Mileage allowance out of maintenance

[notalazybitch]

Dss's mother is a lazy cow. DP has always paid above the minimum recommended payment guide from cms. She is begging for more money from him even though we are struggling immensely financially. She is claiming everything under the sun so she doesn't have to work. I know that she has fiddled things so she gets more in benefits, I would love to report her for this but it would impact dss so I won't.
My question is whether DP can claim petrol costs for picking up and dropping off out of cms payments. The current costs are crippling us. How much would he be able to claim? She will not help with transport, it's 45 min drive.

Thank you

Whu can't he tell her each parent will be responsible to pick up DSS from now on i.e. share the driving?

Just pick up DSS and refuse to drop him off, she will have to pick him up from yours if she wants her parenting time...

@chillipenguin obviously moms not a millionaire and obviously I didn't mean you should still be paying maintenance while freezing and starving to death - more that all non-essentials should be stopped first and op said this is the last resort so that's that. They've done all they can so maintenance has to be reduced.

He has brilliant taste in women.

@SunnyD44 well she can get a job then instead of rinsing the benefits system and her childrens dads

OP - you’re getting a hard time here. I get it. Life is really tough at the moment. I’m sure you wouldn’t be ‘Penny-pinching’ over a tank of fuel a month if things weren’t really tough for you.
The fact of the matter is that he is overpaying the CMS amount, so if he went through them officially, you could save some money. People on here won’t like it, but you have to do what’s right for you.

@Yearoftheskinny thank you so much 😊
I do understand this is an emotive subject and people have strong opinions due to their own circumstances

I have no idea if you can claim a mileage allowance and PPs seem to be mixed in their views. You can ask for the maintenance to be reduced to something closer to the minimum if you’re really struggling though.

I think the issue with the cost of living crisis re maintenance is that RPs will think maintenance should go up as a result and NRPs will think it should go down. No one is really prepared for this!

@GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing yes I get that. Dss mum is just plain greedy however, she is like this in all areas not just over money. She has no reason at all not to work if she needs additional money, she is choosing not to and expecting everyone else to throw money at her

Why is it on these threads th solution is always put up that the struggling fily would have the DSC more as would be easier.

We then see the threads that the DSC have sent the bills ocketing in the house, eat too much and the Dad ( usually) has to contribute more to the house budget.

Would be interesting to know the actual amount he pays the context is everything.£160 pcm versus £100pcm is not a lot - £5.25 versus £3.28 - lets put it into context.

If the mother is too lazy to do a 50/50 share of the costs then I think he should though this being MN I doubt many will agree. Make sure she manages to not screw a farthing more from you and your hsusband with her little games. Maybe she should get a job as many do.

What about the penny-pinching mother, or does she get a free ride as she cares little for her daughter's well-being?

They live too far away from the child's school to do 50/50 because getting a child too and from school half the school year will cost way more fuel

I'd love 50/50 if it was practical but it isn't unfortunately

OP of course oyu would love 50:50 - no maintenance and your DP then contributing more to the house hold expenses and less for you!!