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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

CF offering to buy MIL house

84 replies

Glitterlikeawinner · 04/09/2022 15:34

I'm absolutely fuming about a CF behaviour today, but AIBU?

We had the sad day of starting to clear MIL house (mobile home) as she has gone into long term care for dementia. A thoroughly sad situation through and through, today we went through clothes, found old school reports of my husbands etc. Very emotional for both of us.

Anyway, while we were there, there was a knock at the door and this CF didn't even introduce himself but just said, are you selling this place. He goes on to say he's spoken to park owner to enquire about the property as I think he's bought others on park and done them up to resell. I'm stood in the bedroom thinking what a CF, but my DH trying to be pleasant although oversharing completely tells him about his mum and financial situation in the need to sell property. CF continues to talk about he'd basically keep the roof and tear everything else down...my DH family home which his dad built and although old is in a reasonable state of repair. He then proceeds to come in and say how dated the place is. Bloody rude!

I input we're not in any rush to sell and will get a valuation to which he says, you'll only get a few thousand for this. I comment the property opposite, considerably smaller, recently sold for over £100k to which he replies that was newer and you won't get that for this place. My blood was boiling! DH sees him out and the guy says to keep in touch as he's interested. I think there's more chance of pigs flying than us getting in touch with him!!

AIBU? Husband wasn't massively bothered but I was fuming, who does that!!!

OP posts:
Swimmingpoolsally · 04/09/2022 21:57

Herejustforthisone · 04/09/2022 21:12

Is it just the caravan or is it the piece of land it is on too?

Generally with a park home you don’t own th4 land it’s owned by the park owner, you just own the actual home.

Kite22 · 04/09/2022 22:27

DelurkingLawyer · 04/09/2022 21:34

I never cease to be amazed how CF people are after a death.

My FIL died a few months ago. He’d been widowed a few years ago and had a female friend, not quite a GF, that he used to take out for dinner. She rang to see how he was and DH said he’d died a few days ago. In the same 10 minute conversation she asked what DH planned to do with FIL’s car.

DH was too shocked to say anything much and made non-committal noises. He rang her a week later and told her the date of the funeral. She said she’d come and managed to work into the conversation that DH was not to worry about the car because her old one had broken down terminally and she had had to buy one urgently!!

She didn’t turn up at the funeral. Didn’t send a condolence card, or flowers, or call DH and say she had Covid and couldn’t come or whatever. She had probably been FIL’s closest friend who wasn’t a relative. I thought it was shameful that she couldn’t be arsed to turn up for his sake, even though she was pissed off about the car.

Clearly very strange that she didn't come to the funeral.

Also, the phone call when you are passing on the news about the death isn't the time

But once again, knowing someone who might be interested in buying the car would have been really helpful when dealing with all the stuff that needs to be done after a death. I hate selling cars - all that messing about, worrying about meeting people who might want to buy it. Most people would be quite chuffed to know there was someone who was interested.

This thread shows there isn't really a good time to mention these things. Everyone thinks differently, but I would much rather sell the car to someone who offered than have it sitting there for weeks or months as another job on my list of things I need to do.

VictoriaConcordiaCrescit · 04/09/2022 22:45

I initially thought CF stood for cunt face until somebody told me it was cheeky fucker

However, in this case it's cunt face

Do not ever sell to him, he sounds like an arrogant, jumped up little prick with ££ signs in his eyes

DelurkingLawyer · 04/09/2022 23:05

Kite22 · 04/09/2022 22:27

Clearly very strange that she didn't come to the funeral.

Also, the phone call when you are passing on the news about the death isn't the time

But once again, knowing someone who might be interested in buying the car would have been really helpful when dealing with all the stuff that needs to be done after a death. I hate selling cars - all that messing about, worrying about meeting people who might want to buy it. Most people would be quite chuffed to know there was someone who was interested.

This thread shows there isn't really a good time to mention these things. Everyone thinks differently, but I would much rather sell the car to someone who offered than have it sitting there for weeks or months as another job on my list of things I need to do.

Show quote history

I don’t think it’s right that there is no good time to mention these things. It’s terrible timing that turns it into a CF request. Waiting a decent interval after the funeral and saying “if you are looking to sell his car I’d be interested” is fine IMO. It being the first thing that pops into your head to mention when you are told he has died is not fine.

It’s classic CF that they can’t bear the thought that someone else might get in before them, or god forbid that the bereaved family might sell the thing they want on the open market for the best price.

And I should have made clearer in my previous post that the CF after my father in law’s death didn’t want to buy the car to save us having to sell it. She wanted to “take it off our hands” for free! It was worth about 2 grand.

ThePumpkinPatch · 06/09/2022 06:42

mam0918 · 04/09/2022 18:02

I know someone who had a stroke and was rushed to hospital, they survived and when they got out found their house had been cleared and put up for sale by their son who didnt even bother to go to the hospital or check if their mother was ok.

He was told on the phone when she was taken to hospital that it was touch and go and they should prepare to say goodbye and instead of going to sit with her and the rest of the family they went straight to selling the house before she was even dead, she recovered and lived another 5 years after that.

Some people are just selfish and can only think of whats in anything for them.

😲😲😲😲😲😲😲😲😲😲😲 I am stunned. Did the sharpest intake of breath I've ever done. Wow! What the fuck?! What did he say? Did she get her stuff back?

ThePumpkinPatch · 06/09/2022 06:46

Deguster · 04/09/2022 18:15

We had this when my dgdad died - neighbour sobbed, blew his nose, then calmly said that dgdad would have wanted him to have his new Karcher. Shameless fuckers.

Please tell me you told him to get lost?

ThePumpkinPatch · 06/09/2022 06:47

GhostFromTheOtherSide · 04/09/2022 18:21

Most mobile homes only have a lifespan of around 30 years so you’ll be lucky to be able to sell it at all. And if you can it will need a hell of a lot of work doing.

IMO you just can’t get sentimental about a house. It’s a house you don’t want it any more, so giving instructions not to sell it to x or y is just cutting off your nose to spite your face.

And absolutely I would sell privately to avoid estate agents fees at this point.

How do you know how much work it needs doing?!?!

rwalker · 06/09/2022 07:40

Insensitive but on saying that something similar happened to my friends mum when clearing his grandparents house
whilst upset his mum was relieved as they bought it no hassle estate agents very quick and easy and let them move on with things

vix3rd · 06/09/2022 16:20

My dad's neighbour died recently and her daughter told my dad that before they'd even had the funeral, folk were phoning and asking if they were selling her mother's house and they'd be interested.
How totally insensitive ! I think if that had happened when my mother died I may have set fire to them.

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