Hi all,
long-time lurker, signed up for a bit of advice.
my parents are both elderly, mum early 70s, Dad 81. He’s not been too well recently and actually seems to have gone rapidly downhill since 80. Mum is finding it a strain. I visit and help out when I can but I work super long hours and have my own household to navigate. I have a brother but he lives abroad and rarely visits so it feels like it’s just on me really.
They’ve been concerned but pragmatic about inflation, etc, so far saying they’ll get by but since the bills 80% rise confirmed mum has gone a bit odd. I was over there yesterday and she snapped at me for hoovering up an accident because it uses power and I could just sweep (it was glass so really I felt it needed a going over with the hoover).I found out from dad She’ stopped using the kettle in the day a few weeks ago and only has a morning cup of tea now, and yells at dad for making extra coffee. Turning the oven on you might as well announce you’re off to commit a war crime. She’s washing up in cold water and washing herself in the sink, eating less and looks really anxious all the time.
dad just stares into space and says he’ll be dead by the new year, it’s getting very hard to talk to him because he just zones out and shakes. I think he - and mum because she’s there all the time with him - needs more help but neither of them will hear of it. It’s getting really heartbreaking.
they’re not hugely well-off but they’re not poor by any means, worried about them both and if they’re acting like this I dread to think about the mental health of elderly people worse off. I know it’s so awful and myself and DH will also struggle a lot but there doesn’t seem like more I can do? Just needed to get it out I suppose.