties I have is reading. I (everyone at college had this) had Dyslexia screening done, it came back as I may have a mild form of it. "Senco" told me this means I'm Dyslexic and not visually impaired. I was referred for a full assessment. My report said I can't be Dyslexic and every issue can be explained by my visual impairment. (for example, I can't copy a pattern with Lego or similar but give me letters or numbers and I can put them in the correct order.)

Despite the report stating this I was told I still needed to get a letter from my GP stating I'm visually impaired. A letter from the eye hospital (recognised by DWP, local council, TV licence and railcards) wasn't good enough.

But this is the same woman who decided I can't be autistic because she has a male (I'm female) relative who may have it and I'm nothing like him. She claims I have anxiety and just need counselling. Funny how people who know me would disagree.

My children need to remember and learn about their diagnosis in order to recover.

They need their medication to keep them safe and help them
get well.

Thank you, you expressed what I felt exactly.

This. Well said.

And it's not missing the point.

I agree with her, naughty at times is exactly what toddlers and small children are... yes they may also be tired / starting to become unwell etc etc which can contribute to behaviour but constant need to now look for neurodivergence at some young ages is so wrong.

I work in a GP surgery and the amount of parents that call wanting to speak to a mental health clinician or GP because they think little susie is on the spectrum because she doesn't listen very well at 2.5yrs of age and she has threw a couple of toys etc. I recently had a call for a 3 month and a 9 month wanting testing for Autism which of course was declined. It's bloody insane everyone is looking for. Label rather than letting children learn and grow and heaven forbid keeping children in line with discipline.

My friend has a 11year old and yes he does now display some ADHD traits but he is allowed to rule the roost and call all the shots so no bloody wonder. She has now had another child and before 1 year was saying oh she has autism like her brother etc etc the kid doesn't stand a chance of avoiding this label.

You’d be surprised how many parents prefer ‘ABCD’ diagnoses rather than actually parenting their kids. They muddy the water for genuine diagnosis and create the backlog in the system with their determination that there ‘must’ be something wrong. I have an adult child who has an ASD/ADHD diagnosis and another who, while almost certainly on the spectrum, we chose not to pursue a diagnosis for. We did this because we had learned from all the mistakes we made with the first one and knew he could achieve more without the label.

I do wonder what will happen to the kids local to me who spend their time vandalising, harassing shop workers, swearing indiscriminately and generally being unpleasant to whoever they pass. When questioned the first thing they say is “I’ve got ADHD I can’t help it” but ADHD doesn’t predispose you to vandalism or violent behaviour - those are choices you make and these children haven’t been empowered to live beyond their diagnosis, just live up to it. I find it very sad.