Sil teaching Dd bad words

[Sunbehindtheclouds]

Does anyone else find this just bloody odd. Sil thinking it’s funny to teach Dd, only 4, to be rough and tell people to leave her alone/get lost etc and laughing when Dd gets all riled up and overstimulated and hitting and shouting at Dh and I?
Deliberately laughing when she does *naughty/challenging things, would you do that?

Less time with sil would solve that.

How old is SIL?! Only teenagers would find that funny.
Defo limit the time your little one spends time with her

@stopitleaveitgetdown In her forties! Strange isn’t it and bloody annoying. She thinks it’s funny as then jokes that she isn’t the one who has to deal with her. Just checking I’m not having a stick up my bum about it as it’s supposedly a *Joke

Distance yourself from her

@Sunbehindtheclouds no definitely no stick up your bum. Cannot believe she’s in her 40s and thinks this is funny.
Tell her to cut it out or you won’t bring your DD around her anymore

Why are you allowing your child to be around her if she's such a bad influence? You're the parent, put a stop to this.

@stopitleaveitgetdown Why would she do that and think it’s funny, Dd is already quite crazy at times and I do the opposite and try to calm her down a bit. It felt so awkward, we all just sat there but I was thinking ‘Shut up’ she was getting so wound up and shouting (Dd) plus there were people around, felt so embarrassed, who does that

@Aquamarine1029 She’s not around her often, thank goodness, if it happened again, we’d say something, but shouldn’t it be down to Dh to say it

Why aren't you taking charge of this and putting a stop to it? You just sit there like a lemon and let your SIL wind your child up?

I would say something and if she did it again cut contact. Does sil have children?

Don't allow her anywhere near your daughter, tell her to get lost and to leave you all alone!

@Aquamarine1029 I was waiting for her to stop, she then starting going really rough (Dd) and I picked her up and said ‘No, we don’t do that’ and said let’s go, does she know she’s doing it 🤷🏻‍♀️We spent the rest of the day trying to calm her back down

Why leave it to DH? DD is your child, & you are pissed off with her aunt.

Next time it happens - either leave immediately, or tell SiL to.

@Sunbehindtheclouds what does your DH say?

I can understand you not saying anything at first because I have been in a similar situation thinking "wait? Is she really doing this? Maybe it's a one off or just for laughs" but when I noticed it was happening quite often I shut the person down.

Why would she do that and think it’s funny,

Don't waste any time agonising over "why".
Just remove the source.

Every time. SiL will soon realise you mean business, when every time she acts the twat, you remove yourselves from her company.

Sounds like an idiot.

Keep her away from your child.

@stopitleaveitgetdown Yes, I was exactly the same, she did go on a bit, found it funny. Dh and I were just a bit awkward and waiting for her to finish, if it were to happen again, we’d shut it right down or at least I would if he didn’t

@KettrickenSmiled Easier said than done though isn’t it

BIL tried to teach DS to swear when he was 3, what a twat. Apparently it was hilarious. I asked who was finding it funny, as it turned out no one and it was confusing DS. DS was never in a room on his own with BIL again and we never gave an explanation, just stopped it happening.

Adults have no business being “awkward” when someone is messing around with their kid.

@BlueKaftan As in we were waiting for her to pack it in and were a bit gobsmacked it was happening!

@badbaduncle Its just not funny and so unfair on the child, I was so angry and we had an awful day and night trying to calm her down.

Also why laughing when Dd is shouting and hitting and we’re quite clearly struggling with her and she sees her brother struggling…so weird

Because she's a giant c u next tuesday who obviously enjoys your discomfort and lack of control over your daughter.
Your options are, to stay away from her, tell her to pack it in and leave if she doesn't or suck it up and keep trying to understand it.

@Chikapu But even doing that to her own brother. Even her Dh was saying sort of jokingly ‘Stop teaching her that or they won’t let us come again’
Do you think she has issues?

The first time will be hard, yeah.

But so much less work than spending the rest of the day trying to calm down an overstimulated DD.