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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Nothing like a Stepford wife.

57 replies

wantslotsofbabies · 19/01/2008 16:35

The other day at the doctor's surgery, there was a really neat mum with a toddler and a tiny. She was so neat and tidy, children were sweet and well behaved and the little one was being fed a home made pot of something all nicely. Without gagging.
I took stock of my ill fitting clothes, ever expanding waistline, hair that has not seen a brush for weeks, wellies covered with hen poop, (we have been snowed in here)...I just wondered, how the hell do some folk manage to be so organised?

OP posts:
Desiderata · 19/01/2008 16:38

Because they've got eff all else to do all day, I suspect

lizandlulu · 19/01/2008 16:41

how do you know it was home made food? it was parobably a jar like the rest of us!
the kids were probably having a good day and she was thanking her lucky stars that they were beahving well

pukkapatch · 19/01/2008 16:41

its because they are one of the born organised ones. they also have neat and clean houses, yet never seem to be actually doing any houseweork. that's because it doesnt need to be done, because the kids dont make a mess. everyone puts stuff back where it came fform, etc etc etc.
the fly lady explained thsi to me. i could never figure out why my house was a pigsty, yet i was always doing loads of housework, yet my friends house was always immaculate, she cooks and bakes, and yet never seems to be doing housework, always seems to have time to go out, etc.
she is born organised. i am not.

southeastastra · 19/01/2008 16:41

maybe her house is a pig sty

Desiderata · 19/01/2008 16:44

Did she have one of those little shiny blonde bobs?

allgonebellyup · 19/01/2008 16:46

she probably has no life outside her children and her home.

Or perhaps more a case of your paranoia raising its urrgly head?

Original poster
wantslotsofbabies · 19/01/2008 16:49

Shiny dark hair niftily done up in a carefree chinigon. Mine looked like a hen was sitting on my head...it probably was.
I have a job organising my shopping list and taking my tribe anywhere is a nightmare.

OP posts:
morningpaper · 19/01/2008 16:49

Last time I went to my V. Tasty Doctor's, he said, "You look nice, are you going anywhere special?" and I winked and said "To the Doctors."

lulumama · 19/01/2008 16:52

damned if you do, damned if you don;t

if she had been sat there in tracky bottoms, fleece and crocs,with screeching children being given crips, sausage rolls and froot shoots, you would have been on here with full judginess!!!

blueshoes · 19/01/2008 16:52

I may be scruffier than I like, but at least I've got fiesty children - so there!

needmorecoffee · 19/01/2008 16:56

some people are just born that way. Maybe she doesn't spend any time having fun on mumsnet

Original poster
wantslotsofbabies · 19/01/2008 16:58

Nahhh, I hope I'm not being all judgey lulumama, I'm just astounded that some mums are so well organised, 'specially first thing in the morning.

OP posts:
lulumama · 19/01/2008 17:07

no, i don;t think you are being judgey . i agree with SEA, her house probably looks like a tornado ripped through it

newmumofone · 28/02/2008 07:26

I think I might be one of the Stepford Wives, myself. Shiny blonde bob, tidy house, homemade food ? so far so irritating. I am, however, going out of my mind with boredom. DH works miles away, leaving at 6:45 and returning at 7:30. I work 3 days a week, but from home, so an excess of neaty-neatyness is just a symptom of major cabin fever. Hens sounds nice. Lucky you. xx

needmorecoffee · 28/02/2008 08:34

I have a friend who is one of those super organised. Her life runs like clockwork, perfect house, kids enrolled in all sorts of 'activities', garden immaculate.
Sigh
Sometimes I come home and cry

dippydeedoo · 28/02/2008 08:37

morningpaper - u foxy chick you lolol

happystory · 28/02/2008 08:46

But just remember some people literally can't bear mess and disorganisation. Maybe she spends hours looking like that/keeping her house tidy etc. who knows?

I used to babysit for a woman who had 2 boyys under 3. In the evenings the house was immaculate, you wouldn't have known children lived there except for the photos. I found it a little spooky.

sagacious · 28/02/2008 09:09

Ahh but you see dity wellies from hens.. she's probably thinking wow you live the "good life"

Grass is greener and all that...

DualCycloneCod · 28/02/2008 09:11

ah oyu saw me then?

allytjd · 28/02/2008 10:41

My house has got even messier since I discovered mumsnet. Last night I had a bad dream about the dirty laundry pile. Time to go and do some dreaded housework.

musicgirl · 28/02/2008 10:45

I think the secret is to get yourself ready in the moring first, before sorting out your kids. And get a cleaner in once a week. And send out your washing and ironing to be done. And having standing regular appointments at your hairdresser and beauty salon. And have weekly tennis matches with friends and pilate sessions to keep in shape. And throw dinner parties every week to stay at the top of the social pecking order.

When I was at uni I used to clean the houses of wealthy families and that is pretty much how the ladies run their lives, working or SAHM.

givemehope · 28/02/2008 11:02

Think 'wealthy' is the key word in music girl's post!
Perhaps the woman described in OP has a nanny? Or maybe she was the nanny? Or maybe she spends so much time on everything being neat and tidy and immaculate that she never gets to play with her kids and nobody has any FUN.
(This is what I tell my disheveled self in these situation)

hifi · 28/02/2008 11:19

ihave a cleaner twice a week, that puts me miles ahead in organisation, compared to friends who are also mothers. before i had children i wouldnt go out lookikng scruffy and i dont now, thats just me.
have manicure once a week ,gym 2 to 3 times , meet none mums socially every other week for a night in town. i do get bored, i only have one child and like to keep busy keeping all our lives organised.
one of my closest friends lives in absolute chaos, i dont judge her as she doesnt have the support i do, she always comments when we meet on how well turned out dd and i are,it does make me feel bad that i have quite an easy life.

spina · 28/02/2008 11:48

I fluculate between a well turned out mum with well behaved kids(all of us with shiny hair and nice clothes) and a tidy house and a total scruff bag with a messy house. I'm just coming out of a tidy house phase and I'm racked with guilt at the lack of time I'd spent with my kids while I cleaned the kitchen.

I'm not saying it's not poss to be tidy and fun, but i'm not organised by nature. My DH gets very stressed by how disorganised we are so I'm consantly trying to balance everyone's sanity and happiness in this house. It's driving me mad. For all we know she may have been at docs because it was getting too much for her. When I've been in a trying to be perfect phase,I've also been the most depressed.

i'm reading this thread with great interest as I want to be fun and tidy at the same time!!!

spina · 28/02/2008 11:49

...and I want hens!!!