COVID - What would you do?

[Allelbowsandtoes]

Hi, sorry not quite an AIBU but wasn't really sure where this fit.
DP and I were due to go to Cornwall with a big group of his friends for a long weekend, this weekend. Had paid £250 between us towards massive house we were all renting in a lovely location, were both super excited.
DP started feeling a bit rough on Wednesday but assumed he was just run down as we've both been very busy. Thursday his lungs felt a bit heavy so he did a COVID test on the off chance, which was positive.
Obviously we had to tell his mates and the majority weren't happy for us to come which is understandable as they mostly have young kids and a couple had been quite ill with it before.
I know we did the right thing but we're both gutted to miss out.
I guess my question is what would you do - are people even covid testing anymore? Is this just going to carry on forever? Without restrictions people will be catching COVID so frequently, will we always have to put our lives on hold while we have it?
Fwiw DP is a lot less ill than last time we had it and I'm still testing negative and feel fine.

We're on a journey. Covid is with us for good, the goal of the practices we have got used to were about slowing spread to stop healthcare services getting overwhelmed. They're not.

Hospitals stopped routine testing of patients several weeks ago.

Personally I wouldn't be bothered. But we're not yet at the point where people in the community view Covid the same as any other viral illness or cold.

Sorry about your trip.

Sorry your DH has Covid - we’ve had a similar situation this last week in that I’ve had it and we think DS -15 months too.
I’d felt rough and assumed I was run down - only did a test as my neck started aching which is what happened the last time I had it, and I was due to meet up with a friend.

To answer your question - yes, I avoided the supermarket/ cancelled my weekend plans / didn’t see anyone etc - as knew that I had it. Did a couple of tests a few days later; this time I was negative again 5 days later so carried on as normal then in terms of being out and about/ shopping etc.

I did go outside in the 5 days but only with DS so he could get some air and we weren’t near anyone so noone to pass it onto. I felt that given I knew I had it it was prob the responsible thing to avoid giving it to others. I also felt too ill for the first few days anyway so needed to be at home resting.

The whole Covid thing is pretty tedious though. NHS recommend “isolating” for 5 days now though of course it’s not mandatory.

Forgot to add - DH didn’t get it/ tested and carried on as normal during this time.
hope your DP feels better soon

I'm interested in the neck ache comments as we've all had a heck ache illness one after the other. No cold or anything but it was very strange. I wonder if it was covid

We aren't testing. In your case I therefore wouldn't have tested, but probably wouldn't have gone overnight if I was unwell

But even if it wasn’t Covid, surely you wouldn’t have gone if one of you was unwell - people can catch other viruses, not just Covid. So Covid or something else - stay at home while you feel poorly 🤷🏼‍♀️

@demotedreally yeah the neck ache thing is odd. I’ve had a neck ache after each of the Covid vaccinations (all 3 so far) and have had the same when I’ve been ill with it. As I say, it’s the thing that prompted me to test as I never have that symptom either any other cold/ virus. Tbh I only tested as we have some tests left over from when they were free to receive and my neck was aching. It did seem to come and go a lot quicker this time too which was a bonus!

If I turned up and someone was very obviously ill I would be peeved. I remember SIL turning up obviously very unwell on Christmas Eve, she had to go to bed Christmas Day afternoon. She was driven home by MIL Boxing Day as felt so unwell and wanted her own bed. Of course we then all caught it.

It was a very nasty virus but no one had any long term health issues afterwards, this was years ago. I had covid in the first wave and it took me almost a year to fully recover. Because of my experience I would feel dreadful giving anyone covid so if I thought it was covid I would test.

THIS!

If he's obviously Ill and contagious leave him at home (regardless of shah the illness is)
Would you want to spread norovirus or flu to friends for example ?

Regardless of what the illness is I mean

Surely that wound depend if he still felt unwell on Saturday. Symptoms often last 2-3 days for many bugs. Personally I'm not testing myself or the dc anymore and would go by how I felt on the day.

I'd treat it in the same way as another viral illness that can be bad in some people - I'd cancel plans. The same way I would if I or one of my family had a sickness bug, the flu, chicken pox etc. Its not fair to spread those things. A cold or something else minor, then yes I'd still go but we all know people that have had covid and been quite badly affected or weren't well enough to work for a week or something. When I had it, it felt like just a cold for a week but I then had extreme fatigue for the next 2 weeks and had to cancel plans and struggled to work, it was in no way 'just a cold'

Would you really want to stay in a house with someone else that knowingly had covid, knowing you would most likely catch it?

I probably wouldnt have tested tbh. The whole thing is a money making farce imo.

You have done the right thing OP. I would have cancelled. As previous posters have said, spreading any kind of contagious virus isn't on.

I recently felt Ill when back at school for a week. Tested as multiple kids I teach diagnosed with covid. As a result, I missed a few days work and lost out on a few hundred quid. Was still testing positive on my return to work on days 6 to 9 though.

I personally am not sure whether I would test again this year. It's evident we will catch covid repeatedly especially in high risk environments and without boosters to top up immunity. With mortgage rates increasing inflation etc many / I can't afford to lose out on paid work repeatedly.

It's just a trip and utterly selfish to consider going when unwell. The fact that the illness is covid makes it beyond entitled. Have we learned nothing they past 3 years?!

He wasn't really ill though, at worst it seemed like a mild cold. He's woken up feeling fine today so if it hadn't been COVID we could have travelled down this morning.

What is it that I've done that is "beyond entitled "?
Is it the fact that I encouraged him to test and subsequently we've stayed at home? You're right, I'm a monster 😄
As I stated in my last post, it seemed like a mild cold at worst and he's fine today so we could have driven down this morning.

I don't see this as a Covid issue but a wider conversation about spreading illness.

I wouldn't go away for the weekend or out with friends/family if I was unwell with something I could easily pass on and make other people poorly.

A light cold for one person is much worse for someone else even without an underlying condition.

So to answer your question OP you did the right thing.

When thinking about this in a work situation, I twice caught bugs off a colleague in a previous job. Both times the colleague had come into work when clearly unwell.
Once when they were rushing to vomit! Other people caught it and needed time off.

I caught a nasty flu type bug from a colleague and was off for 3 weeks, really unwell and threatened with absence management action when I returned.

I also caught Covid at work.

We all need to be able to either WFH or be off sick if that's not possible if we are unwell or have a transferable illness even if we feel ok.
Employers need to allow/encourage this and the idiots that drag themselves in, visit people, cough and sneeze in crowded restaurants etc need to be told to stop.

You didn’t do the right thing. You shouldn’t have tested. Most people aren’t anymore.

Don't be ridiculous!

I wouldn't test on the symptoms OP described.

I'd only test if I had medical need or a decision about seeking treatment.

If OP were my mate I wouldn't care he had covid & would say he can still come.
I have been around others who think that's outrageous strategy.

We don't test for possible flu infection with every sniffle, or tell anyone with flu to stay at home, but in theory we should if covid required such vigilence.

I think the issue is some people have different reactions to it so whilst it’s a mild cold for your DP it may present worse symptoms for someone else especially if they had not had it before. If he just had a mild cold you would not be unreasonable going where as if it was more like flu etc. you would obviously be unreasonable going. In terms of testing I don’t think people are testing as much I certainly wouldn’t test each time I had a mild cold unless there was reason to such as knowing I had been in contact with someone that had covid or I was going to see someone vulnerable and had a cold.

You did the right thing,most of my family are testing if they have symptoms. Some are positive at the moment
My oldest DD has run out of tests, didn't have all the jabs,or flu jab,has had Covid several times,last time she couldn't even get upstairs! She has been really ill for weeks each time.Silly cow smokes,knows how I feel about that,and stopping the jabs ...but she's 52, so isn't going to listen to me.

That's not true though is it, people are encouraged to minimize spread of flu and always have been!

As with Covid people are more contagious in the first 5 days and when they have a fever.