To have screamed at my 2 year old

[Wineplease90]

I am usually quite a calm and placid person but my toddler pushed me to my limits today, I took him to the park and spent 2 hours there, fed the ducks etc, however, we had to leave to pick DD up from school and then world war happened. He wouldn’t leave, he was screaming at the top of his voice, I tried so hard, he kept throwing himself into the fence, he has given himself a bruise on the head. Eventually I carried him to the car screaming and I shouted listen that is enough!!! No more screaming! It was so stressful! Everybody was staring at me and I felt like the worst mum ever. I don’t drink usually but I could literally drink 6 bottles of wine and forget who I am (I’m not going to obviously). What have I don’t for my toddler to behave to badly, I feel like such a failure as my eldest is absolutely brilliant. The only difference with their upbringing is that I had him through Covid and managed to exclusively breastfeed him, failed completely with my first. Why is he so hard 😭

Huge sympathies. And, it's not you, it's him :D Seriously, toddlers are soooo unreasonable!

Do you think 2hrs at the park followed by school pick-up might have been a bit much for him? It sounds like there was lots going on at the school and maybe he just got totally overstimulated?

Potentially yes, but an hour of that was trying to persuade him to go 😂

Is there a reason he is only like that for me? He’s a different child with everybody else but a nightmare when I am around. DH tells me to go put sometimes as it is easier for him 😭

Definitely been there. Don't worry about what other people think, who cares, they can be little terrors. My almost 2 year old launched a yoghurt across the aquarium the other day, as I went to retrieve it, he ran to the pram grabbed the change bag and ran through aquarium screaming dragging the bag behind him, then started banging on the fish tank infront of everyone. All because he was mad that I wouldn't let him eat lunch in the middle of the aquarium. We'd only been there for 20 mins, to get to the exit I had to walk through the whole bloody aquarium carrying my son like a surfboard whilst he screamed the place down, with my husband carrying the pram behind. Bloody nightmare.

its really hard isn’t it, like so so hard sometimes! It’s very taboo as well, I talk to my friends a lot and they seem to relate, however, the mums you meet at the park look at me like I have 2 heads when I tell them I’d rather be at work some days 😂😂

I honestly feel so much better, so glad I posted, thank you all, honestly x

I've got a 2yo too and he has been really volatile this past couple of weeks. The tantrums have all been at home thankfully.
We've recently moved and he has started a new nursery so he is all over the place and taking it out on us.
I always try to make sure he has had a good nap and is never hungry and tired + hungry is a recipie for disaster.
Otherwise as everyone else has said, prep them before you've got to leave, and when you do go, give them something to distract them like a toy to hold in the buggy or some food.
Im not sure we can avoid all meltdowns though unfortunately 🥴

I came on period today too so that doesn’t help 😩, but yes you are right, tomorrow is another day, now they are both asleep I just want to tell them how much I love them 😂 so odd.

Gosh, my 3.5 year old can be this bad. He screamed in tantrum at me, older DC and any other random parents and children on the school run on Monday. And then sat down and it took so long for me to persuade him to move. You’ve had it easy OP!

Miraculously I have more patience with him than my older DC who doesn’t tantrum like that but can be such a defiant little 💩it drives me to absolutely scream at him (always regret it after).

I think when everybody is looking at you, it’s adds to the pressure, although I know they are Probably sympathising, I start sweating and get more agitated. My DD is a dream, always has been, I feel guilty that I’m always too busy with DS

They say that kids are worse with the person they feel safest with. They can let out all their emotions and they know you will still love them.
You should follow instagram.com/dr.martha.psychologist She is so good and talks a lot about dealing with kids when they are like this and about how to heal after the shouting! Helps that she has a young child herself so knows from experience as well as her career

The other day my 2 year old made me cry. He refused to nap and as a result was a nightmare. I've never seen him that bad before. Completely hyper, kicking his baby sister, refusing to do a single thing I said. I took him to visit his grandparents, partly because there was a risk I was really going to lose my shit with him. The whole time we were there he was an angel, but the minute we got home he started again. He was like that until bedtime. Poor DH came home to me shouting "he's all yours" and then bursting into tears.

2 year olds are arseholes. DS is 3 soon and I honestly can't wait. Although I've heard of this mystical being the "threenager" so maybe I shouldn't get too excited!

Yes, I keep thinking not long now, but some 3 year olds are difficult aren’t they. I feel so much better after my curry, what a bloody day!

To top it off I bought a bloody kitten who won’t come downstairs because of the dog, I can hear him prancing around upstairs, if he wakes the devil there will be bell to pay 😂😂

I had similar with my 2yr old
Getting in the car he wanted to climb to his seat himself as normal. He gets into the foot well normally then into seat. I strap him in
But this time he jumped to other side of the car. I close door walk round for him to jump back saying no car seat. Me sit in ' sibling' car seat. I say no you're too small this is yours. Ans has a meltdown. Threw a toy at me. By now it was a good 5 min. I had about 7 min in car parking time. Eo i grabbed his leg and hoisted him back and loudly said 'now get in your seat'! He cried for ages. Well screamed a rage because id life him in. Got out car park. Had to find somewhere to pull over and calm him.

Honestly if I saw you today in the park, I would of been thinking poor mum! Toddlers are the hardest! I had to carry mine out of Asda last week because he was throwing himself on the floor and having a tantrum because I wouldn’t buy him toilet cleaner 🤔. We had to go for a 10 mile drive so he would fall asleep and i could concentrate on not losing my shit. I’ve shouted at DS in the past, i always feel guilty but at the end of the day, I know I try my best for him and I’m only human!

Yeh it's tough. Totally second what someone else said about toddlers behaving worse with the person they feel safest with. When my son gets frustrated he will throw things, kick and hit me, pull my hair, tell me to go away. He's a bit more "spirited" (LOL) than my friends kids & only like it with me, lucky me! I follow the parenting advice, doesn't make a difference, hoping he grows out of it. Most people are empathetic but some people can be judgemental, but I don't take any notice. All kids have different personalities and they don't call them the terrible twos for nothing.

I have often wondered this too, people need to mind their own business!

Oh bless you. A rubbish day. Can I recommend a book that has massively helped me survive the toddler stage? "How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen". Fabulous book, totally saved my sanity with simple but really effective strategies.