To wonder why some people don't work full-time?

[donniedarko89]

I was part-time myself while DD was very young as I wanted to spend time with her. I know many mums however who have stayed part time even after the kids go to school. They only work 2 or 3 days a week. The thing is, they're not loaded, on the contrary they keep complaining that finances are tight and they can't afford stuff - then why not increase your work days (they could all easily do it)? Some of them even have a cleaner. No hobbies on the side either. It genuinely puzzles me!

I do 0700 till 1345 running a school kitchen I do have an army pension that is more than my wage though so this enables this .I also have a hip condition hence the war pension so it still keeps me working but I have a buffer if I couldn't. I wish this was an option when the kids were younger i missed so much. But now a much better work /life balance.

@StillMedusa

I am 34 and one day working in a special primary school has my whole body in bits. I’ve decided not to pursue it (I work on supply). Honestly it’s very physical work PT sounds like a good idea for sure.

If they have a few primary age kids then wrap around and holiday care can mean it's just not financially worthwhile. Or children in that awkward 11/12 yr old age where they are too old for childcare but leaving them alone 8-6 daily isn't really an option.

I think it depends on your job/career. My job requires me to work a number of unpaid extra hours each day- if I was full time I would not have anything like a ‘work-life balance’. I tried it gif a couple of years when my children first went to school and made myself I’ll trying to fit everything in. Being part time isn’t financially ideal but it does mean I can get all my work done, get life admin sorted, house cleaned, husband supported and I have time for my children. No family around to help is also another factor.

If I increased my hours, and had to put my kids in ooh care, I wouldn't be substantially better off, so I choose to work less, and be able to drop them off and pick them up each day. They have playdates and hobbies after school that they wouldn't be able to do if I was working full time, and I like spending time with them while they're young. No other reasons needed!

Not every job is full time, zero contract hours, seasonal jobs.

I can't imagine sitting at home alone while my kids were at school, but it's each to their own isn't it. My DM was a SAHM all my life, and it was what she enjoyed, keeping the home, cooking, and being there for us when we went out on a morning and again in the afternoon. 🤷‍♀️ I couldn't do it but she loved it.

Mines just gone to school. I do 4 days. Can't be arsed doing 5 as I'm knackered all the time.

I get it ,work part time but don't moan about finances!!

@Dixiechickonhols

god yes such an awkward age isn’t it? Too old for the clubs but too young unsupervised all day. Mine would kill each other.

When I was married my then husband expected me to work part time and do all childcare and housework and appointments etc. One of my dc has Sn and very challenging and both have mh problems and even now I am at appointments for the dc every week. I also fit/fitted in looking after my elderly parents and childcare for a family member.

I realise that next year I will have to increase my hours a bit. Due to various reasons, my girls are mid teens now. But still the Sn one has problems where FT for me is not an option.

I was lucky as I was mainly wfh but I think it's trickiest age for holiday childcare especially if not sporty.

OP- I have never worked full time because:
a) I wanted to be able to collect dd from school every day and spend time taking her to activities like dancing, the park and to play with friends etc.
b) I didn't want her going to before and after school clubs every day and doing 10 hour days at school.
c) I want time to cook from scratch every day, clean and wash and iron so our weekends were not spent doing chores.

These were more important that extra money to me!

OP I could have written this post!!! I have friends with children at Junior’s, Secondary and College all complaining that money is tight and sneering at what I spend my money on yet are happy to work PT with absolutely no intention of working an hour more than they have to (even though they are permitted to increase their hours). I’ve concluded that it’s laziness, there is no work/life balance as they have no hobbies.

I can definitely see why people work part time even once the kids are at school but I do hope that they consider the impact on their pension.

Quite a few women I know carried on doing 2/3 days per week and now they're mid fifties they're concerned that their pension isn't going to be good enough to support them when they retire.

Work life balance. I want to be able to drop the kids off and pick them up straight from school a few days of the week and to get some of the jobs at home done before the weekend so we can enjoy the time together. To me the extra family time is worth more than the extra money. There’s so much more to life than money.

I’m part time and my son is at school. But I like to pick him up and spend time with him after school. He is also on the spectrum (which wouldn’t be obvious to you as an outsider) so would make life difficult for hun sending him to after school club. Things might look ‘simple’ enough for you to think ‘why not go full time’ but they’re not always plain cut. And sometimes they are and people just don’t want to work more - what’s it to you?

I apologise my full stop is in the wrong place, there should be a comma before due.

mine is year 7 and he’s left in after school club they have lots of kids in his year still hanging about, school allows kids in earlier but I guess it depends on the school and what’s normal for that age as mine probably wouldn’t want to be in care club if it was just the primary school kids

Agree with you OP, DH’s best friend’s wife has one DC, never went back to work and she seems like the most boring human I’ve ever met… kiddo is in school full time (7 or 8) and she seems to just slob around home, watches TV all day… house is messy, doesn’t do activities with the kid. It’s definitely of my business but I do find it odd. I technically work full time but actually work less than 30 hours a week with no commute, I do spend extra time with DC but also swim, run, just picked up rowing, ski in winter, read, sew, knit, do more interesting cooking and baking projects. If I worked truly PT I’d do all that and more. But I don’t like to feel idle 🤷‍♀️.

Yes I think it's important to have enough household income to both go part-time, and pay additional pension contributions. I pay into a private pension in addition to my Teachers Pension for this reason, but I'm lucky in that I can afford to.

I wouldn’t over think it if I was you.

Because we were sold a dream that we should work to fulfil our lives as women, but actually many women are really fulfilled through being a care maker or home maker, and seeing their children grow up. But now we are in a situation where to survive we have to have a two parent working home, in order to find said home and raise children? So women try to work part time to get the best of both worlds and often end up with the worst of both?

It's not worth me financially going back to work full time. We are worse of financially if I do. I had thought when all the were in school/pre school nursery we would be better me going more hours. We would be £246 a week in the school term for after breakfast club/afterschool clubs and average £600 a week for care in holidays.

That's assuming we can find a club that could care for DS1 who had complex additional support needs and requires one to one support in school. Financially we are better of me carrying on working ever second weekend as we have no childcare costs. Add to that neither DH or I have any desire for the kids to be in holiday clubs/wrap sound care 5 days a week 8am to 5.30 pm most of the time when it's not necessary financially (no judgement to anyone who has to do this).

Add on top of that my eldest has a lot of medical appointments and my middle child had asthma which causes him to be of sick a lot in the winter. We have nobody that could care for them so would have to take unpaid leave (we haven't had one week the kids have been all in school all week since schools went back mud August).

Do you actually think people who work FT don’t want to see their children?

I’m a single parent. Do you think I work FT to avoid seeing my child or just possibly because I don’t have a choice.

Dont be ignorant.