To think women are more toxic than people would like to admit?

[MarthaMayver]

I'd like to start by saying by no means are all women toxic, I'm a female myself and have always been a huge supporter of feminism and "sisterhood" if you will. However the more behaviour I witness from women, I'm starting to stray away from seeing them as allies.

I have worked in female dominated sectors my entire life and have constantly had to witness cliques, gossiping, power plays, passive aggressiveness, and downright bullying. I had to leave my last job as it was affecting my mental health so badly.

I always thought this was just part and parcel of working in groups. However I started a new job last year, with an equal spread of male and female colleagues and there has been none of this. I'm now wondering if the problem with all of my previous workplaces was the fact that they were female dominated.

To me, it's very obvious in person how women favour men over their own gender, regardless of how much "female empowerment" and "Women Supporting Women" is preached these days. For example, they will let men get away with mistakes they wouldn't let other women get away with. Male incompetence is often seen as "cute", whereas the same behaviour coming from a woman would be laughed or sneered at.

There are so many stories coming out in recent years of mothers favouring their sons over their daughters, and at worst bullying and abusing their daughters whilst worshiping their sons. I now think back to my own childhood and I can remember many occasions where my mother would put me down for something, while supporting my male siblings for doing the same thing. There were also a lot of sly, underhand insults that I didn't realize at the time, that were never directed towards my brothers.

I'm prepared to be told IBU, but I'm also very interested in knowing how many people agree, or if anyone has any similar experiences.

But what’s the societal outcome of toxic women in workplaces? What effects do we see in society specifically due to that?

But they don’t kill at anywhere near the rates men do. Women as a class are nowhere near as violent as men as a class.

@Bubblebubblebah
you say “C - i believe there are many more women murderes than we know about. They just don't do it obviously like many man do.”
why do you believe this? What evidence do you have? Women used to murder more- since they have gained more rights (possibly because of this but who knows) they have murdered less- do you think there is a worldwide conspiracy to cover up female murder?
some cultures/countries are so desperate to blame murder and wrong doing on women, that they literally (Still!) try them for witchcraft. What’s the argument here? Women are so excellent at being sneaky, at the global level, they are murdering at the same rate as men but are just getting away with it?

Yeah, but only a fraction of a percent of men murder whilst there are loads of horrid bitchy women. I've met loads of the latter and none of the former

You may have met some of the former. How do you know?

I am sorry you have met ^loads^ of the latter. You need to choose who you surround yourself with, far more carefully.

Your vibe attracts your tribe. Maybe take a look at yourself and see why you are surrounded by these 'horrid bitchy women'.

And my experience is exactly the opposite. So?

That’s true. But how is this relevant to the topic of workplace behaviours and general social interaction?

If a woman bullies another woman in the workplace that woman may leave her job. She may need to claim benefits. Her children may suffer due to increased poverty. She may become depressed. If the 'toxic' woman remains she may create a 'toxic' culture which ruins the organisation.

oh dear...i was a teacher for 27 years....last 3 years i had all female managers....the only words i can use are....vile, bitter, evil, nasty, poisonous....the men were not saints but these 2 women were just total c*ts....i would happily drive over them if ever i saw them in the road....but they all moved on and lived miles from me now...!!

😮😆

It isn’t, I was replying to your follow up post. This was my original question to you, in case you missed it.

Sorry, didn’t quote.

Nice victim blaming. So women who are bullied so badly by other women they're driven to suicide are bringing it on themselves? Lovely stuff.

Fucks sake, this one.

Oh that's just paranoid bollocks. Women are perfectly capable of being bitchy and obnoxious without any help from men.

Life simply isn't that complicated.

So that’s a chain of events that might happen, sure. But are we seeing a massive increase in poverty due specifically to toxic women in the workplace?

Suicide
Stress related work absences leading to resigning/unemployment,
mental illness,
low self esteem and it’s hit to lifetime earnings and potential.

Most people are cunts in one way or another regardless of sex.

The only time I got close to depression was a three year period I only worked with females.
It was horrendous.
I was sneered and tutted at for being petite, accused of having eating disorders because I must "starve myself to stay that size", lies and false complaints brought against me every other week.
There was constant competition and bitching about other people.

We worked with children and the things they would say about the parents were awful. They all talked about superficial materialistic things, they talked shit about their husbands and partners all day long. It was obnoxious.

But again, do you have any evidence that these problems are specifically linked to toxic women in the workplace?

If you don’t support feminism, then hand back your right to vote, to work, to education, to maternity leave, to drive etc.

Did feminists even win the right to vote?

I thought women got the right to vote at the same time as most men (army veterans and the wealthy elite notwithstanding)?

It was more down to the end of the war than a few women blinding innocent postal workers with letter bombs and attempting (thankfully unsuccessfully) to detonate bombs in churches and other public places.

I'm not interested in divisive identity politics. If I support a cause then I support all people it works to help, regardless of colour or sex.

Why would there be an increase? It’s not like women bullying women is a new thing. Just the fact that a higher % of women than men are in poverty, suffer from mental illness and permanently exit working (become economically inactive as in unemployed and not looking for work) is evidence enough that workplaces can be toxic to women and other women are a known contributing factor to toxic workplaces.

I couldn’t agree more OP

Right, but do you have any evidence that there are any widespread issues in society specifically from toxic women in the workplace?

@CrapBag39
😭so true

Again, you’re assuming everyone starts from a position of equality. Which is false.