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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Who's crazy, me or the landlady?

63 replies

AnxiousTenant · 31/07/2022 20:40

Not sure where to begin, sorry this will probably be a long post!

Returned to UK recently after living abroad for 6 years. Came back because my parents are very elderly (90s) and their health has been nosediving rapidly in recent months. I’m so glad I came back when I did, because over the past couple of weeks I’ve found myself frantically sorting out my dad’s admission to a care home (complex medical needs + dementia) and have just moved in with mum to help her work out next steps. Very difficult times.

Until yesterday, I was renting a place near mum and dad’s. Very nice 1-bedroom accommodation, clean, tidy, everything in order. Only snag: rottweiler and spaniel left alone in the garden all day, barking non stop. I work from home and this wasn’t much fun, but I got used to it.

I made the accommodation very cosy with pictures, curtains, rugs, fairy lights, cushions, etc. It completely transformed the place, so much that when the landlady came round one evening she was oooh-ing and aaah-ing over it and saying how she’d like to keep it that way when I left.

I asked if I could replace the tumble dryer with a dishwasher, and the landlady was kind enough to pay for the plumber to sort this out for the dishwasher I bought. The tumble dryer got taken away and instead, I used a Brabantia rotary washing line instead (which I bought from Amazon, spike sunk into the ground outside).

The furnishings provided by the landlady included a clunky standard lamp that I didn’t like and never used. One day I opened a door and it pushed against the lamp, which fell to the floor, breaking the plastic bit that the bulb screws into (sorry, not sure what this is called!). That weekend, I took it to a local electrical repair shop to get it fixed. The electrician examined it for about 30 seconds but was puzzled by the single wire protruding, and said he couldn’t help. Everyone since has told me it’s an easy fix, maybe a tenner, and that he confused the wiring to the bulb with the internal wiring of the lamp. However, I ran out of time to get this sorted out.

When I gave notice to my landlady, I mentioned the damage to the lamp. She said it was terribly precious to her, and had been very expensive. Apparently it would all be OK if I left her the curtains, rugs, washing line, pictures on the walls, etc by way of compensation. While going around, she sneered that the curtains in the hallway weren’t long enough. Like a mug (which I am), I found myself apologising and saying I’d lengthen them with fabric from the ones in the lounge, which were too long (I’d just selected the nearest lengths when ordering them online).

When we next crossed paths in the garden, a week or so later, by then we’d both spoken to various people who all agreed the electrician had been an idiot and the lamp should be easily fixed, maybe costing a tenner. I was relieved, as I am struggling a bit financially at the moment and the thought of having to replace all the nice things I’d invested in was rather stressful.

However, not wanting to let her down with the curtains, I ordered thread and sewing materials to be delivered during my final week (mine are all still at home abroad), then spent hours turning up curtains this week when I should have been packing (I was also working long hours and trying to fit in visits to my dying father, not wishing to sound dramatic but still!). I left the curtains, a rug, and the dishwasher, all of which I had bought brand new. As I left, I gave her husband (she was away) a note explaining that I was taking the rotary washing line for my mum, who has one that’s now falling apart (she’s had it over 30 years; I think her need is greater) but explaining that if they wanted one they could buy one for about £80 on Amazon. This family, let’s say, are not short of cash. I also enclosed £20 to cover the cost of repairing the lamp – her husband told me not to worry about it.

So, I just got a text from her:
Hi AnxiousTenant, just got back to check [your accommodation], our agreement was for you to leave the washing line, not £20. I will ask [the agency] to replace the lamp form your deposit, minus £20. Thanks [Landlady] xx”

I’m not sure how to reply. Sort of need this like a hole in the head right now.

This is my first experience of renting in about 40 years, and I have no idea what my rights are. The letting agency have a good relationship with her, but I’m a stranger to them. Feeling very anxious about this, as I have no idea what they might deduct from my deposit. It might be cheaper for me to just buy her another brand new Brabantia rotary clothes line, but she and her family are ostentatiously comfortable and I am a bit skint! I left the place absolutely spotless and have photos to prove it, but what happens next?!??!

AIBU?
You are NOT being unreasonable = Leaving the brand new dishwasher, curtains, and rug that you bought, and making the place spotless, and paying for the lamp repairs, should be enough to keep her satisfied.
You ARE being unreasonable = You should replace the lamp with a new one, however much it cost.

OP posts:
dementedpixie · 31/07/2022 20:44

Yabu for leaving all those possessions tbh. She should be paying you not the other way round

Iamclearlyamug · 31/07/2022 20:46

Has your deposit been properly protected? If not, that's illegal and the court could award you up to 3 times your deposit in compensation. If it is protected, it's not down to the agency to decide whether to take money from it - raise a dispute with whichever scheme your deposit is lodged with, and they will independently decide whether to take the money.

Finally, was there a thorough inventory done before you moved in? The landlady cannot claim "betterment" therefore if the lamp wasn't brand new when you moved in, it's incredibly unlikely she would be awarded the cost of a brand new one when you leave.

I think she's trying it on!

Ludo19 · 31/07/2022 20:47

Your landlady saw you coming I'm afraid. She's a cheeky bitch. I'd get some legal advice.

OooohAhhhh · 31/07/2022 20:48

She's taking you for a mug! The cheek of her!
Fix the lamp & take everything you have personally bought with you, including the dishwasher & washing line. You aren't obliged to leave any of it .

Isaidnoalready · 31/07/2022 20:48

Are you in a deposit scheme? She can't just deduct money you can challenge it and explain you left expensive items at her request and paid for the lamp repair you either want your items returned or your full deposit back

TabithaTittlemouse · 31/07/2022 20:48

I think yabu for being a mug!
I’m sorry that you are having a rubbish time. She’s absolutely taking advantage of you.

1dontunderstand · 31/07/2022 20:50

I tell her that I’m that case, you’ll be around to collect your things, including the dishwasher (why did you leave a dishwasher if you are skint?)

PurBal · 31/07/2022 20:50

Did the agent do a check in and check out? Given all the additional items should be an easy one to evidence that you left enough property to cover the lamp. She’s being a CF. But you shouldn’t have left those things.

LostForWords2021 · 31/07/2022 20:53

Oft, land lady is a CF

SweatyLaBetty · 31/07/2022 20:55

I'm a LL, and would never take advantage of a tenant the way she has with you.

You've been an amazing tenant and she should be reimbursing you towards (not the full cost, but a %) the things you left. She's hugely unreasonable.

Where is your deposit currently kept?

If the lamp was that precious, she should keep it in her possession.

Don't respond to her, go via the deposit scheme (it should be with the DPS).

Flamingooooooooooooooo · 31/07/2022 21:21

I've rented around ten different houses over the last 20 ish years. This is total insanity, you're being taken for a mug. First thing tomorrow, pop in to the agency and talk with them. Don't deal with the women. You shouldn't have left a thing, lengthening curtains?? Now I've heard it all!

Danikm151 · 31/07/2022 21:28

You’ve essentially set up perfectly for her next tenant who she will charge more.
she’s taken you for a ride. Take your own possessions back and tell her she can shove the lamp up her arse.

Hankunamatata · 31/07/2022 21:32

Call the agent that you will be back round to collect the items you left rug, curtains etc and the £20. They can deduct cost of the lamp but account must be taken for age and wear and tear.

Jibbajabba1 · 31/07/2022 21:33

Sorry to hear about your dad 💐

The landlady sounds horrid - if anything, she owes you!

TibetanTerrah · 31/07/2022 21:37

The landlady sounds awful, and you spectacularly naive. Tell her you will be round to collect your things and she can put a request in with with TDS* and they will decide a deduction for the lamp.

*if she hasn't put it in a scheme you can make a claim for the whole lot back plus up to 3x as compensation. Wouldn't put it past her.

BathshebaKnickerStickers · 31/07/2022 21:43

You came over a few weeks ago on a short term rent while you put your parents, aged 90+ into a care home until they settled.

in that time you bought and installed a dishwasher, put up pictures and bought a rug, and also broke inventory items (this special lamp).

could you have hand washed dishes and not cared about rugs for a couple of weeks and concentrated on your parents?

DanielRicciardosSmile · 31/07/2022 21:44

1dontunderstand · 31/07/2022 20:50

I tell her that I’m that case, you’ll be around to collect your things, including the dishwasher (why did you leave a dishwasher if you are skint?)

This.

GrannyAchingsShepherdsHut · 31/07/2022 21:46

What the hell?! Why did you leave all that if the lamp was a £10 fix?!

I'd tell her that it's fine if she wants to go via the deposit scheme, and you'll be round to collect your dishwasher, rug, curtains and your £20!

At this rate I can see you having to pay out of your deposit to 'dispose of' the things you left behind!!

DottyLittleRainbow · 31/07/2022 21:48

She is being a CF. Tell her to crack on. And say you’ll be back for all your stuff that you left - dishwasher, curtains, etc etc.

AnxiousTenant · 31/07/2022 21:48

Iamclearlyamug · 31/07/2022 20:46

Has your deposit been properly protected? If not, that's illegal and the court could award you up to 3 times your deposit in compensation. If it is protected, it's not down to the agency to decide whether to take money from it - raise a dispute with whichever scheme your deposit is lodged with, and they will independently decide whether to take the money.

Finally, was there a thorough inventory done before you moved in? The landlady cannot claim "betterment" therefore if the lamp wasn't brand new when you moved in, it's incredibly unlikely she would be awarded the cost of a brand new one when you leave.

I think she's trying it on!

The deposit was lodged with some independent agency, "mydeposits custodial" -- but I don't really understand the process. I guess I'm about to find out more about how it all works...!

Thank you all for your replies. Sorry for the late responses, I've been keeping mum company this evening.

OP posts:
AnxiousTenant · 31/07/2022 21:50

TabithaTittlemouse · 31/07/2022 20:48

I think yabu for being a mug!
I’m sorry that you are having a rubbish time. She’s absolutely taking advantage of you.

Haha! Yes, I am a mug, definitely.

People like this, in fact people generally, kind of terrify me.

OP posts:
AnxiousTenant · 31/07/2022 21:51

1dontunderstand · 31/07/2022 20:50

I tell her that I’m that case, you’ll be around to collect your things, including the dishwasher (why did you leave a dishwasher if you are skint?)

I left it because plumbing it in cost her about £150. Admittedly the dishwasher cost twice that much, but it's not like I can use it here at mum's as she already has one. It seemed spiteful to take it when future residents could benefit from it and I'd just be trying to find space for it to sit in the garage unused.

OP posts:
oviraptor21 · 31/07/2022 21:52

My Deposits is one of the three official deposit schemes so just go through them.

www.citizensadvice.org.uk/housing/renting-privately/ending-your-tenancy/getting-your-tenancy-deposit-back/

AnxiousTenant · 31/07/2022 21:55

PurBal · 31/07/2022 20:50

Did the agent do a check in and check out? Given all the additional items should be an easy one to evidence that you left enough property to cover the lamp. She’s being a CF. But you shouldn’t have left those things.

I like to be kind where possible. I don't understand vicious people like this. But I don't think she's all that bright.

OP posts:
Brigante9 · 31/07/2022 21:57

I’m appalled that you left all that lovely new stuff. I would price up what you have left her, ask for the £20 back and put in a complaint to the deposit scheme who you should contact urgently and tell them the estimate of what you left and that you gave £20 for the repair to the lamp.

It is unusual for them the deposit scheme) to take money off, tbh and she can whinge all she likes, but you have more than compensated her for the broken lightbulb fixture. She’s being grabby and is a disgraceful landlady. Never leave anything for the landlord, that’s YOUR property.