I'm next, aren't I?? :(

[namechangemam]

Background: I have severe emetophobia and my anxiety is through the roof and beyond, so please no nasty comments. 😓

Toddler DD threw up randomly Tuesday night, was only sick once then perfectly fine. Last night (48 hrs later) older DD was sick. This morning DP has thrown up.

I am just waiting now for my turn. It's inevitable that the bug will get me, isn't it? 😞

DP thinks I could be OK as it was him who cleaned up toddler DD's sick on Tues and not me, and he looked after her all day the next day while I went to work. But I'm not so sure.

Im so scared. If it's going to happen I just want it over asap. 😢😢😢

I'm emetophobic and your post is SOOOO unhelpful. Just say nothing if you can't say something supportive, FFS.

Your holiday definitely won’t be ruined!

If you’re going to get it it should be within the next 42-78hours and after that you have more than likely dodged it.

Do you work?
Try and do things over the weekend which means you can carry around a sick bag like going on walks with less people around or staying in the garden.

If you get through the weekend ok then you should be fine on Monday.

Hopefully you get it today so you don’t make yourself I’ll with worry.

My kids have caught several bugs in their life, they are now 8 and 4, I have only caught 2 of those bugs that I can remember. It's not inevitable.

So is an "emetophobe" someone who doesn't like vomiting? Isn't that everyone in the entire world?

I really feel for you OP. I have anxiety (not emetophobia, but similar) and it’s awful.

One thing I’ve learned (with some CBT help) is that reality is never even half as bad as all the horrible scenarios our brains put us through. Anxiety and worrying are our brains trying to ‘control’ an uncontrollable situation. We think that if we run through every possible scenario in our heads and make plans for every eventuality then we’ll
somehow protect ourselves or even stop bad things from happening in the first place. When in reality all the worrying does is make us feel worse and worse.

When your thoughts are spiralling, I know it’s easier said than done but try to tell yourself ‘this is not what is actually going to happen, I cannot predict the future’ and focus on what you ACTUALLY know and what is happening in the present. All you know is that you’re not sick right now, so focus on that rather than trying to predict and control the future. (Again, I know it’s far easier said than done but this is what always helps me).

IF you are actually sick (and that’s a big if!) you probably know, somewhere deep down, that it won’t actually be as bad as you’re expecting and it will be over soon. Our fears are never actually that bad when we have to confront them. I have a friend who is very severely emetophobic too and she spent years living in absolute fear of being sick, and yet the one time she was actually sick she told me ‘it was actually ok, I got through it’. But even knowing that, she can’t stop herself from constantly thinking about the next time and dreading it. Anxiety and phobias are so horrible and we can’t make sense of them. Our brains just play the worst tricks on us sometimes.

Good luck OP, you will be ok and you’re going to get through this and have a fab holiday in just a few days’ time! I know it even if you don’t, so I hope that brings you some small comfort.

No. Google it. It’s far more than that and can affect pretty much every aspect of someone’s life. Nobody ‘likes’ vomiting but someone with emetophobia can have their entire life revolve around trying to avoid being sick. Worrying about every single thing they eat, drink, touch and whether it might make them sick. I even knew someone years ago who decided not to have children because she was so emetophobic she couldn’t face the thought of morning sickness. It’s a horrible horrible thing to suffer from.

Some of the comments on this thread are really unhelpful to say to an Emetophobe.

OP, you have my full sympathies as I too have this really irrational phobia. In fact I’m worse when my DH has it than my children. It’s not inevitable you will get it - I have managed to avoid all sickness bugs from DH and DS. Sometimes I was convinced I was coming down with it but I was actually making myself feel poorly from the anxiety and lack of food. Please do try and eat something.

I do think people with this phobia are less likely to be sick as were much more likely to be more vigilant with hygiene and cleaning. Like you say, if you’ve had bugs in the past year you may also already have a bit of immunity from these.

I always tell myself that if I’ve managed to avoid it within 72 hours then I’m safe. It’s likely you’ll be fine for your holiday. I can recommend the Cure your Emetophobia and Thrive program. It didn’t cure me, but it did help.

Take a very deep breath. Remind yourself, I am safe, I am healthy, I am fine.

If you do become unwell, take it easy, lie in a dark room with a cold flannel on your forehead. Panicking will make the sickness worse.

All the while, keep reminding yourself. In two sleeps this will be over. Sickness NEVER lasts more that 48 hours.

Each time you feel like losing control - I am safe, I am healthy, I am fine. This is only temporary.

Most importantly, be kind to yourself. We're all frightened of something. As for your holiday, don't worry - you will be completely recovered by Wednesday.

I have emetophobia as well. I have three children at home and have never caught sickness bugs off them despite being the one to clean it up mostly and having them sleep with me. It’s not a given

Totally agree with @FirewomanSam here. It's debilitating when you worry about it so much, it's much more than not liking something. And I'm with you @namechangemam it's a genuine fear that can interrupt your life. I failed my first year at uni as I would start to feel nauseous and fainty in lectures and would have to get up and leave. And then I decided I wouldn't have children for fear of morning sickness and having to deal with their bugs. Thankfully I got over that fear and do have kids, and have been fine. But it doesn't stop me worrying about the possibility of being sick, or trying to avoid any situation where my fears will ramp up. But, if it helps, the last time I was sick was in 2004 and I had to go on a cross channel ferry the next day, spend a week in the sticks in France with funny food and questionable toilets, and go on the rides at flippen Disneyland! It couldn't have been a worse combination! But I was absolutely fine, and I'm sure you will be too. Good luck OP, I know how hard it is x

To give you some hope it may not get to you, I have only ever once caught a sickness bug from my kids and my eldest is now 12. In July my youngest caught a bug going round school and was sick for a day, nobody else got it. Last week another was sick for an afternoon and again nobody got it. I do clean everything including door handles etc and wash all clothes and bedding but while I do not have a phobia so dont experience such feelings as you do, I did used to worry about it being inevitable everyone catching it (and ruining whatever plans we had over next few days) but now I dont.

Geez there's a lot of people have it then. That's quite a few in this thread.

We’ve had various sickness bugs and puking kids for whatever reason in the house over the years. I’ve only actually thrown up once I think, and even that was over really quickly.

I just don’t seem to catch it, or if I do then it maybe gives me a dodgy tum for a bit, but no vomiting. Sorry tmi! Clearly I’m just not prone to it, and I think some people aren’t. My DS seems to throw up at any little thing whereas my DD hardly ever does.

So it’s not a given that you’ll get it, or that if you do it’ll make you throw up! Also it will most likely be very soon and you’ll be completely fine by your holiday

No.

It is someone who has a severe phobia due to a previous traumatic experience. Much like the difference between "I don't like spiders" and "I'm absolutely terrified of them and cannot be in a room with them".

Google phobias and their origins. It's not even close to "I just don't like x or y". It's an irrational and completely subconscious fear that takes over and is not amenable to rational thought processes, usually rooted in trauma (in my case early childhood trauma)

The ignorance and unhelpful commends are astounding.

Thank you to those who have offered support, it's much appreciated

If it was norovirus I'd say you're going to get it. But it doesn't sound like norovirus. Noro symptoms are pretty full on.

If it's a bacterial infection, which seems more likely, good hygiene should protect you. Hand washing and beaching contact points. But honestly, if you do get it I can guarantee it will not be as bad as you fear and will be over very quickly, these things always are and the anticipation is ALWAYS worse than the event!

Here's the difference

On hearing that there's a vomiting bug doing the rounds, thought process and behaviour of a person who doesn't like being sick (most people, probably):

"Urgh I hope I don't get that. That won't be pleasant at all, I hate being sick". Carries on with their day as normal.

Person with emetophobia hears of vomiting bug (this is certainly typical of my experience and that of others I've spoken to, too):

Full blown panic attack, heart races beyond anything I can control, mind spirals.... "oh my god please do not let me get unwell, I will do anything to avoid this. I'd rather die than be sick". Start crying, sobbing uncontrollably. Start bleaching handles, spraying bleach directly onto my hands to wash them in it, stay at home near a toilet or bucket for the entire day, don't eat anything in case I'm sick............ not able to concentrate on anything else.

Hopefully that illustrates the difference.

I felt compelled to spell that out because there is so much ignorance around this awful debilitating phobia.

I totally understand how you feel. I started having panic attacks and nightmares about throwing up after a bad case of noro and it's my biggest fear. I know how tempting it is not to eat, I used to do this, but you don't want to make yourself prone to other illnesses, especially just before your holiday. Also, it can cause you to dry heave which although doesn't cause actual sick, has a similar feeling. Stick to BRAT diet if you really can't stomach anything. Did your family get sick once and were ok after that or were they sick several times? Fingers crossed for you.

Emetophobe here.
Thankfully I never caught a sickness bug off my DC when they were small.
There is hope

It might get you but might not! My daughter was really sick the other Tuesday evening all through the night. I thought we'd all escaped it but I started on the Saturday night. So thinking I must have picked it up off her while she was still contagious on Thursday or something because it is usually pretty quick.

One thing I learned in my pretty extensive research of noro: stopping yourself from being sick doesn't have a negative impact because the 'seat' of the virus is in the intestines - it's just that when your body is infected, it tries to get rid of it both ways.

As someone who hates vomiting, this has been helpful because I can nearly always stop myself from being sick - and after a while the body stops trying and the virus simply works itself through the other way.

Btw, bleach doesn't really work with noro, but soap and water does. Wash your hands often, and don't touch your face.

Sorry! Antibac doesn't work. Bleach and soapy water do.

@LaingsAcidTab yes I’ve heard that too. And also as soon as the body is infected, millions of killer T cells are at work destroying the virus.