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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Palace requests mourners to stop leaving stuff like marmalade sandwiches

284 replies

Sparklybutold · 12/09/2022 14:55

So the palace has now told people to stop leaving marmalade sarnies and such...

Those who thought it was ok the first time still think it's ok? Or now the palace acknowledges how ‘unsustainable’ it is change your opinion?

FWIW. It was idiotic the first time and still is.

OP posts:
Guiltycat · 12/09/2022 15:24

Anyone genuinely grieving for someone that they have never met, who survived to a very old age in good health and in whose life every need was met is completely batshit.

Thousands of people died that day. Elderly people alone, scared and worried about money. Children with cancer. Mothers who grafted every day of their life worried about what would happen to their children.

If the Queen is the only stranger someone is ‘grieving’ over then personally I just assume they are an attention seeker who tends to jump on any passing bandwagon and not really think anything through.

Sparklybutold · 12/09/2022 15:24

@LatteCappucino

With Deborah James I think there is an important fundamental difference and that is the fact she was grounded. She lived and came from the real world. The queen and her entourage would have known about this for months/years. They planned for everything else which served there own agenda, such as securing there own wealth but the whole mourning circus? No need as it serves them just well.

OP posts:
Sparklybutold · 12/09/2022 15:25

@Guiltycat

100% yes!!!

It's completely batshit crazy!

OP posts:
tickticksnooze · 12/09/2022 15:28

Sparklybutold · 12/09/2022 15:21

@sevenbyseven @LatteCappucino

They should have done this but they won't because it wouldn't serve them the same. They want the outward show of affection as it supports their agenda. The RF continue to exist owing to peoples complete blind admiration of them.

I don't know. I get the sense that it's more coming from a place of caution about not wanting to provoke the kind of intense public anger that followed Diana's death when they didn't initially engage with these kinds of displays.

I think that's why they've been so careful to make sure they are coming out to look at the flowers etc.

I also suspect the memory of that awful sea of cellophane is why they were very quickly asking people to remove the wrappings.

At least plain unwrapped flowers can be composted and used somehow.

OrlandointheWilderness · 12/09/2022 15:32

Guiltycat · 12/09/2022 15:24

Anyone genuinely grieving for someone that they have never met, who survived to a very old age in good health and in whose life every need was met is completely batshit.

Thousands of people died that day. Elderly people alone, scared and worried about money. Children with cancer. Mothers who grafted every day of their life worried about what would happen to their children.

If the Queen is the only stranger someone is ‘grieving’ over then personally I just assume they are an attention seeker who tends to jump on any passing bandwagon and not really think anything through.

But the Queen was not any old stranger though - she was our monarch, and to some people that means a great deal. She is a public figurehead who has been in our lives for a very long time and the role she held carries great weight for some. I feel no personal need to go and lay flowers, but yes I will grieve her passing and I am still puzzled why people seem incapable of seeing things from another viewpoint.

RequiemForAcat · 12/09/2022 15:36

The Queen was a patron for Dogs Trust. I hate giving to charity though so I’d rather just stick some items in a food bank.

starfishmummy · 12/09/2022 15:38

I wish the palace had had the balls to make a more didactic statement about donating to a charity rather than buying stuff to rot in the street.

Because "people" will do it anyway even if asked not to. (In fact I thought they had suggested charity donations). And what can be done to stop it? Arresting them?

Tort · 12/09/2022 15:40

starfishmummy · 12/09/2022 15:38

I wish the palace had had the balls to make a more didactic statement about donating to a charity rather than buying stuff to rot in the street.

Because "people" will do it anyway even if asked not to. (In fact I thought they had suggested charity donations). And what can be done to stop it? Arresting them?

Nothing can be done if people a determined obviously- they could have asked people not to though. I would imagine it would have at least reduced the pile of rubbish a bit.

ShhDoNotTell · 12/09/2022 15:40

I think it’s ridiculous that people don’t seem to understand basic human emotions like grief, change etc. The unsettling feeling of something they assumed was part of their landscape is perfectly natural in the circumstances. It’s normal to wish to try and ground oneself.

YourLipsMyLipsApocalypse · 12/09/2022 15:41

People are fucking batshit. Marmalade?

I would come back and haunt the fuck out of anyone who tried to commemorate my seven decades of work with a jar of bloody marmalade.

Tort · 12/09/2022 15:41

starfishmummy · 12/09/2022 15:38

I wish the palace had had the balls to make a more didactic statement about donating to a charity rather than buying stuff to rot in the street.

Because "people" will do it anyway even if asked not to. (In fact I thought they had suggested charity donations). And what can be done to stop it? Arresting them?

Why is people in inverted commas?

sunglassesonthetable · 12/09/2022 15:42

*So the palace has now told people to stop leaving marmalade sarnies and such...

Those who thought it was ok the first time still think it's ok? Or now the palace acknowledges how ‘unsustainable’ it is change your opinion?

FWIW. It was idiotic the first time and still is.*

I thought it was sweet and poignant. But I'm glad they nipped it in the bud now.

The Flowers from Diana's death were mulched and used on Kensington Gardens. @tickticksnooze

If the Queen is the only stranger someone is ‘grieving’ over then personally I just assume they are an attention seeker who tends to jump on any passing bandwagon and not really think anything through.

Oh look people different to you.

bellabasset · 12/09/2022 15:43

There were members of the public in Green Park taking the wrapping paper off the flowers this morning. I think it's wasteful, perhaps instead of £50 on flowers you could put the money in a charity to support children and lay one rose with your tribute.

As for all those teddies I see our local charity champion at Tesco asking for donations for the women's Refuge at Christmas and think of all the uses that money could have gone to.

Flopisfatteningbingforchristmas · 12/09/2022 15:44

JudgeJ · 12/09/2022 15:01

I wish that they had asked people leaving flowers to remove all wrappings, etc., we were up at Sandringham today and a Tesco (etc) plastic wrapping does rather detract.

They have and are providing bins for the wrapping.

MassiveSalad22 · 12/09/2022 15:44

Pleeeease can someone confirm the queen didn’t even like marmalade??? 😄 it’s all just bloody performative nonsense. I LOVE the queen but honestly people are just doing shit for show.

Sparklybutold · 12/09/2022 15:45

@YourLipsMyLipsApocalypse

😂😂😂

OP posts:
readingatdawn · 12/09/2022 15:48

Aubriella · 12/09/2022 15:08

I was there yesterday, someone left a sandwich , but this time with a jar of Bonne Maman Bitter Orange marmalade.

Fucking cringe

pigsDOfly · 12/09/2022 15:50

Penguinfeather781 · 12/09/2022 15:07

The first person to do it was no doubt quite witty and poignant. Trouble is the number of people copying. Ditto balloons, kids drawings, photos etc. It’s just litter.

I can’t help thinking it would be far better to light a candle at home, make a charitable donation or just think something inside your head quietly yourself.

I can't help thinking it would be far better to light a candle at home, make a charitable donation or just think something inside your head quietly yourself.

No that wouldn't be any good. They want to be seen doing whatever it is they're doing, otherwise no one else will know they've done it.

Clarice99 · 12/09/2022 15:51

Guiltycat · 12/09/2022 15:24

Anyone genuinely grieving for someone that they have never met, who survived to a very old age in good health and in whose life every need was met is completely batshit.

Thousands of people died that day. Elderly people alone, scared and worried about money. Children with cancer. Mothers who grafted every day of their life worried about what would happen to their children.

If the Queen is the only stranger someone is ‘grieving’ over then personally I just assume they are an attention seeker who tends to jump on any passing bandwagon and not really think anything through.

In full agreement @Guiltycat

I'm astonished at the wastefulness of it all. It makes me angry too as some people are literally starving, and the other side of the coin is obscene wastefulness to publicly show 'you care'. 🙄🙄🙄

IamtheDevilsAvocado · 12/09/2022 15:53

bellabasset · 12/09/2022 15:43

There were members of the public in Green Park taking the wrapping paper off the flowers this morning. I think it's wasteful, perhaps instead of £50 on flowers you could put the money in a charity to support children and lay one rose with your tribute.

As for all those teddies I see our local charity champion at Tesco asking for donations for the women's Refuge at Christmas and think of all the uses that money could have gone to.

What's wrong with Palace saying (they won't...). Single (picked) flowers only and please donations to x, y & z...

Much less wasteful... Some of those bouquets must have cost over 50£....all of those totalled would mean a HUGE contribution to charities.

JesusMaryAndJosephAndTheWeeDon · 12/09/2022 15:54

WTF are they laying a baited trap for poor Paddington?

Urgh the whole thing is sick due to the amount of waste and such a missed opportunity. The palace could easily have asked people to consider alternatives.

Ideas such as putting out containers for food bank donations, setting up a charitable trust for donations, asking people to plant a tree/shrub/flowers, asking them to light a candle in their window or display a symbol.

We really need to encourage people away from floral tributes, balloons and toys for grief and towards less damaging alternatives.

Blossomtoes · 12/09/2022 15:58

Today I took a bunch of unwrapped pink roses to our war memorial which is our local flower laying place. Because I wanted to. I also have a monthly direct debit for the foodbank. I’ll spend my own money as I choose, thank you.

ShandaLear · 12/09/2022 16:00

Just think how much good could be done in the queen’s name if everyone who wanted put £10 in a charity box instead of tying a bunch of supermarket flowers to a set of railings, but of course that could be done quietly and discreetly and wouldn’t fulfil the desire for all this virtue signalling and performative sorrow. Apparently it took Dan Wooton 4 attempts before he was satisfied with his sad face and flowers video at the palace 🙄

RaRaRaspoutine · 12/09/2022 16:01

The Bonne Maman Bitter Orange marmalade is so specific that it's given me hysterics. Did the person internally debate whether HM only went for the good stuff or didn't mind eating Asda's own?

StillWeRise · 12/09/2022 16:02

No that wouldn't be any good. They want to be seen doing whatever it is they're doing, otherwise no one else will know they've done it.
**
this is it, isn't it- see also 'wanting to be part of history'
But I agree, that it's also a finely judged PR exercise by the palace- look how much the public love the RF, (not saying some don't) and look how much we appreciate their love (that we'll come out and look at this wasteful mountain of
tat.

My tolerance for all of this is waning by the hour, and I'm someone who has had words with overly crude republicans.