Colleague taking the piss….

[Laughingteacakes]

I work in a team alongside a colleague, we do the same job, we are on a small team in a public services workplace - don’t want to be too outing. We are able to work from home but also have an office base and we do work in the community, around the area of our office base.
This colleague has small children, she doesn’t have childcare in place consistently, she seems to be working her job around her childcare needs rather than pay for the right amount of childcare (money isn’t an issue, think expensive car, large house etc). She also travels from home to work in her work time so that she can be at home at the times she needs for her childcare, without making up the 1.5ish hours this takes her each day. The rest of the team are working really hard, extra hours, lots of stress about getting through the workload, she is breezing along with a much lighter workload and therefore managing to continue to be at home whenever she needs to for her children. It is driving me crazy, I am so pissed off that the rest of the team including myself are working so hard and she is taking the absolute piss. I know different people have different work ethics but I feel this is really out of order. It’s also causing lots of negativity in the team with people feeling so cross.
This has been going on about a year, but is getting worse. I need advice, how would you deal with this, our manager doesn’t seem to be interested as the teams work is getting done.
YABU - you should just get on with it and not get involved.
YANBU - this is a piss take and you should do something to try and get the workload more even. Thanks for any views…I’m that worked up about it I can’t think straight….😊

Has it occurred to any posters who think this ok, that OP cannot just not take on any of her workload bcos it’s possible the “workload” are humans who require treating & not a project or documents or other.

It’s easy to say don’t take in hers but the workload may be literally be patients, who I didn’t realise you can just ignore & say oh my colleague is meant to be dealing with them so I’ll leave them sitting there - even though she’s not even here & I’m now free.

Did you say you were public sector? If so flexi time is usually offered with core hours - lots of working parents use flexi time
to enable the school run/drop
off/pick up.

As for children in the background - what the actual issue? Even at senior meetings it is not unusual to see children at some point - this is one of the changes that the pandemic brought and I think you are a little mean spirited to raise.

You are directing your annoyance at the wrong people - when childcare becomes more affordable I think there will be greater use. Until then parents have successfully proved throughout the pandemic that they are able juggle work and families.

finally one thing to note - maybe your colleague is working outside of the hours you do - not uncommon for working parents and their online diary is not necessarily representative of their workload.

Sorry OP but your post has made me feel sympathy for your work colleague.

It's just wrong! I feel for you abd your colleagues, but you know managers know what's happening.

I heard from a colleague who I think is under performing (not my team but we have work that abuts) that he actually works just 50% of the time cos he took this job losing 50% of his salary. He took the job cos he didn't want to be away from home overseas as much as his old job needed and it was stressful! Also heard in a diff dept a contractor was taken on for 6 months. She delivered zero work in any placement.

Where is management?!

You asked ‘if her manager does not have issue why do you?’ - I have explained why I have issue, several times. Fair play re giving the reasons for her not working her hours, if you feel me giving the full story around what she is unable to work her hours makes me look bad I’ll take that on board.

Until then parents have successfully proved throughout the pandemic that they are able juggle work and families.

Except, of course, they didn't and in many cases it was at the cost of other people's health and well-being -but at that time employers and e players without young children to home school made allowances.

We're not in a pandemic now. Childcare and schools are open and so should be used.

During the pandemic the people who didn't have young people in my team at the time and I were working at least 15 hours a day. We took it in turns being home and being on site. The parents in that team worked a 7.5 hour day exclusively from home to help them manage homeschooling/childcare and work. They also had less work to deliver.

18 months of 15 hour days -often 7 days a week, all leave cancelled. Constant demands and pressure to deliver takes its toll.

So now the rest of us are burnt out and needing flexibility too. That's what I've tried to do in my new job and it's working for now. But people taking the piss - parent or not. Not delivering their workload (we're a strategic team not frontline but responsible for delivering services to a large region) will result in the, having that flexibility taken away.

I'd say it's down to poor management. Chances are your manager knows what is going on but it's easier to turn a blind eye then address it, especially if the work is getting done anyway.

THANK YOU (again).

I racked up 650 hours of unpaid overtime during the pandemic as I was covering parents in this way - over 17 weeks of unpaid work. The problem now is that parents have returned to work but feel they’re “owed” having their kids at home/working under their hours because it “worked” during the pandemic. It didn’t - it came at the cost of doubling everyone else’s workload.

I’m now on mandatory reduced hours because I burned out. And yes, all of this is bad management, but it’s also entitlement, and seeing “well it worked during the pandemic” is really starting to wear thin.

The mental health impact of the pandemic is a lot more nuanced than parents having colleagues pick up their work…

The mental health impact of the pandemic is a lot more nuanced than parents having colleagues pick up their work…

I am quite aware of that, as someone who worked on the pandemic response from day 1 (before the govt) and someone who continues to work on the effects of the pandemic.

If you want to start a thread about the MH impact of the pandemic then I'll willingly share my experiences. However, this thread is about people taking the piss at work and one outcome of the pandemic is that people who don't have young children at home worked really fucking hard to cover for their colleagues and are now feeling the effects of that.

@rainbowmilk I'm glad you have now got a more sensible working life, but I'm sorry that it came at the expense of your health. I hope that it does stimulate a change in the attitude of your employer

Could not agree more. Op has confirmed she is in an NHS role and it really isn't as simple as just doing your hours. And suggesting that women who don't want/cannot have children should support those that do is at best misguided and at worst just plain offensive.

Thank you @thesurrealist. I’m glad your new job is working out better for you too.

If public service, then paid for by tax payers!,! I’m sure most tax payers would agree that there are plenty of things tax can be spent on other than some employees taking the piss! Claiming for work hours that you have not actually worked is fraud

one outcome of the pandemic is that people who don't have young children at home worked really fucking hard to cover for their colleagues and are now feeling the effects of that

This seems like a huge generalisation.

unless this situation impacts your workload in some way and that you need to pick up the slack for her, I would say keep out of it. If there is a problem with her work and work ethos, I am sure your line manager will recognise this and take the necessary steps to sort things. In the meantime, don't pick up any slack for her and focus on your own workload. Don't cover for her and if she really is as lazy as you say, she will be outed. The fact she is being allowed to use her hours for travel is ridiculous. But there is nothing you can do and you will only hurt yourself if you get involved with this believe me.

As is the generalisation that all working parents work harder than anyone else...and yet, that's allowed to stand.

Honestly thought this was a post about me. Except I don't have fancy cars, I'm not wealthy by any means - quite the opposite and I'm willing to take on more but my control freak line manager doesn't hand me stuff and she works till late purely out of choice and because she's so competitive. Still wondering if this post is about me.

If you do all the work you’re given, why would you be wondering if it’s about you? Your situation is entirely different from the one OP has posted about. Do you crave to be the center of attention or did you just post disingenuously?

If you’ve read the OP and her update it is clear to see that it is not about you.

A lot of people on here are bizarrely attacking the questioner. I worked for a local authority as a social work manager at different levels for years. It's a universal fact that some people work harder than others. The difficulty here is that the OP is blatantly taking the piss. No public service manager would knowingly allow/agree to someone travelling between home and work during their paid start/finish times. That would be be a disciplinary for the manager as it's not allowed. Think about it. If the manager has agreed individual arrangements with a staff member to work differently to other team members, it's something that would be explained in a team meeting with all staff present - for obvious reasons. Again, think about it. The information presented indicates that the staff member is taking the piss. This occasionally happens, unfortunately, but it's really not ok. It creates resentment and affects team morale. It also has a knock of affect on the service users. I was one of those managers who was universally described by my employees as "firm but fair". People who weren't prepared/unable to do their contractually agreed job (barring sickness, sudden emergencies, etc) were scrutinised and, if improvements weren't made, were brought into the disciplinary process.

What makes me cross about the conversation is the great British public are very quick to accuse public sector workers of being shirkers but lots of people on this thread are arguing that it's ok for this to happen because she has young children. That's so unfair on the rest of the team who are picking up her work in addition to their own. And it's all very well to tell the questioner and her colleagues to simply not do that, but if they're working with vulnerable service users, and they have a conscience then the rest of the team will feel that they have to do it - for pretty obvious reasons...

@Amanteani Quite. You can bet your bottom dollar that they’d be outraged if they or their loved ones were impacted by poor service provision because of OP’s situation, but as long as it’s not them then it’s none of anyone’s business.

Some really entitled working parents on this thread. 🙄

this is totally the OP’s business; a colleague is skiiving and causing greater workload for everyone else.

you don’t get a free pass as a parent. I’m a working parent - I work flexibly, but if I lose time, I make up for it elsewhere.

Well said, @Amanteani

I’m a working mum and it might seem like I work in a similar way to your colleague… what most people don’t see is that I don’t take a lunch break and I work 2 hours (5-7am) before my children wake up to make up the hours that I know I miss when I’m on the school run.

if she can get her work done as she needs, what is the issue with the way she is choosing to work/prioritise? If you have a higher workload and you don’t like it, that’s for you to manage and resolve with your boss; don’t take it out on her because she has created a work life balance for her family that works.

In the workplace, we should be supporting working parents, not going out of our way to make them feel like they need to be chained to their desks/diaries/9-5 just because that’s how it has always been done. Just because you put in the hours, doesn’t mean you are working harder/smarter/more effectively.

YABU - focus on your own job.

(Different if she is doing a bad job… but it doesn’t sound like that from your description)

@TiredMama05 I agree workplaces should facilitate flexible working.

Presumably yours is done with the consent/knowledge of your manager & colleagues?

The OP says she knows for certain that the colleague does not have a flexible working arrangement.

And as a result it’s causing natural resentment with not only her but the rest of the team, who are also affected by it.