To think I shouldn’t go on a second date?

[Rubyitsgonnabeyou]

First date was good, walk around the city and we got two coffees, the conversation was flowing.

When we parted ways we kissed. He messaged me about a second date.

This was Sunday. He text me last night to say he doesn’t think I find him attractive because when I kissed him I didn’t use my tongue.

I was a bit taken aback. For me it was a quick 30 second kiss. We weren’t making out, I think tongue is more intimate personally. It’s kind of put me off him that he’s questioning this.

It’s called an open mouth kiss -

“Although you might confuse an open-mouth kiss for a French kiss, they're not one in the same. In the case of an open-mouth kiss, tongue is optional. Often times, though, an open-mouth kiss without tongue will lead to one with tongue.“

And it’s kind of gross that anyone is judging me for doing that because that’s what I felt comfortable with.

I forgot to add, he also said to me that he’s too good looking for a dating app …

Oh god, bin him for that alone!

I’m another one who can’t imagine kissing without tongues, but whatever, if he was happy enough to do it at the time, it’s strange to be moaning about it after the event. Bullet dodged.

Right. I’m leaving this thread. The fact that people can’t comprehend that people do things differently is bizarre. I don’t care how any of you kiss, as long as it’s consensual and it’s what you felt comfortable doing.

And the fact that you’re all judging me for doing what I felt comfortable with is shocking. It was a first date. I don’t know this man.

Imagine if any of your daughters in the future are told that despite them doing what they felt comfortable with it’s very weird and you’d never do that’s and they should only do something to please a man.

Bullet dodged. By him. Complete overreaction, no one is judging you, people are curious.

No, don’t see him again. He sounds like a pillock. And you can kiss how you want to bloody kiss.

I am also fascinated by the idea of open mouthed, tongueless kissing, though. It’s not something I’ve come across before. DH and I just tried it and it felt very odd. Perhaps we weren’t doing it properly. 😂

You got 98% YANBU (pretty much unprecedented), unanimously supportive comments and also a few people wondering (in a completely amiable way) about tongueless kissing. And that’s made you feel judged and flounce?!

Well, I’m certainly judging you now!

Is he 15 years old? Back away now!

m.youtube.com/watch?v=goLssHWIYRo

Literally a video on how to do it. There’s nothing wrong with doing that on a first date, it’s intimate without being ott.

The people questioning it are a bit odd. The fact you cannot imagine how to do it and some think it’s holding lips together? Honestly stop embarrassing yourselves.

I’m not seeing anyone who has said there’s anything wrong with it. And there’s nothing embarrassing about not having done it (or anything else).

Obviously we've all done that @habitsimtryingtokick . It's the start of a kiss.
The bit that's hard to imagine, is doing that constantly for thirty seconds, without moving on.

And the fact that you’re all judging me for doing what I felt comfortable with is shocking.

But that’s not a fact, most people are supporting you. Have you told him to fuck off?

Immediate block. The man is a creepy insecure oddball.

Can't believe people are querying how you can kiss for thirty seconds without using tongue? I wouldn't tounge kiss someone on a first date. In fact I don't use much tounge even when kissing passionately. It is entirely possible!

Well, that escalated quickly…

You’re a strange one …

Surely if you weren’t feeling it you’d just pull out of the kiss, not keep on?

weirdo. Stick to your guns and get rid