First family dog?

[gotelltheoldmandowntheroad]

Husband wants a German Shepherd, he also likes XL Bully and Rottweiler.

I am open to a dog but...

small house
do not want fur everywhere

We have two cats already so would look into getting a puppy.
We have a big garden and both often work from home so wouldn't leave him alone.

I know about having dogs, had them before, but not too keen, I'm a cat person. Husband and child are keen. Husband spoke about "family protection" but ultimately we are animal lovers but that seems to be a factor for him.

My questions are:

Dogs that won't add the least to my cleaning burden (that's my bag)

Safest around the child (from puppy and trained)

Perhaps that a non-dog person might like best?

Given he's mentioned those three breeds, which would you go for? Child is 6.

If you don’t like needy dogs German sheperds are absolutely not for you, I have one. I’d never in a million years have an XL bully with young kids. Best bet is rottie however in your circumstances I would not recommend. Get a cockapoo.

I wouldn’t get any of those dogs with a young child in a small house and certainly not if you want a non shedding dog! My DH wanted a specific type of dog for the look (beagle) but quickly realised that it wouldn’t suit our family.

If you are definitely going to get a dog (and it doesn’t sound like you’re really on board!) you need to look at all the characteristics and pick a breed on that basis not just because of the look of it.

If you don't want a dog,you shouldn't be getting one.

I'd consider the desire to have a macho 'status' dog at all, and especially with a toddler in the house, a massive red flag in a partner/husband tbh.

Would you really want an XL Bully around your child? My son is the same age and I wouldn’t let him go on a play date to a house that had a dog like that. Yes I know they can be trained beautifully but no animal can be 100% and those powerful jaws would always be at the back of my mind.

I’d not let any of my kids visit a friend’s house with an xl bull in it. They are fucking scary. I don’t care how often owners insist it’s a big softy or whatever. I don’t trust those dogs around kids. The damage could be catastrophic. End of.

I do understand that any dog can and would cause carnage…but those bulls are an outright NO for me.

Compromise and get a staffy. Smaller, cuter, known for being good among families. Tell your dh to get real regarding the other status breeds. It’s not about him and his accessory. It concerns all of you.

I imagine they meant Collie Rough (Lassie Dog) as opposed to a Border Collie.

Collie Roughs are amazing dogs with wonderful temperaments but very hairy.

Dog rescues are generally full of Staffies. 😞

OP, really really think about this. You don't actually want a dog.

No matter what your dh or child say, the brunt of the shitwork to do with the dog will almost inevitably come to you. It'll be under your feet all day while you're trying to work.

People should only get dogs 1. they actively want, 2. understand how to train & look after, and 3. are prepared to do the work with. You fail at the first hurdle, because you don't want a dog, let alone the rest of it. You really don't want to be adding another half-trained, resented, rejected dog to the rescue centres in 12 months time.

Get a stuffed dog, you can get a great big massive one, it won't shed, bark or poo. Perfect.

Seriously, DO NOT GET A DOG.... at all. You clearly don't want one and puppies are a lot of work abs require a lot of training and work if you with them to evolve into a really good dog. My girl (border terrier) is brilliant and a very easy dog but even she was a lot of work. And of course it's ongoing, there is never a point when you can say that's it my work is done.

The breeds you mentioned are crazy for an inexperienced family with small children. Jesus, your husband must have a tiny cock if he will only consider those breeds. My DS asked me the other day if I would allow him to have a dog, I said yes depending on what breed. He says American Bully and my answer was a flat no. I have my border and two cats, none of whom I would put at risk.

I repeat, do not get a dog unless it is a stuffed one.

They also require a great deal of mental stimulation as they are so bright.

I work with dangerous dogs.

I wouldn’t touch an XL bully with someone else’s barge pole.
Rottweilers can be lovely…but they can also be very unpredictable. They need confident and experienced owners who know what they are doing.
A well bred GSD would be the best choice of the 3, however I would not recommend at all for a novice owner. They can be reactive, overprotective and need lots of training.

All 3 are active working dogs, a GSD for example can work for hours each day. Can you provide what it needs mentally?

All dogs smell to some extent. They drag mud in on their paws, damage things, dribble water when they drink. If you can’t cope with this I honestly wouldn’t bother.

Get a Greyhound! Minimal shedding, as they have no dander. While appearing to be the size of a small kangaroo, they can curl up quite compactly or take up an entire 3 seater sofa roaching like an upside down cockroach. They are extremely sweet, funny and mostly quiet dogs and need minimal exercise. They are more chilled like cats but usually super affectionate: Because of their relaxed nature, they are even approved of as smaller apartment dogs.

PS: There are quite a number of Greyhounds that are fine with cats. Greyhounds are generally more relaxed than their smaller cousins, Whippets who can be more wired by comparison. Don't tell your DH that they aren't generally guard dogs. You may have to bark yourself. 😀

Why do I read half the threads on here lately and assume they're a wind up?

I think OP has put the realities of her situation on the table very plainly perhaps just to show her husband this thread. He can then read about how he is being an ‘insecure’ ‘tool’ and everyone is basically going to think his penis is tiny. (Nothing wrong with a small penis - but you certainly don’t buy an XL bully to compensate for it).

Why are people suggesting collies and whippets etc??

The OPs daft husband wants either a German shepherd, Rottweiler or XL Bully … clearly he wants a penis extension so he’s not going to agree to a bloody poodle is he?

reminds me of the thread where a woman wanted to choose between a number of giant or very large dogs … she mentioned Great Danes, Irish Wolfhounds, St Bernard’s etc and her main criteria was that the dog must be BIG ….

People started suggesting Spaniels and Jack Russells!! 🤦‍♀️

This!

Our old retriever was a perfect family pet when we had small children. He would just plod around the house and plop himself down near whatever I was doing. Then when I sat down he'd come and rest his head on my lap for a bit of fuss. He was really placid and patient and had not the slightest hint of aggression his whole life. He was only bouncy when he was very young.

If you aren't 100% on board with the idea of a dog just don't do it. You are the one that will end up doing everything for the dog. All the breeds your DH wants are completely unsuitable as family pets with a small child in the house. I adore german shepherds but wouldn't have one with small children. When choosing a breed you need to consider what they were originally bred for because that will influence their behaviour. For a family pet, you are better off looking at gundog breeds with bite inhibition like retrievers, labs or spaniels. That's not to say that those other breeds can't make good pets, but you would need to put a lot more work into them and it's a more significant risk especially if they don't come from a good breeder.

If you are in any doubt about the difference breed can make perhaps just take some time to look at this list of fatal dog attacks in the UK. Hint, there are no golden retrievers, labs or spaniels on there. All your DH's suggestions are featured several times, as are Staffordshire bull terriers (despite people insisting they are good with children).

Why is it that men always want this type of dog? Is it to make them feel more masculine?

I used to feel like that when little dogs barked at my goldie but now I have a little dog and she's been chased through woods until she dived into a lake to get away by big dogs twice when off lead and barrelled over multiple times by overenthusiastic albeit friendly labs and just generally overwhelmed more times than I can count by people letting their friendly labs approach her even when she's clearly terrified and cowering away. So now she barks at labs when she's on a lead even if they aren't doing anything to her and I get it.

Only a total moron would consider an XL bully with a young child.

Yabu not to have shut that shit down immediately.

If my husband kept banging on about his hard man penis-extension dog search he'd be told he was welcome to have any dog he wanted in his own flat.

I know MumsNet hates them - but I have a cavapoochon and he is a dream. Easy to train, great temperament, and you can’t even tell a dog lives in the house - doesn’t leave his fur anywhere! Would easily get a second one in a heartbeat once current pup is a bit older!

Please don’t get any of those breeds. It’s a recipe for disaster. If you want little mess and non shedding get a rescue wire haired terrier of some description, but not a Patterdale, Lakeland or Fell. We have 5 dogs and the smallest is a wiry mongrel terrier who has loads of character, is very friendly to family and friends but is also the one most likely to alert us to anyone trying to get into the house.

Your DH is bonkers OP, he clearly knows nothing about those breeds apart from that they supposedly look “hard”

honestly my lab will bark if there’s something outside the house he’s unsure of , such as when there were people climbing on next doors garage (turned out to be their son but nice that he told us!) so in that sense he’s a great alert dog (but as soon as an intruder actually got into our house he would run up to them for scritches and kisses lol) so I don’t think you necessarily need a big fierce dog for protection per se.

Sounds like your husband wants a status dog .
It doesn't sound like you have the space and room for a big dog so maybe choose something smaller like a Labrador or spaniel .