I'm next, aren't I?? :(

[namechangemam]

Background: I have severe emetophobia and my anxiety is through the roof and beyond, so please no nasty comments. 😓

Toddler DD threw up randomly Tuesday night, was only sick once then perfectly fine. Last night (48 hrs later) older DD was sick. This morning DP has thrown up.

I am just waiting now for my turn. It's inevitable that the bug will get me, isn't it? 😞

DP thinks I could be OK as it was him who cleaned up toddler DD's sick on Tues and not me, and he looked after her all day the next day while I went to work. But I'm not so sure.

Im so scared. If it's going to happen I just want it over asap. 😢😢😢

The more you imagine you got it, the more likely you are to get it ;) So try to make yourself think you will not catch it. Fear makes your immune system weaker.

I don't have emetophobia, but I can still manage to empathise, unlike some idiots who have come on with their ignorant remarks which totally and utterly miss the point. A phobia can be very debilitating. It's not that the OP would simply prefer not to get sick (like the rest of us). It's that she's utterly terrified of getting sick. Maybe check the dictionary definition of 'phobia'. Jeez.

It's not inevitable that you will get sick @namechangemam. We've had just 2 or 3 out of the 4 of us catching vomiting bugs several times. I hope you'll be ok

🤣🤣

No it isn't inevitable. Just keep bleaching and if possible use a separate toilet to those who are sick.

fellow emetophobe here OP, I get it. The stress will make you feel ill. There is no guarantee you will get it but if you do it will never be as bad as you imagine (hold onto that).

As an aside I had CBT for mine years ago, it didn't cure me but has taught me how to cope.

I keep clinell wipes and ecohydra foam in the cupboard for these situations.

Good luck.

And by the way I mean bleach on surfaces not on hands

When mine were little I coped by having a routine. I had a sickness bug kit with bleach, spray bleach, gloves, bin bags, disposable dish cloths in the top of a wardrobe.

Anything that had sick on was bagged up and either thrown away or washed at 90. The bagging stops the particles spreading round the house as you move it. Constant bleaching of door handles etc. Only eat hot food and keep the ill person to using one toilet.

We had loads where only one person had it. Maybe luck maybe not but it made me feel more in control of the situation and so took at least some of the stress away.

The more you imagine you got it, the more likely you are to get it

You can feel sick by imagining you've got it. The power of the mind.....

We were also lucky when they were very little in that DH is OK with sick and seemingly never catches tummy bugs

Yes, it's quite interesting, isn't it? Whenever I've had it, there is always a point when something 'clicks' and I know it's over, even if the symptoms haven't fully subsided yet. I'm assuming that's when the T cells have started to prevail!

Hope you keep well and maybe try hypnotherapy if you haven't already? I know people have had success dealing with phobias by listening to hypno audio podcasts rather than having to visit a therapist.

My kids are 9 and 4 now and I have never caught any vomiting bug from them. It's been in the house plenty of times but it never seems to get me. There was one my son had once that I held the sick buckets, did the cleaning etc but didn't catch it. My husband caught it. My mum who was visiting at the time caught it. Went home, gave it to my dad also. I don't know why in all these years I have avoiding vomiting bugs. But not in my life have I ever remembered catching one. So maybe you might be lucky?

A couple of my friends have emetophobia, they have cast iron constitutions as they (and you probably) have practised so hard not being sick. So bugs that fell their husbands and children don't effect them! I am sure you will be absolutely fine. I do feel for you, it's a terrible phobia as so hard to avoid!

Not necessarily OP.

My DS was throwing up last week, DD followed a couple of days later. I haven't got sick myself despite being literally thrown up on and cleaning up after both kids.

It's not a given. Try not to worry.

I hope that you are ok OP - the fear is terrible.

I'm emetophobic and no therapy or common-sense thinking has changed that.

My response to vomiting (or even news of it in the area) is physical and out of all proportion. I feel the adrenaline rush of fight or flight- I sweat and mouth dries - I shake and my mind becomes hyper-focused on this.

I would always choose a route of actual danger over one that exposes me to norovirus.

I am ashamed of this reaction and try to disguise it. It has wasted days of my life. (No-one has ever pandered to my ridiculous over-reaction to a minor illness. I've not asked them to.)

Things improved for me as I have owned up to my feelings and when (due to pregnancy or sick children) I've had no choice but to go through my greatest fears and cope. The improvement has always been temporary .

I am proud of not having passed my horror on to my children. They are tidy vomit-ers but otherwise unaffected.

Not necessarily if you aren't a sickly kind of person. I'm very rarely sick and have a 4 year old DD who has had a few sickness bugs. Usually I catch it but still am not sick, just have a sore stomach. I'll admit there was one time I caught it off her and was sick (first time in about a decade) and I coped surprisingly well, despite also having a mild phobia due to how rarely it happens to me. I'm confident you will be ok too.

I haven’t got this particular phobia but I can imagine how awful it must be. My 3 year old just had a sickness bug and I got it but DH didn’t. He cleared up after her as well so there is hope! Fingers crossed. Hopefully you’re immune.

@namechangemam

I'd really recommend you looking up the Thrive programme. Their success with helping people with phobias who have tried everything to no avail is fantastic. I suffered for years with a different issue and I was cured within a few weeks. The difference it has made to my life has been transformative.

It's all about changing your thinking. You have to put a lot of work into it but the results are life changing. Please do go to their website and have a look. You don't need to live with this phobia ruling your life.

Something that really helps me when I'm scared of being sick is remembering that while it's a horrible feeling, it's my body's way of ejecting something that's harming me. So I think of it now actually as a healing process - my body is healing itself by removing toxins from my body and so it's not a disgusting process, it's actually a cleansing process. Visualising it as cleansing and healing really helps me to calm down when I feel nauseous and start panicking - it's natural, it's cleansing, it's healing, and it will help rather than harm me.

Hopefully this bug will pass over you but please, please, look up Thrive. Honestly life is too short to live in fear of something so inconsequential (I know it doesn't feel inconsequential right now). You owe it to yourself!

@namechangemam oh I sympathise. I have emetaphobia too, and a 3 year old.

On 2 occasions now, my toddler has been violently sick with a bug. First time my husband also caught it baaad and I was literally surrounded by vomit for 4 days (husband did also have shingles, poor bugger). Worst 4 days of my life. I didn’t catch it 🤷🏻‍♀️

Then the other occasion toddler was sick several times in 24 hours but we didn’t end up being sick, just a mild case of pooping.

Hopefully this provides a little bit of reassurance 🤞🏼 You will worry and it will be shit but you WILL get through it.

If you don’t follow her, I highly recommend Anna Marthur on Instagram. She is also a sufferer of emetaphobia!

I can't help raising an eyebrow at people who have "severe emetophobia" and yet have multiple children. Children get sick - they're sick often when little!

Hope you survive this OP. It doesn't sound fun.

ah yes we just shouldn't have children eh problem solved.

@roarfeckingroarr Because I was determined not to let this phobia prevent me from having something I really wanted. It stops me from doing a number of things as it is. Yes, it has gone worse since having children but it was something I was prepared for and I tried to sort it out before having children but what I did didn’t help. I am now I’m having CBT. Just because I have children doesn’t mean my phobia isn’t severe. It’s really, really hard to the point where when I’m at my lowest with it, I’ve wished I could turn back time. I love them and don’t regret them one bit though.

Raise your eyebrows all you like. That says more about you than anyone else.

Do you also raise an eyebrow at people with agoraphobia who try their best to venture out of the house? Or someone with OCD who touches something someone else with germs might have touched?

Life goes on. It has to.

Also - just another thought for you - you have no idea of the circumstances of my children's conception. So don't be so fucking rude.

Maybe you could get some anti emetic tablets if you are really worried about throwing up. I know when you’re sick with a bug throwing up helps your body to remove whatever it is and help you to get better, but if it’s making you stressed that will lower your immune response too. Speak to your gp x

ps not inevitable you’ll get it, partner and daughter had covid earlier this year and me and my newborn shared a room with them and escaped it, viruses are weird things!

Woah I wished you well - no need to be so sensitive! I just meant that to me having emetophobia and having children sounds like having a phobia of spiders and moving to rural Australia. I have a phobia of slugs and certainly don't venture where they're likely to be when it's damp. I was bemused, not critical. jesus.

It’s an awful phobia. I’ve suffered from it, and although after much therpay I am a lot better than I was - its always there in the background.

There is no certainty you’ll get it OP. In fact, as others have said - you are probably less likely to get it because you have stayed away from the vomit and no doubt have washed your hands very thoroughly.

My DD had a nasty sickness bug a couple of months ago. Was very sick over a 6 hour period. I held back her hair, rubbed her back, held the bucket etc (which would have been unheard of before therapy) - and I didn’t catch it.

I do have a supply of Clinell wipes (green wipes) - which kill norovirus, and a sterizar hand gel which is also effective against norovirus - they were well used that week!