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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this is alot of money for an afternoon tea?

185 replies

Mummyof287 · 29/09/2022 11:28

A Hen do is being planned for next year for a close friend (I am one of the bridesmaids, but another whom I don't know is planning the hen party)
I'm very honoured to be her bridesmaid, and obviously i'm going to attend but can only go for the afternoon tea daytime part (Some are staying overnight, which the organiser said would be paying a higher price but not sure how she has worked it all out)

I am just abit shocked at the price of the afternoon tea, which she has said will be £40- then they are splitting the cost of the Bride (which I am MORE than happy to contribute towards) which brings the total p/p for day guests to £60.
Tbh i was expecting the cost to be about £25 max (then the contribution for the bride on top)
The going rate around here is £15-20/head for afternoon tea, or £25ish at the poshest venues I guess.
I mean its £45 p/p at The Ritz in central london! :-/

AIBU to be thinking of asking the organiser where the place is and ringing to confirm the cost is correct?
Money is tight, and whilst I want to be there for my lovely friend, pay my way and contribute to her having a wonderful hen do, I don't want to be paying towards everyone else.

OP posts:
Original poster
Mummyof287 · 29/09/2022 12:58

cluckinhell0 · 29/09/2022 11:37

Presumably because the bride is staying for the whole hen do unlike the OP, so not just afternoon tea, that includes her overnight stay, evening plans etc

Show quote history

Yes this is correct! That's why it's £20 odd split between several people.I've no issue contributing a fair bit to the Bride as she is a lovely, generous and close friend, and obviously I have a key role in the wedding.

Apologies, my mistake... i realised that price is actually the 'children's' afternoon tea cost at The Ritz, haha! I did think that was rather good value!
But £15-20 is definitely the going rate in my area....£25-30 tops for somewhere posh in the city.

As far as I am aware it is literally just the afternoon tea for the day guests, but it's at the same place where the others are staying, which I guess made me abit suspicious of how its being split.
I've now asked where it is so I can find out some further info From the venue.

OP posts:
Spanielsarepainless · 29/09/2022 13:01

I can't see where the £60 comes from. If each person is paying £40 then contributing to the bride, I make that only two people going (£40+£20). If ten people are going, they would be paying £40 plus a tenth of that for the bride, which I make £44 per day guest.

ditalini · 29/09/2022 13:02

I had afternoon tea at Betty's in York a couple of months ago which was £38. Before I went it felt expensive, but the sandwiches, scones, cakes and teas were all absolutely delicious and everything was refillable so we were completely stuffed when we left.

We treated it as a late lunch and didn't need a proper evening meal so it worked out cheap in terms of the whole day. If I'd been going at say 3pm I probably wouldn't have been able to eat very much and felt that it was steep but worth it for the treat.

NCFT0922 · 29/09/2022 13:03

It’s £60 for your friends hen do. YABU.

Surtsey · 29/09/2022 13:04

£40 for afternoon tea? Stuff that for a game of soldiers.

Original poster
Mummyof287 · 29/09/2022 13:05

I think I'm also scarred by my own hen do, where one of my so called 'friends' conned the guests out of money by saying she was collecting extra to cover mine, which she then pocketed herself!
(Needless to say I ditched her soon after!) And I know of course most people would never do such a thing.Just made me abit more cautious I guess.

OP posts:
Goldyfishy · 29/09/2022 13:06

This sounds right to me - that is the price to be locally and doesn’t include Prosecco, that would be about £65 I think. I’m nowhere near central London.

Goldyfishy · 29/09/2022 13:08

Remember how much food prices have increased everywhere too, I’ve gasped when looking at menus recently when just out for lunch or breakfast.

£12.50 for mushrooms on toast was a recent shock. “Wild mushrooms on ciabatta” was the description, but still !

TenoringBehind · 29/09/2022 13:13

Sounds about right to me. Here (Midlands) it is typically £20-25 without alcohol and £35-40 with sparkling wine. That’s in fairly ordinary venues too, rather than anywhere terribly special .

Ponoka7 · 29/09/2022 13:14

I've just priced around in Liverpool and the average is £35. So £60 sounds about right. I did vote YANBU because it's your right to ask where you are going.

Dixiechickonhols · 29/09/2022 13:14

Once you find venue out and check price I wouldn’t jump to thinking you are being ripped off people have made valid points about why a hen party may be more than advertised price eg extra drinks, private room, decorations. Hope you have a nice time.

savethebeesandthecees · 29/09/2022 13:14

Afternoon tea can be quite large amounts of food you can take away too. £45 sounds right for London

EmeraldShamrock1 · 29/09/2022 13:17

I went to an afternoon tea recently with a set menu at 55 euro including a glass of wine.

I ordered a second glass of white wine it cost 25 for the second glass.

They're not for the normal Josephine Soap.

burnoutbabe · 29/09/2022 13:21

I would only pay for brides share of what o attended but I suppose £5 v £20 is fairly close compared to sone hen so prices.

Don't forget lots of afternoons tea charge extra for a glass of champagne.Prosecco and then you have service charge and I assume someone will say let's get more drinks etc. so could be more on the day unless people are sensible and refuse added bits (which is hard as looks kill joy)

XelaM · 29/09/2022 13:24

On a side note, does anyone have any recommendations for cheap afternoon tea in London, as my birthday is coming up, I love afternoon tea and I am totally broke 🥶😂🤞🏻

cinnabongene · 29/09/2022 13:25

The Ritz really isn’t £45! I’ve paid as much as £70 for an afternoon tea in London.

HoppingPavlova · 29/09/2022 13:29

Someone is REALLY bad at maths. If it is 40 a head and covering the bride means it is 60 a head then it means there are only 2 of you going as well as the bride. Is this the case?

Dixiechickonhols · 29/09/2022 13:30

XelaM · 29/09/2022 13:24

On a side note, does anyone have any recommendations for cheap afternoon tea in London, as my birthday is coming up, I love afternoon tea and I am totally broke 🥶😂🤞🏻

Try groupon. I did Royal horseguards via groupon one Christmas and it was lovely.

Soozikinzii · 29/09/2022 13:33

Although it seems alot for afternoon tea I don't live in London .Also it seems reasonable compared to some of the ridiculously expensive hen party ideas that some have up here - trips abroad stately home stays etc

cinnabongene · 29/09/2022 13:34

cinnabongene · 29/09/2022 13:25

The Ritz really isn’t £45! I’ve paid as much as £70 for an afternoon tea in London.

Sorry that should have been £90

Bookworm20 · 29/09/2022 13:37

Its probably one with prosecco, which tend to be a fair bit more. I'd also balk at paying £40 for sandwiches and a bit of cake, but afternoon teas have always been pretty expensive for what they are.

Around here they are usually about the £15-£25 pound mark. But I have seen some at really nice hotels and places for about £40 so its likely to be correct.

WeAllHaveWings · 29/09/2022 13:39

Never understand why people can't just ask....

"£40 😲 that sounds like it will be a posh treat , I've never been to one over 20 quid before. Where is it and what does it include? Will any additional drinks be extra? xx"

Melonymelony · 29/09/2022 13:43

Nice afternoon tea is expensive! But you won’t need to eat for a few days afterwards so it balances out 😉

InsertPunHere · 29/09/2022 13:51

Like a PP I've been to the Afternoon Tea at Betty's and the food was outstanding. There was plenty to eat and we just had snacks for dinner later. It really was a marvellous meal in beautiful surroundings and well worth the money.

It's horses for courses.

Xmasbaby11 · 29/09/2022 13:56

I think that's a fair price. As pp said, you get what you pay for so you'd hopefully be in a lovely atmosphere with special food. I really enjoy afternoon tea and it is usually far more than you can eat (and I have a big appetite and a sweet tooth), it replaces a meal, and isn't bad value at all. I can see why it's not to everyone's tastes but I love sandwiches, scones and cakes and could eat them all day - so totally in my element with it! Often you have leftovers to take home, as well.

It's fair enough to want to know how the price is split, though - definitely ask about that!