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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that you're really lucky if you enjoy exercise?!

194 replies

bumblebee1987 · 03/09/2022 22:06

I will preface this by saying that I'm really fed up because I've been dieting and exercising since March and lost a very minimal amount of weight despite really trying, and have now plateaued for weeks, so this is probably more of a vent 😆

I hate exercise. I always have, every since school, I am rubbish at it, am not remotely competitive, and I just don't enjoy it. I have tried many many different types of exercise, it's all the same, I don't enjoy any of it. I don't enjoy watching sport, hearing about sport or being involved in sport in any way.

I go to the gym 3 times a week because I feel like I have to, because I am overweight and I need to sort myself out, but I hate it. I know I need to do it, but I don't enjoy it, and I think this is really unfortunate. My DH on the other hand, LOVES sport, his entire career is based in sport, he loves nothing more than going for a 5 hour bike ride or spending an hour or two in the gym, it's his happy place. Which is great because obviously it's really good for him!

I keep seeing fitness influencers saying how important it is that you find the sport that you love so that you will keep it up, but I really don't think there is one for me?! So I think I am basically stuck with forcing myself to do something I hate a few times a week, despite hating every second of it.

So am I being unreasonable to suggest that it's actually really lucky if you enjoy sport and exercise?! I am not talking about being good at it, I appreciate that being good at it takes a huge amount of dedication and not luck etc, but if you really enjoy it regardless of whether you're good at it or not, then that's really fortunate, right?!

I appreciate that this is very much a first world problem and is meant in a light-hearted way!

OP posts:
Original poster
bumblebee1987 · 03/09/2022 22:35

WhizzFizz · 03/09/2022 22:30

I have hated exercise all my life. Tried everything and found nothing I like.
I've never had any kind of weight problem so no incentive there.
Now in my 60s and have osteoporosis. If I could tell my younger self one thing it would be this. Exercise is not just about weight. It builds your bones. Impact exercise is vital, do it even if you hate it.

Oh gosh, I'm sorry, that sounds so tough. You're so right, it has to be done, but I just wish so much that I was the sort of person who enjoyed it!

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tinselvestsparklepants · 03/09/2022 22:35

Are you me? Seriously, I'd rather sit and read.

I do a lot of walking (dog), usually 3 miles a day, never shift any weight. Envious of "oooh look at that lovely hill I could cycle up that" DH. You're not weird!

DarkDarkNight · 03/09/2022 22:36

Yes, I agree. Several times I’ve gone from being very unfit to struggling through and getting fit - once at the gym, the other times using home DVDs/HIIT workouts. It was hideous, but even when I could exercise at a reasonable intensity without feeling like I was dying I still hate it. I never get that rush, those endorphins that other people talk about. I never want to do it - I mean I do in that I know it gets me looking more toned and I like that, but I have never looked forward to it, or missed it if I couldn’t do it.

EmptyGlassHalf · 03/09/2022 22:36

I wouldn’t say I enjoy exercise as such but I see a trainer twice a week and enjoy the sessions. They’re tough but I like the satisfaction at the end of the hour and the sense of achievement.

The trainer also looked at my diet - 80% of weight loss is down to the food you eat. He made some tweaks and I’ve lost four stone since July last year.

Original poster
bumblebee1987 · 03/09/2022 22:40

Sparklythings1 · 03/09/2022 22:23

I personally find at the gym, unless you’re going to classes, the seconds tick by so slowly and I just want to leave. I shout in my head ‘I AM DOING EXERCISE, THIS IS WHAT I SHOULD BE DOING’!

I don’t know whether I’d say I enjoy running but I do enjoy moments of it. I do love the parkrun, mainly the last few seconds before you cross the finish line! It’s impossible not to be competitive with your own time from the previous week. I would say I have become quite ‘good’ at it, not amazing or top 10 people there but I can sometimes get top 3 female if I really go for it. Those small wins are what keep me going! I’m training for a marathon and don’t enjoy the training at all but it’s like I have no choice but to do it. If I don’t do it I know I’m signing myself up for a very uncomfortable day trying to make my way round a marathon with no training and that’s usually enough to make me go. People love to dramatise it when they hear how far ive ran in training runs saying oh I couldn’t run the length of myself, I could run 5k etc. Well, have you tried? Were you out today trying to run 5k and didn’t manage it? The point I’m making is I’m only getting better at it because I’m doing it. I’ve lost 4 stone in the last year and wore a dress to my friend’s birthday recently and had people saying ‘oh you’re so lucky to be able to wear that’ ‘I couldn’t get away with that’ and I kind of think, well for the last year I’ve been out plodding away in the rain or cold to lose 4 stone while you haven’t bothered to do anything 🙈 Sounds harsh but I think people can be too quick to say how ‘lucky’ people are to be good at something or slim or whatever, when they haven’t actually tried at all. This isn’t any kind of dig at you btw, just off on a tangent 😂

Oh gosh no don't get me wrong, I am not saying that people are all lucky to be good at sports or lucky for being slim (although I do think that some people are naturally slim, my SIL eats rubbish, does no exercise and she's TINY!), I'm solely saying that you're lucky if you enjoy it and it doesn't feel like a chore, if that makes sense? I totally appreciate that some people work really hard to develop skills and train really hard etc, and that's not luck!

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Original poster
bumblebee1987 · 03/09/2022 22:41

tinselvestsparklepants · 03/09/2022 22:35

Are you me? Seriously, I'd rather sit and read.

I do a lot of walking (dog), usually 3 miles a day, never shift any weight. Envious of "oooh look at that lovely hill I could cycle up that" DH. You're not weird!

Haha, sounds like we'd be good friends!

I genuinely put on almost 2 stone since my dog has got too old to go for nice walks any more!

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reesewithoutaspoon · 03/09/2022 22:41

If you like walking what about a walking group. Check facebook for walking groups in your area, You don't have to be an extrovert. just stick your earbuds in and listen to a podcast or something.

StamppotAndGravy · 03/09/2022 22:42

It took at least a year for me to stop actively hating all of running. I actually enjoy it now about 30% of the time which seems like a win. Running club helps a bit because I'm shamed into finishing and I can chat to distract myself but I still don't much like the running. I do like the sleep after, that I'm losing weight, that I can tell colleagues I run and that I can do other things (even like walking round the shops all day) without feeling shattered.

Does anyone actually like the sweaty panty painful bit of exercise? It's the satisfaction, competition and adrenaline that people like

Original poster
bumblebee1987 · 03/09/2022 22:43

I think I need to get someone to look at my diet, because I generally eat really low calorie and I feel like alongside exercise, that should be working and it's not! I think a lifetime of yo-yoing has probably messed up my metabolism to be honest!

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WingBingo · 03/09/2022 22:44

the hardest part of exercise is starting. The best part is the feeling when you finish!

SmileyClare · 03/09/2022 22:50

Your mindset seems wrong. The only reason you’re exercising is to lose weight, you’re punishing yourself and then feeling frustrated when you don’t see results on the scales.

You could be exercising because you like feeling your body moving, your heart pumping, seeing a beautiful view, enjoying being outside, appreciating what your body can do, even enjoying getting home and feeling good that you’ve done something.

Imagine you broke both your legs and couldn’t move around. You’d be desperate to have the strength and freedom to get out and move your body.

I hope that doesn’t sound too preachy! It sounds like you’re being incredibly hard on yourself x

ElspethTascioni · 03/09/2022 22:52

I think @Sparklythings1 post is making a really important point @bumblebee1987 - lots of the people you think are just lucky to enjoy sport, don’t actually naturally enjoy it all, they’re just plugging away it because they know they need to / like the benefits it brings.

I made excuses for myself about why I couldn’t exercise for years, mostly rooted in the fact I was shit at sport at school (I have dyspraxia). But I hit 35, and I was unfit and the weight was creeping up and I just suddenly decided I had to do something about it. I made a split second decision to do C25k, and somehow persevered to 5k, then 10k. But even after a YEAR of running, I didn’t ever really enjoy it - except for when I stopped running at the end! 🤣 But I joined a running club (women only) and now I do enjoy it. Don’t get me wrong, it’s hard, I don’t love being sweaty and the pain in my legs, but I do love the sense of achievement crossing the line after a half marathon - and it’s made all the better BECAUSE it doesn’t come naturally and I’ve had to fight for it. I also like the fact o look good in my clothes and can basically eat what I want because I burn so much running!

junebirthdaygirl · 03/09/2022 22:55

WingBingo · 03/09/2022 22:44

the hardest part of exercise is starting. The best part is the feeling when you finish!

This..every time. I have to fight all the excuses that come into my head not to go to the gym..not to walk ..not to do anything. Then l go and the feeling after is great. It makes me feel young and l am in my 60s. So don't try to enjoy it just do it. And getting into a habit is good. Every day during lockdown l walked at the same time . Before long l found myself getting up and heading out the door without even thinking about it. Unfortunately l have broken that habit now and need to set it up again.

ScruffGin · 03/09/2022 22:56

I hate all exercise as well... Only thing I've ever enjoyed is weights, well I say enjoyed, more didn't absolutely hate! You can see improvement quickly, and it's not as repetitive as cardio. I used to do p90x3 (30 mins at a time, at home), however I've not done it in months, so what do I know 😂
Try weights, maybe a personal trainer?

Original poster
bumblebee1987 · 03/09/2022 22:57

SmileyClare · 03/09/2022 22:50

Your mindset seems wrong. The only reason you’re exercising is to lose weight, you’re punishing yourself and then feeling frustrated when you don’t see results on the scales.

You could be exercising because you like feeling your body moving, your heart pumping, seeing a beautiful view, enjoying being outside, appreciating what your body can do, even enjoying getting home and feeling good that you’ve done something.

Imagine you broke both your legs and couldn’t move around. You’d be desperate to have the strength and freedom to get out and move your body.

I hope that doesn’t sound too preachy! It sounds like you’re being incredibly hard on yourself x

You're totally right, losing weight is the only motivator I have for exercising. If I was naturally slim, I wouldn't go near a gym if you paid me 🤣 I know this is totally the wrong mindset, but my hatred for exercise runs deep, so I don't know how to change how I feel about it?! I hear all of the reasons you have given, but none of them are enough of a draw for me. I know this is a me problem though!

OP posts:
Original poster
bumblebee1987 · 03/09/2022 22:59

ElspethTascioni · 03/09/2022 22:52

I think @Sparklythings1 post is making a really important point @bumblebee1987 - lots of the people you think are just lucky to enjoy sport, don’t actually naturally enjoy it all, they’re just plugging away it because they know they need to / like the benefits it brings.

I made excuses for myself about why I couldn’t exercise for years, mostly rooted in the fact I was shit at sport at school (I have dyspraxia). But I hit 35, and I was unfit and the weight was creeping up and I just suddenly decided I had to do something about it. I made a split second decision to do C25k, and somehow persevered to 5k, then 10k. But even after a YEAR of running, I didn’t ever really enjoy it - except for when I stopped running at the end! 🤣 But I joined a running club (women only) and now I do enjoy it. Don’t get me wrong, it’s hard, I don’t love being sweaty and the pain in my legs, but I do love the sense of achievement crossing the line after a half marathon - and it’s made all the better BECAUSE it doesn’t come naturally and I’ve had to fight for it. I also like the fact o look good in my clothes and can basically eat what I want because I burn so much running!

I hear you, but there are people who do love it, regardless of how good they are. My DH isn't amazing at it, he's distinctly average, but he loves doing it regardless. I want this for myself!

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newbiename · 03/09/2022 22:59

I am exactly the same, except I don't go to the gym. I hate exercise and have never found anything I've liked and I have tried a lot.

ACatCalledPuss · 03/09/2022 23:01

I think sometimes it just takes time. I started running 3 times a week when I was 40 as, while I have always been slim, I worried about the fact that I never really exercised and I wanted to make sure I was as healthy as possible. I can honestly say it took me about 2 years before I really started to enjoy it. Now I hate to miss a run

puddingandsun · 03/09/2022 23:01

I hated PE as a child - think tears and reluctance to go to school on PE day.

I was never sporty.

But a few years ago I joined the gym and after a few months I really started liking it. I do believe now that in time with consistently every one grows to like it - your body just really loves it.

Hopefully, you're nearly there after exercising for all these months.

Anyway, I haven't been exercising after dc so definitely hard to start again and to invest the time it needs before it gets fun. Confused

KatnissNeverdone · 03/09/2022 23:02

I started running about a year ago. I still fucking hate every second of it. I spend the whole run fighting my own brain that's telling me to stop. I've never got that endorphin rush during exercise. I do however LOVE how I feel afterwards. Really proud that I made myself go and got through the hell that it was and also quite like the achey muscles.

I make sure that I'm always signed up to races as I need the motivation to keep me training. And I love a medal.

bitachey · 03/09/2022 23:02

I don’t enjoy it at the time (and detested it at school) but feel amazing afterwards so I make myself do it. Maybe change what you’re doing? For me exercising outdoors has been a revelation. Also a bootcamp type set up with a community. Makes all the difference. It’s been life changing for me.

Original poster
bumblebee1987 · 03/09/2022 23:02

ACatCalledPuss · 03/09/2022 23:01

I think sometimes it just takes time. I started running 3 times a week when I was 40 as, while I have always been slim, I worried about the fact that I never really exercised and I wanted to make sure I was as healthy as possible. I can honestly say it took me about 2 years before I really started to enjoy it. Now I hate to miss a run

Two years?! That is such a long time 😭 I don't have the attention span for that 🤣 Why does it have to be so hard?!

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Flutterbybudget · 03/09/2022 23:03

I’m similar tbh. I hate “exercising”. I don’t even enjoy walking

the only sports that I DID kind of enjoy, were trampolining and deep water aqua aerobics. And Callanetics (at home).

and playing darts, but I didn’t lose any weight doing that, because you have to have a pint in your hand 🤷‍♀️😂

ElspethTascioni · 03/09/2022 23:04

The point is that you can have enjoyment of exercise @bumblebee1987 you might just need to work for it.

Original poster
bumblebee1987 · 03/09/2022 23:04

Flutterbybudget · 03/09/2022 23:03

I’m similar tbh. I hate “exercising”. I don’t even enjoy walking

the only sports that I DID kind of enjoy, were trampolining and deep water aqua aerobics. And Callanetics (at home).

and playing darts, but I didn’t lose any weight doing that, because you have to have a pint in your hand 🤷‍♀️😂

🤣🤣🤣 I think I could get on board with darts!!!

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