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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this is alot of money for an afternoon tea?

185 replies

Mummyof287 · 29/09/2022 11:28

A Hen do is being planned for next year for a close friend (I am one of the bridesmaids, but another whom I don't know is planning the hen party)
I'm very honoured to be her bridesmaid, and obviously i'm going to attend but can only go for the afternoon tea daytime part (Some are staying overnight, which the organiser said would be paying a higher price but not sure how she has worked it all out)

I am just abit shocked at the price of the afternoon tea, which she has said will be £40- then they are splitting the cost of the Bride (which I am MORE than happy to contribute towards) which brings the total p/p for day guests to £60.
Tbh i was expecting the cost to be about £25 max (then the contribution for the bride on top)
The going rate around here is £15-20/head for afternoon tea, or £25ish at the poshest venues I guess.
I mean its £45 p/p at The Ritz in central london! :-/

AIBU to be thinking of asking the organiser where the place is and ringing to confirm the cost is correct?
Money is tight, and whilst I want to be there for my lovely friend, pay my way and contribute to her having a wonderful hen do, I don't want to be paying towards everyone else.

OP posts:
threatmatrix · 30/09/2022 19:22

Ramsbottom · 30/09/2022 18:53

So you think you’re being gouged and scammed. How odd. Just call and confirm instead of starting threads. If you are right, speak to them if you’re wrong, have a think about yourself.

Not a nice comment, you don’t know about her finances.

x2boys · 30/09/2022 19:30

Dixiechickonhols · 29/09/2022 11:41

I’m up in Lancashire and never seen for £15/20. Midland in Morcambe (art deco) is also lovely and £30 ish I think.

We had afternoon tea for £15 last year at thr plaza in Manchester, for my birthday and my friends 50 th it was one of those deal thingies that we had to book ,we also got a glass of prosecco.

NoDairyNoProblem · 30/09/2022 19:44

Sparking afternoon tea is £60 at a nice costal hotel near us. £40 without.

Blondeshavemorefun · 30/09/2022 19:45

As others said £40 for afternoon tea isn’t bad

how many are going times that by £20 - take off 40 for afternoon tea and assume that’s her hotel paid for

CocoFifi · 30/09/2022 19:47

Depends on the type of afternoon tea, there are so many options, so I do not think the price is too bad, if it is with a glass of champagne or something like that

Hillary17 · 30/09/2022 20:01

That is quite a lot. You can do a bottomless afternoon tea / brunch for around £35 near me for 90 minutes!

TheLassWiADelicateAir · 30/09/2022 20:32

VanGoghsDog · 29/09/2022 11:33

I don't think the Ritz is £45. I paid £60 at Browns earlier this year.

The Ritz starts at £67. Recent afternoon teas I've had have been in the £27-£45 bracket, without fizz.

Oh and I know grammar police are frowned on but "alot" is not a word.

Somethingneedstochange · 30/09/2022 20:36

That is a lot for afternoon tea. It's £55 for two at the poshest hotel in our town. You don't get much though. A local garden centre do a really good one for £15 each. Even take some pictures for you if you want.

TraceyGerbil · 30/09/2022 20:44

I took my mother for lunch at Claridges, as it worked out cheaper than the afternoon tea.

PrincessScarlett · 30/09/2022 20:47

Average afternoon tea without alcohol costs £30 round my way. Posh afternoon tea or with prosecco would cost £40 upwards so think the price is fair. It may be that the extra £20 is paying for some silly extras as well as the afternoon tea or maybe some extra prosecco for everyone. Just ask the person organising.

outtheshowernow · 30/09/2022 20:52

I wouldn't go for afternoon tea I don't eat cakes and wouldn't pay 40 quid for a sandwich tbh when I could get one in Morrison's for 2 quid

Original poster
Mummyof287 · 30/09/2022 21:08

Thanks everyone for all the many replies! So upon querying where the place is the other BM who is taking the lead in organising the Hen party said she would ask the lady who is organising it, but the response she got was that they 'can't disclose venues until its all booked and paid for, but will be a 'chain venue in the city centre' This 'Hen party organiser' has also arranged the apartment...its some sort of package thing. So hopefully it's reputable, but all I can do is go along with it and pay my share really.I am in East of England not London, and £40 a head is definitely steep, especially when it's clearly not going to be somewhere that luxurious...guessing there may be some sort of commission or something added by this party planner.
But I'm sure it will be a nice celebration none the less, and the main thing is we can give the bride a lovely hen party she deserves 😊

OP posts:
LuluBlakey1 · 30/09/2022 21:40

It's about £70 for basic afternoon tea at The Ritz these days- and a glass of champagne adds something like £20-£95 depending on the type. It's a lot more than £40. PIL went recently.

Locally to us a nice afternoon tea in a smart place would be about £30-35 and a glass of champagne/prosecco £15 extra so I don't think what you are quoting is unreasonable.

Given what afternoon tea costs to make it's a rip-off but you pay for the experience. I prefer it without the alcohol.

Seems like a lot extra to pay fir the bride unless there are only 2 or 3 of you

Dibbydoos · 30/09/2022 21:55

It is expensive. Most expensive one Ive bought was £32 & that inc gin.

Def ask where it is. Say it's expensive - they might have ordered some added extras....

ToGanymedeAndTitan · 30/09/2022 22:37

It is expensive. Most expensive one Ive bought was £32 & that inc gin.
Bloody hell, that's cheap! I say this as a Yorkshire bird who likes afternoon tea and alcohol lol

Ramsbottom · 30/09/2022 22:51

Dibbydoos · 30/09/2022 21:55

It is expensive. Most expensive one Ive bought was £32 & that inc gin.

Def ask where it is. Say it's expensive - they might have ordered some added extras....

Wow that’s so cheap. I take my daughter a couple of times a year and pay at least double that.

caringcarer · 30/09/2022 22:59

I'm in West Midlands and the afternoon teas near to me with glass of Prosecco are usually about £37.50 but you can often get a Woucher deal for £25-30.

GreenFly56 · 30/09/2022 23:05

It sounds like its being bookes through one of these websites that arranges hen do's wirh various activities. My DH went on a stag do year ago and they Definately didnt get what they paid for with some of their activities. A booze cruise turned out to be one beer on a rowing boat. But it was abroad so hopefully they are better in the UK. £40 for afternoom tea is reasonable outside of London with one glass of prosecco at a nice place thats not super fancy I would say.

Somethingneedstochange · 30/09/2022 23:07

Not everyone likes prosecco I can't stand it. Makes me feel sick.

Melx42 · 01/10/2022 07:54

I would never use a “party organiser” they take so much commission and you don’t have any choice in venues etc. A close friend used one during covid and when it was cancelled she had a real fight to get her money back.

Kittysummer · 01/10/2022 07:58

You would be better getting a meal out somewhere. It would be better value.

rookiemere · 01/10/2022 07:59

Goodness, how odd that one needs an organiser to book an afternoon tea and an overnight stay for a group.

It all sounds a bit silly, but at this point you just state your budget "Ok I can save up for the £60" and pray it doesn't come out at much more than that. At least you've said upfront you're not doing the overnight stay.

Augend23 · 01/10/2022 08:00

Mummyof287 · 30/09/2022 21:08

Thanks everyone for all the many replies! So upon querying where the place is the other BM who is taking the lead in organising the Hen party said she would ask the lady who is organising it, but the response she got was that they 'can't disclose venues until its all booked and paid for, but will be a 'chain venue in the city centre' This 'Hen party organiser' has also arranged the apartment...its some sort of package thing. So hopefully it's reputable, but all I can do is go along with it and pay my share really.I am in East of England not London, and £40 a head is definitely steep, especially when it's clearly not going to be somewhere that luxurious...guessing there may be some sort of commission or something added by this party planner.
But I'm sure it will be a nice celebration none the less, and the main thing is we can give the bride a lovely hen party she deserves 😊

If you're East of England and anywhere near Norwich, the assembly house do a fabulous afternoon tea, and I think it's £25 without booze.

Iamnewhere · 01/10/2022 08:02

I would pay 40 if it included alcohol. 30ish without. But I'm not in Lodon. Anything more than 40 is steep unless it is bottomless!

LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet · 01/10/2022 08:06

YANBU about the afternoon tea cost - I paid £28 recently and was hungry after, it was about £4 worth of sandwiches and piddly little cakes.

YA also NBU about the other costs - I hate having to pay for the bride. I’ve been a bridesmaid a few times and I always think that bride, who has asked her mates to be there and is undoubtedly forking out a fortune for the wedding, should certainly paid the £50 or whatever herself to be there.

The whole expensive hen night culture makes me a bit sick TBH. When I got hitched it was meeting the girls down the pub and the most extravagant thing the guests would be the bride is a pound shop veil and L plate. I think it’s inconsiderate as fuck to expect people to fork out hundreds for someone else’s ‘last night of freedom’.