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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be upset by this comment

73 replies

waitingwhilethepaintdries · 31/08/2022 17:14

My ds (6) has a friend at school and I went for a play date with his mum a few days ago, not the first time and we met in the local park.
His friend asked his mum in front of me if my ds could come back and play and their house and she responded "nope I can only handle so much of ds, he's ok in small doses"
I found this quite offensive but didn't say anything.
My son isn't badly behaved and gets along well with her son.
Anyway she has just text to see if I want to meet for another play date this week.
Am I being over sensitive? I would never say that to anyone about their child.

OP posts:
Butterdishtea · 31/08/2022 17:15

That's appallingly rude.

I would only meet up if it suits.

MajorCarolDanvers · 31/08/2022 17:16

Is there any chance she was joking?

If not - its very rude.

KangarooKenny · 31/08/2022 17:17

I’d say no thanks, I can only take so much if your son.

KangarooKenny · 31/08/2022 17:18

*of

FlissyPaps · 31/08/2022 17:18

Really rude and brash to say it infront of you and DS.

Fair enough if that’s how she feels but she could have said “oh not today maybe another time or at the park”.

Id be civil with her if the kids are friends but don’t be friendly with her.

Mumspair1 · 31/08/2022 17:18

Wow that was rude.

Original poster
waitingwhilethepaintdries · 31/08/2022 17:19

She wasn't joking, she even said no offence after to which assured me she had meant offence.

OP posts:
TheLoupGarou · 31/08/2022 17:19

Wtf! That's massively rude, even if she was thinking it!

How did you manage not to say something?

If the kids were friends I suppose I would meet up again, but in a park or whatever, not at her house. Can you invite the friend round to yours without her? Just don't expect it to be reciprocated.

chillipenguin · 31/08/2022 17:21

waitingwhilethepaintdries · 31/08/2022 17:19

She wasn't joking, she even said no offence after to which assured me she had meant offence.

Tell her know you can't stand the thought of spending too much time with her she's OK in small doses, no offence.

Jonagirl · 31/08/2022 17:21

Yanbu, that's really rude

NotSorry · 31/08/2022 17:21

She could have said "not today Johnny as we have to get back for tea/football practice/swimming lessons" but she chose to be rude instead - I'd not be arranging anything too soon with her

TheLoupGarou · 31/08/2022 17:21

I'm so glad my kids are now at an age where I do not need to interact as much with random parents!

cantthinkofabetterusername · 31/08/2022 17:22

I'd reply with "Thanks, but you're ok in small doses. No offence"

Sunnyqueen · 31/08/2022 17:23

I'd be pissed off at that too. The obvious response to her text would be 'sorry, I can only handle you once in a week.' I wouldn't stoop so low as to bring her son in to it jut that let's her know she's pissed you off with the comment and gives her a chance to apologise and try rectify it.

GreenWheat · 31/08/2022 17:24

I think I would say "DS is a bit unsure about meeting up again because he heard your comment about him only being OK in small doses. Another time maybe"

buzzbuzzybuzz · 31/08/2022 17:24

cantthinkofabetterusername · 31/08/2022 17:22

I'd reply with "Thanks, but you're ok in small doses. No offence"

Yup

Shes a right one

Fladdermus · 31/08/2022 17:27

She's unbelievably rude. Nope I wouldn't be meeting up with her this side of hell freezing over. Tell her no and tell her why.

WagathaChristieMystery · 31/08/2022 17:32

I would reply to her text telling her how she made you feel with her comment. It’s really unkind of her to say, and quite cheeky of her to suggest a future play date after just being rude about your son!

WagathaChristieMystery · 31/08/2022 17:33

buzzbuzzybuzz · 31/08/2022 17:24

Yup

Shes a right one

Show quote history

Ooh yes I’d be so tempted to reply with @cantthinkofabetterusername’s suggested message!

SunshineClouds1 · 31/08/2022 17:34

cantthinkofabetterusername · 31/08/2022 17:22

I'd reply with "Thanks, but you're ok in small doses. No offence"

This

MissyB1 · 31/08/2022 17:34

Honestly she needs a sarky reply. “No thanks ds and I can only cope with small doses of you”.

GoneWithTheWine1 · 31/08/2022 17:35

I would take that as she doesn't like kids other than her own. Hardly unusual.

Original poster
waitingwhilethepaintdries · 31/08/2022 17:39

I had just taken the hint and not expected to hear from her again and so far I haven't responded. Maybe for my ds sake I will agree to meet up but invite other mums as a distraction.

OP posts:
Ihatethenewlook · 31/08/2022 17:41

I’d take that as there is something unpleasant or tiring about your ds and she was trying to point it out diplomatically. I know plenty of people who think their children can do no wrong, when one child in particular of a very close friend of mine is a nasty little twat the whole time he’s in the vicinity of another child. Are you sure your ds is not doing something annoying?

MarinoRoyale · 31/08/2022 17:42

cantthinkofabetterusername · 31/08/2022 17:22

I'd reply with "Thanks, but you're ok in small doses. No offence"

I really hope you go with this!