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AIBU?

AIBU to have written to the school?

99 replies

imissedabit · 23/09/2022 22:16

I have written to dd's school four times in my life (she is 18) and all within the last few months. Firstly, in relation to her end of year results, then about her career guidance, then about a tragic awful crime and now because they've brought in a new principal. I know that things change and I loved change when I was young but I'm just concerned whether they have any continuity of care?
I feel like they probably think that I was someone who suddenly got access to the internet or something!
If you were a principal, would you just write me off as some sort of deranged lunatic?

OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

221 votes. Final results.

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You are being unreasonable
92%
You are NOT being unreasonable
8%
BeyondApproach · 23/09/2022 23:54

FlissyPaps · 23/09/2022 23:51

😂😂😂

Chill the fuck out. I agree with a PP. You are a lunatic.

I'm usually chilled as fuck but a lot of shit has happened and she's in her final year and I genuinely couldn't tell you the names of her teachers but.... her last exam results were really bad and em I'm just trying to communicate about that and then there was a controversy, followed by an unrelated tragedy and now a newly appointed principal. Don't throw acronyms at me. They annoy the fucking shit out of me!

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Sweetmotherofallthatisholyabov · 23/09/2022 23:54

I now know the difference between comprehensive and comprehensible. I googled it.

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BeyondApproach · 23/09/2022 23:58

Well this was a comprehensive introduction of the new principal using incomprehensible acronyms.

I suspect this poor principal has wondered whether I was dead for the past 5 years.

I guess it's just funny as I have never felt the need to write to the school before this year! In fact, I wonder they knew I existed at all. 😆

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FlissyPaps · 24/09/2022 00:01

BeyondApproach · 23/09/2022 23:54

I'm usually chilled as fuck but a lot of shit has happened and she's in her final year and I genuinely couldn't tell you the names of her teachers but.... her last exam results were really bad and em I'm just trying to communicate about that and then there was a controversy, followed by an unrelated tragedy and now a newly appointed principal. Don't throw acronyms at me. They annoy the fucking shit out of me!

Then politely email or phone the school and ask for a breakdown of which abbreviation means. While you wait, you could do your own research and look them up online which could give you some indications of what they mean.

I’m really not understanding the point of your thread so good luck with whatever it is you’re wanting to do miss “i DoNt GoOgLe”

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BeyondApproach · 24/09/2022 00:01

SuperCamp · 23/09/2022 23:25

Was it the old head that committed the awful tragic crime?

It seems harsh to email about a change of Head if it was.

God no. Nothing like that.

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BeyondApproach · 24/09/2022 00:03

FlissyPaps · 24/09/2022 00:01

Then politely email or phone the school and ask for a breakdown of which abbreviation means. While you wait, you could do your own research and look them up online which could give you some indications of what they mean.

I’m really not understanding the point of your thread so good luck with whatever it is you’re wanting to do miss “i DoNt GoOgLe”

The aim of writing is to communicate. If you use incomprehensible or little know acronyms while writing, then you're not communicating!

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BeyondApproach · 24/09/2022 00:16

I just replied welcoming the new principal, thanking the acting principal for his work recently, saying that new dude sounded like he had impressive qualifications acronyms and just asking that there would be a handover of sorts in relation to dd's history.

AND WHAT THE FUCK DO THE ACRONYMS MEAN????????????????????

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rainbowmilk · 24/09/2022 00:36

If your emails are worded in the same tone as your posts on this thread then yes they probably think you’re mad. If not then no, 4 emails is probably not making them think they need to call the police and have you arrested for harassment. Either way, you really need to calm down.

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BeyondApproach · 24/09/2022 05:19

I think it was probably a copy and paste job from his CV which would have made sense to those working within the education sector but I don't work in that sector, nor do most of the parents of the pupils there, so it was a bit of a 'know your audience'? I'm pretty sure everyone else just googled, but I hate googling as I end up looking at pictures of kittens or reading about cancer drugs or something, and forgetting what I was googling in the first place! 😂
Perhaps I should just google and leave the poor teachers in peace lol.

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BeyondApproach · 24/09/2022 05:37

Testina · 23/09/2022 23:34

“New appointment of new principal:
Once again in response to the email, just asking whether there would be handover to the new principal about my daughter's circumstances.”

Either it’s a teeny tiny school or your daughter has very special circumstances. That would be a form tutor question in my school, head of a year at a push!

It has about 400 students I would say. My daughter has unusual rather than 'special' circumstances and it's a brilliant school with a focus on an all-round education, so they have good pastoral care and really do value their students' welfare.

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BeyondApproach · 24/09/2022 05:43

I was talking to a friend a few weeks ago (a guy I had met online) and he mentioned that he was going to his parent's house for the weekend as it was their anniversary. I was like 'Oh? I didn't know you had parents!' He had just never mentioned them before lol.
I suspect the principal had a similar thought when I sent my first email ever 'Oh? I didn't know JuniorBeyond had a mother!'.

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BeyondApproach · 24/09/2022 05:45

Mind you, presumably the principal isn't quite as thick as I am and assumed that I existed somewhere In a vacuum.

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balalake · 24/09/2022 07:01

You could have replaced at least one of them with this thing called a conversation, talking to the Head or someone else at the school.

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Sargass0 · 24/09/2022 07:10

HMFEB

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crochetmonkey74 · 24/09/2022 07:22

Schools get a lot of emails. They won’t even have noticed
This, and I say this gently- you are not crazy, zany or any of those things. Also lots of your knowledge gaps are easily filled. You say you don't know her teachers names so have you never attended a parents eve or had a progress report? They happen even in 6th form. Also he school/college website will have them or you could ask your DD.
It's good to remember that when we do things are embarrassing, it's the centre of our world but for other people especially large establishments they don't even notice or care. Also as a teacher, I have some parents who email me weekly and some who never have. I think nothing of it. Literally nothing.

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crochetmonkey74 · 24/09/2022 07:24

BeyondApproach · 24/09/2022 05:43

I was talking to a friend a few weeks ago (a guy I had met online) and he mentioned that he was going to his parent's house for the weekend as it was their anniversary. I was like 'Oh? I didn't know you had parents!' He had just never mentioned them before lol.
I suspect the principal had a similar thought when I sent my first email ever 'Oh? I didn't know JuniorBeyond had a mother!'.

As a school or college, they will have known all about your DD from school records and from contact info forms you filled in etc
I'm presuming you have an email registered with the school where they send letters and info to.

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EarringsandLipstick · 24/09/2022 07:31

If you're writing a fucking email to me, at least make it comprehensible?

If you are in Ireland, these are all very standard terms - you honestly didn't know what a 'lecturer in TCD' meant? 🙄

You writing 4 emails to the school isn't odd; the way you're expressing yourself here very much is.

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MichelleScarn · 24/09/2022 07:54

So you've had no contact with the school before? No parents evenings/events/fetes? I would have thought if she has specific unusual life circumstances that are as such that a new principle needs to know about them, you would be in frequent contact?
Are you her primary carer and always been?
Most importantly does dd know about all the emails?

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lannistunut · 24/09/2022 07:56

I have had periods where I wrote a lot and periods where I didn't write at all. What matters is whether each letter you send is reasonable/justified.

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PriamFarrl · 24/09/2022 08:09

So these acronyms that are getting you so wound up are just relating to his qualifications and not to do with your DD at all?

If so, what does it bloody matter?

And believe me, not one member of staff at that school has ever wondered why they don’t hear from you.

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scrufffy · 24/09/2022 08:22

You say her results were bad. Wasn't there a parents evening for you to discuss that with them?

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Sarahcoggles · 24/09/2022 08:36

I'm confused - were the acronyms in an email relating to your daughter? Or were they part of a list of the new head's qualifications?
If it's the former, then I'd need to know what they meant.
If it's the latter, then I wouldn't be interested. I'd assume he/she was qualified for the job, and wouldn't need to know the finer points of the CV.

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Testina · 24/09/2022 08:48

“I think it was probably a copy and paste job from his CV”

🙄 so you left out the bit that explains perfectly why the acronyms.

New staff member intro in email.

  1. some parents know the acronyms
  2. some don’t but can happily read them as “been involved in a lot - good, that’ll do me”
  3. some are interested to know the details - and find them easy to Google
  4. most don’t care - they either trust the school to recruit well, or they’re disengaged from it
  5. One wants ti make a fuss about nothing. More dick than lunatic
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Fairislefandango · 24/09/2022 09:22

I just replied welcoming the new principal, thanking the acting principal for his work recently, saying that new dude sounded like he had impressive qualifications acronyms and just asking that there would be a handover of sorts in relation to dd's history.

That's completely unnecessary. If there area acronyms you don't understand, just either Google them or send a brief email to the general school enquiries/admin email address asking for the meaning of the acronyms.

Can you imagine if every parent sent an email welcoming the new headteacher, commenting on his qualifications and asking about whether whatever was in place for their child(ren) was going to continue under the new leadership?! It's not as if when a new head arrives they wipe all the data from the school's computer systems and erase teachers' memories! Schools do not have time for this. If there's really something wrong, tell them. Otherwise let them get on with their jobs.

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Fairislefandango · 24/09/2022 09:28

I was like 'Oh? I didn't know you had parents!' He had just never mentioned them before lol. I suspect the principal had a similar thought when I sent my first email ever 'Oh? I didn't know JuniorBeyond had a mother!'.

Don't be so ridiculous! Schools have home information about all students. They literally have to. There is absolutely no need to comunicate with school in order to remind them you exist. They knew full well that you existed. Now they know that you are probably 'one of those parents'.

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