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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Moving a child away from the bottom of the slide

106 replies

amamma · 17/08/2022 14:12

I was on the playground with my DD. There was a little boy who I moved out of the way a couple of times, because he was standing at the bottom of the slide and others were coming down. I did ask him to move, but he didn't, so I gently moved him.

I also did the same to my DD a few times.

Is that OK ? I'm paranoid it's super out of line. The mum was nearby but she was sitting down chatting, so she didn't see that he could have been hurt by another child coming down. She saw me do it and didn't seem do mind. I absolutely wouldn't mind if another adult did that to my children.

Opinions ?

OP posts:

FlyingSaucerss · 17/08/2022 16:06

Brefugee · 17/08/2022 16:01

Like I said, sending your child down to hurt them is much better isn’t it 🙄

you are so bloody determined to misunderstand. Whatever. I hope your DD loves being dragged off things because other parents don't supervise their kids and you're too much of a wet lettuce to move them.

I'd send my DD down and if she knocked the boy over, he'd soon learn not to stand in the way again.

what have I misunderstood? it’s here clearly for you since you have such difficult reading.

Zippy1510 · 17/08/2022 16:09

I tend to tell children they need to move and if it doesn't work use my arm/body to block them either going up slides or lingering at the bottom. I once had to lift a child who went charging up a slide whilst a much larger child was already on their way down. I couldn't care less if it angers their parents, they should be supervising.

Brefugee · 17/08/2022 16:10

haha - i also mentioned a few other things i might do too - so you understand the use of hyperbole right?
That was the last thing after things like asking who he was with and actually, you know moving him out of the way.

Sorry if it wasn't clear i wouldn't actually do it.

Again: you are determined to be a wet lettuce. That's up to you. Me? I'd move the child, physically and ask him who he was with. Because I think the current fear around either touching a stranger's child, or having a stranger touch your child in these circumstances is totally batshit

dandelionthistle · 17/08/2022 16:14

I would have done as you did, and if you had done that to my child I'd have been grateful.

I would have been annoyed at having to effectively look after someone else's child though so I'd be quietly hoping my DC moved to another bit of the playground soon!

Cant get my head around either actively encouraging my DC to move away rather than deal with the child directly, or deliberately standing by and letting the child get hurt.

V grateful mine are now largely big enough to navigate the playground without close supervision, so this sort of thing rarely falls to me to intervene. But obvs if I'm the closest adult I feel obliged to.

Livpool · 17/08/2022 16:30

FlyingSaucerss · 17/08/2022 14:14

I wouldn’t have moved him. In this situation I tell dd to play on something else

Exactly!

I saw a child get kicked quite forcefully on the back last week when they sat at the bottom of the slide for too long. The other child showed them to move then said they were coming down.

You did the right thing OP

mam0918 · 17/08/2022 16:31

TheOrigRights · 17/08/2022 15:12

and I presume you are closely supervising him then.

If I saw an unsupervised child about to get hurt I would move them. I guess subconsciously I'd make my own risk assessment : chances of toddler getting hurt by incoming child down slide = 97% vs chances of causing serious injury to toddler due to invisible disability = vanishingly small (thankfully).

mam0918 - are you suggesting people shouldn't move a child in danger?

Show quote history

Im saying people shouldnt assume anything, this entire thead is people assuming about somthing that was an assumption in the first place.

OP does not know this child, childs mother or anything about the situation but CLEARLY has an anxiety disorder. Just from the irratic overthinking of this post and they way she writes I would take the actual 'risk' of the situation with a big pinch of salt.

Also for the record I am also disabled, yes I watch my DS like a hawk but no I can not physically chase him around picking him up. He has never been at risk or got hurt and no one else has ever took it upon themselves to man handle him out of the way of their kids - thats not how the world works.

The view that the risk of a child you dont know being disabled is 'vanishingly small' is ignorant and abilist.

Leafy3 · 17/08/2022 16:34

It was fine, I'd have done the same

maddiemookins16mum · 17/08/2022 16:35

Eunorition · 17/08/2022 14:15

Literally no one noticed or cared. Of course you were right to move him. We don't all have to make a massive drama of every small human interaction.

This. The world has gone mad that someone can’t gently ‘nudge’ (for want of a better expression) a wain away from the bottom of the slide.

Mariposista · 17/08/2022 16:36

Yeah the ‘could be disabled’ argument doesn’t cut it for me neither - if the kid can hurl itself down the slide it can be moved gently off it. If ai saw a toddler about to step into a busy road while its mother had her head down in a phone (yes, this has happened), I would grab them by the arm and prevent an accident, no question.

TheOrigRights · 17/08/2022 16:53

The view that the risk of a child you dont know being disabled is 'vanishingly small' is ignorant and abilist.

I haver never been called ignorant or ableist.

I stand by my assumption that the risk of me harming a child by moving them from the bottom of a slide is vanishingly small. Please explain how this makes me ignorant and ableist?

Teaandtoastedbiscuits · 17/08/2022 16:56

I would have moved him but I would have wondered was it an OK thing to do too

Happyhappyday · 17/08/2022 17:09

I think it’s fine you moved him but if it was going to be just an uncomfortable knock rather than a trip to a&e, I would let him & his mum learn from experience. I’ve intervened with toddlers at the swings where they are literally about to get booted in the face but slides arent going to br that bad.

Mariposista · 17/08/2022 17:10

TheOrigRights · 17/08/2022 16:53

The view that the risk of a child you dont know being disabled is 'vanishingly small' is ignorant and abilist.

I haver never been called ignorant or ableist.

I stand by my assumption that the risk of me harming a child by moving them from the bottom of a slide is vanishingly small. Please explain how this makes me ignorant and ableist?

It doesn't. But sadly this is MN, where words like 'abilist' get bandied about in almost all situations, even when it's someone trying to prevent a child/several children from having a nasty accident.
I'll be honest I hadn't even heard the term 'abilist' before coming on this site haha.

allyouneedismarmite · 17/08/2022 17:56

Flittingaboutagain · 17/08/2022 14:39

I'm afraid if a parent isn't adequately supervising then yep I'll move their kid to ensure they or mine don't get hurt.

Absolutely agree.

StoneofDestiny · 17/08/2022 18:32

Of course you were right to move him. He was at risk and he was stopping other children using the slide. If the parent wasn't bothered, it would be ridiculous to just leave a child in harms way.

Blimey - cannot understand why you wouldn't! Would people leave him standing in front of a swing in motion too if he wasn't moving voluntarily. Bonkers.

shedheaven · 17/08/2022 18:40

Sidisawetlettuce · 17/08/2022 14:17

I'd send my DD down and if she knocked the boy over, he'd soon learn not to stand in the way again.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

MissMaple82 · 17/08/2022 18:50

Findahouse21 · 17/08/2022 14:13

I wouldn't physically move a child I didn't know, no.

Oh for goodness sake! He was about to be hit by a flying human

MissMaple82 · 17/08/2022 18:51

Stop worrying, it's ridiculous that anyone would take offense to you preventing a child from being hurt! Absolute nonsense

Barbie222 · 17/08/2022 18:54

I think you were very kind. To me that's the sort of thing that you just leave to natural consequences!

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 17/08/2022 18:55

This happens all the time. I usually just tell them to watch out

Mumofsend · 17/08/2022 19:02

Barbie222 · 17/08/2022 18:54

I think you were very kind. To me that's the sort of thing that you just leave to natural consequences!

Quite. A child going down a slide into them is going to be a bump but it isn't going to be a significant bump that I would panic over.

endofline · 17/08/2022 19:03

Eunorition · 17/08/2022 14:15

Literally no one noticed or cared. Of course you were right to move him. We don't all have to make a massive drama of every small human interaction.

This!

GuerlainHo · 17/08/2022 19:03

I’m confused…if the mother didn’t seem to mind, the child was unbothered and you didn’t think you were doing anything wrong, why are you questioning it and asking for opinions?

its done now. Case closed

landonbaby · 17/08/2022 19:21

I would do the same and also wouldn't bay an eye lid if someone did that with my child but that's just me

Sidisawetlettuce · 17/08/2022 20:15

dworky · 17/08/2022 15:21

So you'd deliberately hurt a young child to prove a point to it's mother?

Show quote history

No, I'd do it so the young child wouldn't stand at the bottom of the slide again.

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