To think two hours homework a night is not excessive for a year 10 pupil

[Challenger5]

DD 1 is adamant that two hours a night homework, is against her human rights. She has been stomping around, refusing to start her homework. DD 1 is being exceptionally rude to me swearing at me for sending her to a prison camp and claiming to be-having a nervous breakdown due to the schools expectations.

I am trying to calm her down and reason with her, that two hours a night is quite proportionate for a year 10 girl at a Grammar School. This especially as the school as stated her target grades are 7-9 in all ten GCSE subjects.

She has also informed me that her head of year as given her a after school detention, today for calling her English teacher a 'mean cow' for a poor homework mark. DD denies calling the teacher that, saying she was misheard when she pulled her face at the teacher.

DD is saying the detention is unfair and against her human rights because it is grossly an excessive punishment even if she had accidentally muttered 'mean cow' when the teacher spoke to her. DD argues that her face pulling was justified because someone has to stand up against the schools unrealistic and unreasonable levels of homework demanded.

My bedroom consists of a bed, fitted wardrobe and chest of drawers and just about enough space to walk round it all. DD is welcome to sit on the bed with a bean bag lap tray, but I don't think that's really an ideal way to work.
She actually works on the dining table which means she has to work round the space being used/ the house being noisy generally. She also works in the public library sometimes (although it shuts at 5 and is only open 4 days a week).

And there are plenty of other students much worse off than her!

The point was raised because of the assumption that every child had a quiet study space in their bedroom or even a whole other room.

Yes I agree with giving them space where possible to ensure they can work comfortably, they are lucky as have their own rooms but the lack of understanding on here is unreal, is it really too much to realise that many kids live in far from ideal conditions to study quietly at all, let alone for 2 hrs. If schools are unable to provide a good enough education for ALL students then it is just not good enough. For those who can/want to then fine, let them crack on, support and encourage them in whatever way you can but don't for one minute think it is possible for everyone.

And I would absolutely discourage my DCs not to study if if was too much for them, their mental health is way more important, if I could see they were burning out I absolutely would intervene, why would you not? DS2 would have meltdowns if he had too much homework, he finds it very hard to study at home regardless of him having peace and quiet. In addition to that the career DS1 is going into us very volatile and can be stressful, in fact we have lost 3 people local to us within the community DS works in, to suicide in the last 8 weeks which shows me that mental health should be top of our priorities, esp for teens.

That said, it does sound like the OPs DD is actually just making excuses as opposed to struggling so it's likely to be another issue rather than the amount of homework.

I know it's not ideal. I really wish there was better solutions for kids. But we have to work with what we've got.

Two hours a night at GCSE level is appropriate, 3/4 hours at post 16 level. Your daughter has 4-10 pm each night, plus weekend all day. 10 hours a week, approximately managed doesn't mean 2 hrs every night. Teachers usually give a week for most hw, so lots can be done on Saturday or Sunday. Daughter is being unreasonable. Fancy that.

My daughter had two hours most nights for the seven years she spent at a high-performing single-sex Grammar School. She's not naturally academic, but has a strong work ethic.
Many of her Asian friends were being forced to do four hours each night, they deserved their 15 A and 5 A GCSE and A-level results. Several earn close to £100k only a couple of years out of Uni.
It's not for every child, but many lived in overcrowded, lower-income homes and grew up with expectations to support parents and siblings. Parental ambition can be a hard taskmaster.

I have studied successfully on a range of courses up to masters level and have never studied anything like 3-4 hours a day in addition to a day of tuition. My view is that if you need to do so much extra work then you probably aren't on a course that is within your capacity.

I did 2 hours every night from year 8, in the mid 1990s. Niece in year 10 has about the same I think? So it seems fairly standard.

laughing at her ‘human rights’ being violated - ask her to pinpoint which article in the Human Rights Act is being breached?

and she needs to not be disrespectful to her teachers….

I'm not sure about 3-4hrs after college but I have done 3/4 hrs at uni a day, this is up to Masters level, but my experience of uni is not days of tuition, I had 4 hours a week of tutor time and 2x 1hr lectures a week. It wasn't like school, college or work you went away and thought for yourself, in fact if you could not do this you would be deemed not competent in completing that type of degree.

@blameless

Absolutely- DH is from South Korea where DC are expected to study for 16 hours every day. He can’t believe the laziness and poor work ethic from many DC and parents in the UK.

Clearly we don’t want to copy the full Korean system in the UK, but it does mean that the DC complaining about doing 2 hours of homework does not get much sympathy.

DS1 (year 11) has actually been doing doing some zoom study sessions with his cousin in South Korea who’s the same age. He says it really motivates him to work harder.

This thread is being Discussed on LBC radio right now

The conclusion from LBC (Rachel Johnson and Kristy Alsopp) is that everyone hates homework, it causes conflict and stress - teachers, pupils and parents alike think it should be scrapped.

2 hours is too much especially after the school day, they should use the time for physical activity.

I know it's not funny but... I quite like the sound of your daughter. I had a rebellious, argumentative phase at that age too... my Mum just let me get on with it. She figured it was better I was "fighting the good fight" (I really thought I was starting revolutions in school) than drinking and taking drugs.

She'll grow out of it I'm sure. I certainly did (although I still have my moments)

What a load of rubbish.