To think I’m out of contraceptive options

[MandyRice]

I was on microgynon my whole life and loved it but at 44 I’m too old now.

Tried a coil twice and expelled it both times (doctor thinks it might be the shape of my cervix).

Now on Cerazette (mini pill) but it’s giving me mood swings.

Is there something I’m missing? I’m starting to think I need to get off hormonal contraception as the only one which suited me is no longer safe. What else is there? Diaphragm? I can’t get my head round how this works unless you know in advance exactly when you’re going to have sex or else kill the mood by disappearing off to the bathroom for 10 minutes, and the whole idea of it makes me feel a bit grim.

Am I missing something? DH isn’t up for a vasectomy and that’s fine. Half tempted just to assume I’m too old to have a baby and bin the lot.

Has there ever been a verified case of a woman over 50 having a natural conception and birth?

Yes, generally around 40 women a year in England & Wales and 5 in Scotland. It is a bit higher now because of IVF and donor eggs. I’d assume almost all the women affected were 50 or 51. At 44 Op would definitely still be taking a risk. The medical advice is you can stop using contraception when you’ve not had a period for a year.

I definitely wouldn’t ditch the contraceptives unless you wouldn't mind another baby.

I take cerelle - like you I used to take the proper pill but for whatever reason it didn’t suit me any more after kids.

i also tried the coil and it perforated my uterus so I had to have it removed via keyhole surgery. 😳

Could you try the patch or the injection?

I am older than you OP and still on the combined pill - no additional risk factors other than age.
But this won't go on forever. POP makes me have very odd moods and cry all the time. The implant and injections cause permanent periods.
Coil - constant infections.
Partner with ED - faffing around with packets and stuff is the best contraception there is!
I would like my tubes tied.

I do not get on with hormonal contraceptives at all. The implant was far worse than the mini pill. I have had a copper coil for 10 years and will never use anything else. It’s brilliant!

Condoms.

If they are sore like PP you need to see GP about that as that's not normal.

Why can't he get a vasectomy? You shouldn't have to go through the mood swings, pain of coils etc when there is a simpler more permanent solution.

If you are not intending to have more children then why not elect for a more permanent solution for either DH or yourself.
I'm often puzzled why many DP rule out vasectomy as an option. Personally I'd rather my DW did not subject her body to unnecessary hormonal treatment and the operation is very minor.
Many men seem to fear the procedure without fully investigating it. I would urge more men to research and understand this option rather than flatly ruling it out and leaving their OH to work out a solution.

I got on well with diaphram too for years & very reliable. Swapped to minimise pill on advice of GP promptly became pregnant with ectopic.
DH them had vasectomy. That solved everything

*mini pill I meant!

I'd prefer not to have sex if condoms were the only option. I assume OP isnt thick and she is aware they exist 🙄

I suggest a sex strike until your husband is ready to have a serious talk about vasectomy. Why has he ruled it out? Is he planning to have children with someone else?

I was skeptical about getting the implant, due to my depression but I've been absolutely fine. No mood changes at all. Also no period... win win!

Because a lot of people (myself included) prefer to simply be able to have sex without having to mess around with contraception at the time. It can be a mood killer.

There's no option for long term contraception for males at the moment, therefore it has to be us if we want it.

There's really no need to make a political point here, it's not needed or helpful - and you know N O T H I N G about the OP or her relationship to be assuming that her DP is pushing anything on her at all.

@Afterfire and so is hormonal contraceptives.
They make me suicidal. So when we're not having any more children my husband is having a vasectomy.
No condoms, no horrible hormone contraception! Winner!

Would recommend you consider a diaphragm. Can be put in several hours in advance, and if you need to put it in spontaneously, it’s very quick and easy once you’ve got the hang of it (and getting used to it means that you’ll be able to use the equivalent shape menstrual cup, which is amazing and means you can have sex on your period no issues). I stopped using it because my body reacted against the spermicide but if this hadn’t happened, would definitely have continued.

✨condoms✨

Does no one use a diaphragm any more?

@LindaEllen The OP said her partner doesn’t want a vasectomy so we do know
S O M E T H I N G about the situation.

Contraception is a political issue whether you like that or not. Very little research goes into male contraception, it’s very firmly seen as the woman’s responsibility. I am forever having hormonal contraceptives pushed on me by the doctor despite my repeated refusal. My husband is never asked about his use of contraception. We have one child that we planned for (condoms can work in a long term relationship!) so it’s not like the doctor can be concerned for my health or NHS resources. It’s just sexism.

condoms! honestly its easiest

I haven't used anything else but those for 15 years

💐 @LindaEllen . I’m definitely just looking for practical advice- I haven’t put all the info down here as i don’t want to put another person’s medical info online without their say so.

Agree that there’s a huge political dimension to contraception but that wasn’t why I started the thread. Obviously fine if people want to discuss that here though 🙂

Thank you to those who’ve given info about the diaphragm. Sounds like that’s an option I could explore a bit more. Can you (or your partner) feel it?

How long have you been on the mini pill? I had awful mood swings for the first 4-6 weeks but its settled down and working great for me now

Contraceptive implant is slightly lower dose than the mini pill and is continuous so may give fewer mood swings

Have you considered female condoms?

In June data published by the Office for National Statistics showed the number of births to 50-plus women has quadrupled over the last two decades, up from 55 in 2001 to 238 in 2016. During that period there were 1,859 births in the UK to women over 50, and 153 to women over 55.

most of these mothers relied on assisted conception to become pregnant.

Most. but not all.

Condoms!!

Depo Provera injection, only came off it when I reached 55 years. Minimal side effects (well, compared to menopause)