What would you think if you saw this on your DH's phone?

[Franciscaa]

My DH messaged a woman on WhatsApp asking about a job. It's a woman he used to work with a few years ago. She's 8 years younger than us.

I know I shouldn't have looked but I knew something was up. She replied telling him about the job (in a polite and professional way) and he then asked her another question. She didn't reply so he sent her loads of question marks and "well?" and "..." about 15 in a row.

He then said "are you teasing me?"

It is either a very ‘close’ friendship that is intimate enough to tolerant that level of unprofessionalism and humour - not necessarily sexual
They are close in all other ways
He is a stalker and doesn’t understand boundaries whatsoever

The word ‘teasing’ was uncomfortable to read - clearly flirting with total confidence. Sorry op.

It was separate messages. Like..

...
well?
...
So?
...
...
...
...
hello

All sent individually.

She aired him

Very unprofessional and probably harassment.

Did he get fired from last job for sexual harrassment as might be that he's up to same tricks.

I would think he was a nagging pest.

He does not sound remotely trustworthy either way

He doesn't understand boundaries and social niceties, does he? Does he act the same with you as well? I would definitely question him about why he thinks that's a good way to respond to someone who could help with a job. More importantly, would he have done that if the person was male. (I suspect not).

He sounds like a dick, a pest and a sleaze.

I would be mortified and repulsed if my husband behaved like that.

Sorry OP.

Err deffo comes across as massively creepy. However I don't think it's alluding to anything happening between them previously, not on her end anyway. Still I'd be fucking fuming.

He sounds completely oblivious and obnoxious

A bad combo but not necessarily an affair

Just a nuisance

Feel for you OP - not the best situation to be in. I don’t get ‘affair’ vibes but I do get hugely inappropriate/unprofessional/awkward/embarrassing vibes!

Are you able to ask him how the chat went and see if he opens up a bit about the (one sided) conversation?

^ This

The poor woman. How annoying. No surprise she didn't respond.

I don't get affair vibes either, but it's so rude and immature.

I’m intrigued by you saying ‘I didn’t want to look, but I knew something was up’

Therein lies the key to what you do next..

How did you know? What has happened previously to give you suspicion?

if you’ve had instincts and feelings before about things, now might be a good time to really listen to them.

sending many hugs. It’s shitty and my best mate has been through something similar. She has come a long way since then. You may too have a journey ahead of you. Solidarity x

I’d block him if I was her, he sounds far too full on

I'd think he was a needy bellend

He has give me the ick and I don’t know a thing about him.

I’d think something happened previously and he thinks this gives him both a leg up and a way back in. He thinks she owes him, she isn’t interested.

I've just had another look. He's still messaging her this evening.

She hasn't said anything which could be misconstrued, however he said "I have been preparing for the interview just so you know. Hopefully you'll be there.."

She said "ok, good luck"

I actually feel sick. He doesn't speak like this normally. It's coming across as creepy, isn't it?

He probably shouldn't bet on getting that job. Incredibly unprofessional at best.

He wants to see her. Is this new job at her place of work?

Yes, sorry OP he's a total creep

It is, yes