To split accommodation cost by adult not by room

[nwth73]

Going on holiday with a group of friends - have been holidaying together since uni. Some now have families. Make up of the group is:

Family 1 (2 adults, 1 baby)
Family 2 (2 adults, 1 toddler, 1 baby)
Single adult
Couple 1
Couple 2

In the past, we have always split the house cost equally amongst the adults. Couple 1 is a recent match, last year they were a single (in their own room).

House has got 6 bedrooms, 2 are interconnecting with 1 being a very small box room for the toddler of family 2 - it would not fit even a single adult.

I (for my sins as the organiser) have proposed to count the toddler as a half and then split the cost across the group. So Family 1 and each Couple pays £631, Family 2 pays £789 and single pays £316 (total cost for the week is c.£3k).

Couple 1 has come back and said the cost should be split by room since Family 2 is taking 2 rooms. Which would leave Family 1, the single adult and each Couple paying £500 and Family 2 paying £1000.

I don't think this is fair to the single adult in particular, who is paying twice as much as the other adults when in the past we've split it evenly (and couple 1 friend has benefitted from this before they became a couple).

AIBU to split it by person not by room? What is the done thing once children enter the fray and are taking up rooms of their own?

YABU - it should be split by room
YANBU - it should be split by person (and in what ratio of adults/kids?!)

We've gone away with a big group in the past and split by room (unless one room is much worse, eg the box room in your case).

However the tricky thing here is that Couple 1 were happy to split by person when they were single and want to change it now they're part of a couple. That's not fair on the remaining single person.

Maybe a compromise like single person pays 75% of the room amount?

Yes!!!! The person complaining previously benefitted from the system. Annoying.

Your friend's kids should be in the cramped attic room with a baby monitor so she can hear them. You and she should then be trading off on who gets the master each year.

I think what you've done is fair, and even if the child shared with the adults then the tiny room would be unused.

Either split just adults, or count adults as 2, kids in their own bed as 1.

Divide total cost by 19 (I think that’s the sun for your party). Adults pay 2/19 of the cost each and kid is 1/19.

We go away with different sized families so split as above but in your case I’d say just by adults. Definitely not rooms!

*sum

Oh goodness wait until you do the online food shop. I think your way is fine. Otherwise couples pay 100% couple with toddler 150% and singles 75%. Baby in it's parent's room should be charged.

If its a house, then you are all sharing the amenities so by person.

I think your proposed spilt is fair - particularly as the couple were happy enough to benefit from the single price until this year, but now they are a couple want to penalise the remaining singleton.

Also I do agree that toddler bedroom should be accounted for as a half share. The family have the advantage of not having them in the same room and the accommodation presumably costs a bit more than it would have done if you hadn't factored in the box room as well.

I'd go back all wide eyed innocent " Well we've always split it per adult up to now. What has changed?" Maybe next year it's time to change the format or the participants.

Split by room and then give them the one you earmarked for the toddler.

This happened with my group of friends last year. Me and the other single person both dropped out (couldn’t afford the increased cost) and the holiday didn’t go ahead.

Hotel rooms are charged per room because they are businesses trying to maximise profits. I can’t afford to pay double so I don’t stay in hotels unless it is for work.

I would split by beds, regardless of whether the beds are occupied by adults or children.

So a double/ twin room costs twice as much as a single.

Cots are free.

e.g.
An accommodation is £800
It has 2 double rooms, 2 twins and 2 singles - 8 beds altogether, plus cots
Each bed costs £800 / 8 = £100

A single room would only be £100, but a double/ twin room would be £200. A room with 3 beds would be £300 etc. and costs don't count.

*Cots don't count

It all gets a bit complicated once kids are involved because inevitably you need a larger property to accommodate them so the total price goes up. Next time I would opt for a hotel or somewhere with individual holiday cottages that everyone can have their own space and pay for that but you all meet up for lunch /dinner and outings.

It also sometimes isn't that fair with DCs if the numbers don't work out.
We used to holiday with two sets of friends who each had two DC to our one. We split equally by family, but inevitably DS would get the rubbish bedroom with no aircon far away from us, because he tended not to wake up at night. I put my foot down on equal family bill splitting when their DCs started ordering cans of coke and adult meals whilst our one DS had a children's meal with water.

I'm often the single adult and I have a bit of a basic guideline:

• If I get equal shot at the rooms as anyone else (e.g. I am equally considered for a double room with ensuite when they are available) or all the rooms are identical, I'll pay for the room. I don't have to GET the good room, I just have to have an equal shot at it, e.g. drawing lots.
• If I am expected to take the smaller/shitter room (often there might be a single that is not ensuite, for eg) then I'll pay per person

What I won't do is pay per room and then be bundled into the shit room just because I'm single.

But I also agree that Couple 1 were happy when it favoured them and now want the precedent changed to suit their new circumstances.

@nwth73

£3000/ 9 adults is £333 per adult that's how I'd split it

If they can't agree say you'll all go to a nice hotel and everyone pay their own

@LadyFromage yes I agree if you're paying the same for a room, then you should get the same choice.
My single friend paid a huge single supplement for one of our ski trips and got shunted into a postage stamp sized room that never would have fitted two people.

Your approach is fine @nwth73

It's by far the fairest way

Couple 1 are being CF to save themselves £131 (£500 instead as they want Family 2 paying £500 more than they do/£211 more than they would in OPs calculations, and single adult paying £189 more!! )

Nothing in Couple1's suggestion would be fair.
I'd just reply to Couple 1 that I have calculated it in the fairest way.

I’d put the above to Couple 1 as the solution😂…..or actually just use it as an example in my measured, calm & friendly response to say NO.

You could split by room but charge half as much for the box room. Assume the rest are doubles?

@nwth73 I don't think you said which group you fall into ?

I’d also now be wary of Couple 1 - they’ve been happy to take the advantage whilst it suited them and are now becoming dodge in their treatment of others when the balance shifts slightly. And if they cause a fuss to be honest, if I were organising, I’d prob be considering whether they should be invited again…

I wouldn’t be offering to organize this again. It’s just so petty and mean!

If you have always divided between adults happily and the only difference is that this house has a Tiny attached sleeping space for a toddler, split between adults again.
Have an adult discussion another time about what to do in future, given that the number of kids will grow over time.