AIBU?
Neighbour bought a trampoline to look over our fence
LazyJayne · 11/10/2022 17:45
Have had issues with overly friendly neighbour since we moved in. The original divider between our back gardens was a low hedge, and she would come out and talk to us every single time we were out in the garden. And boy, can she talk. She also used to lift her DC over the hedge without asking to play with our DC (who is years older and not interested).
Eventually, we put up a 6ft fence on our side of the hedge. I’d tried to warm her up to the idea of this beforehand by saying we were thinking of getting a dog and needed a fence to keep it in.
When we put up the fence she initially made few jokey comments about how it was harder to talk to us now, but she solved this problem by placing a step on her side and continued to pop up whenever we were out in garden.
My husband then planted bamboo along the fence which shot up over the summer and is now about 8ft.
Last month, we saw from our bedroom window that a large trampoline had appeared in her garden. We assumed it was for her DC and thought nothing of it. However, they don’t use it, she does.
When I was out in the garden a few weeks ago, up she popped over the top of the bamboo, laughing hysterically, and shouting ‘see what I’ve had to resort to! hahaha!’ I said something along the lines of ‘oh yes haha, is that a trampoline for X’ and she said it was originally but he wasn’t interested so she’s going to use it for exercise instead.
So far all her exercises have coincided with us being out in the garden.
We’re now back at square one and whenever we’re out she appears over the bamboo, laughing and shouting.
My husband is very non confrontational and says the bamboo will keep growing and eventually she won’t be able to see over it, but I think this will take year as she must be hitting the 20ft mark at full jump height. We would also start losing light if we let it get that high.
WIBU to tell her directly to give us some privacy? Is there a gentle way to do it that won’t hurt her feelings that we’re missing?
Am I being unreasonable?
AIBUYou have one vote. All votes are anonymous.
Thehop · 11/10/2022 18:54
“Haha you’ve resorted to a trampoline? That is funny, we keep trying to find ways to keep the back garden private and just chat in the front garden!”
“Oh no, you’ll wear yourself out! We’ll just keep to chatting when we see you in the front, I actually quite like the peace out here in the back now”
LadyVictoriaSponge · 11/10/2022 19:07
LazyJayne · 11/10/2022 18:01
To clarify, we don’t dislike this woman, we think she’s funny and bubbly and enjoy saying hello and having a quick chat in the FRONT garden. We just want to enjoy the back garden as a family.
Say what you have said here to her.
HangOnToYourself · 11/10/2022 19:09
I'm trying not to laugh, OP, really I am but I cant help but imagine yu and your DH sitting down to finally relax with your expensive new fence finally finished and still muddy from planting the bamboo, cup of tea in hand, and the frozen smiles of horror as she starts bobbing up and down 🙈😂
Mountainpika · 11/10/2022 19:17
How about getting a trampoline yourselves and encouraging her to bounce from hers to yours - and have yours in such a position that she bounces over into the next garden?
And eventually all the neighbours will have them and with a bit of luck she'll vanish for ever over the fences.
latetothefisting · 11/10/2022 19:18
while I get she can see you now just standing on the trampoline, I think your dh is right and it would only need to grow a foot or so more for her not to be able to do this - while she might still be able to see you when she jumps I doubt she can carry on a conversation while jumping, so just pretend you can't hear her over the noise of the trampoline. You can't have a conversation with a head that bobs up every few seconds and is out of breath!
But yes I'd probably have to have a word with her before she starts building the tree house...
unfortunately it doesn't sound like she's the type that will take a subtle hint...
onlythreenow · 11/10/2022 19:19
Just here to point out that bamboo is very invasive! Before you know it, it will have taken over your whole garden!!!
Not to mention hers. I had no end of trouble with it growing under my neighbour's fence and in my lawn, garden, and even inside my garage!
BlodynGwyn · 11/10/2022 19:34
My parent's neighbor started having trouble with her mental health. She started shouting abuse at my mother every time she saw her in the garden, so my parents put up a tall fence and shrubbery which quickly grew tall. Not to be defeated the woman had their in ground pool filled in and a huge rockery built where it had been, so she could stand on the top of it and hurl abuse at my mother. One of the things she shouted was, "I'm going to tell your husband when he gets home that you have been wasting time sunbathing".
Eventually the hedge grew too tall for her to see over and they sold the house and moved. Her husband was lovely man, a true gentleman, but he didn't know what to do, so he did the kindest thing he could for the village and moved.
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